I may have sealed my fate.....

atypical

Well, I have been trying to fade peacefully for months, for the sake of my wife and family. To do this, I have had to hold my tongue about most of what I know, and I have done a good job of it until now. The other day, I was hanging out with my buddy who misses most meetings, but still believes it's the truth. He is a cool guy and a good drinking partner, and I enjoy hanging out with him. He has been df'd twice and doesn't think he has to please anybody at the hall, as long as he goes to meetings.

Well, all that is perfectly fine with me, I don't care what he does as far as the jws are concerned. But anyway, while we hanging out and drinking, he sort of starts lecturing me. Not in a way that made me mad, but he was saying that I just shouldn't stop going to meetings. He said I don't have to talk to anyone, I don't have to make pleasant conversation, I just need to show up.

Well, long story short, after a few hours the wine erased my better judgement and I started opening up. By the time I was done, I had convinced him that there is no biblical basis for disfellowshipping, that witnesses are taught to serve a group of men, not Jehovah, and that it is wrong for us to spend our entire life feeling guilty and worthless because we don't make more meetings or don't get more hours in service. He tried to argue with me at first, but by the time I was done with each subject, he just shook his head and said simply, "You're right. You're right." Well it felt good momentarily, but the next morning I woke up with a feeling of dread. I don't know if he will repeat anything I said or not, but he hasn't talked to me since and I feel very nervous about the whole thing.

I don't know if the brothers could df me for what I said, but I have a feeling they would try to say I am leading people away. As much as I want to be true to myself, I do not want to be df'd because of the strife it would cause in my family. I am guessing probably many here have had the same or similar situation.

GetBusyLiving

I went through the exact same scenario with a group of friends while I was still in the wits. I explained how the Dub doctrines are crap and they all just quietly agreed with me. But they're still dubs. Its disappointing but some people are suckers.

If your friend tells the elders they'll probably form a judicial commitee to find out if you still believe in their retarded "faithful and discreet slave" doctrine. Good luck dude.

GBL

Honesty

Get ready for the dreaded 'Loyalty Test':

Mine went somewhat like this:

Question from elder: "Do you still believe Jehovah is using the WTBTS as the FDS?"

Answer: "They never were appointed as a FDS because Matthew 24:45-47 is just a parable and was never intended to be taken literally."

Question from elder: "Do you still consider yourself one of Jerhovah's Witnesses?"

Answer: "I consider myself a witness for Jesus just as His followers have since 29 in the year of our Lord."

Reply from elder: "That's apostasy!!!"

Answer: "The only apostasy going on around here is the Watchtower Society. Make any announcement you feel is legal because I am outta here."

CLICK

forsharry

I feel your pain there. Same thing happened to me. Opened up to a good friend who agreed with me completely and 'understood' my pain and confusion and doubts...and then turned around and went to the PO with all that I said.

Just try to let that dread go. If it's gonna go down in a bad way it will. You've said only what you believe, your conscience is clean, your soul can rest easy at night for that...at least for that. However, this is out of your hands for the time being. Worry about what you can fix...let go what you can't. I read that your family's involved...and I'm so sorry to hear that...

atypical

Thanks, GBL. I am afraid that might happen. I guess I will have to figure out how I will answer. It would gratifying to rip into them, but to accomplish my goal I might have to deny what I said. I really have never been a liar, though, it just goes against the grain. That's why I am worried, because I have a way of saying "screw it" at the last minute and mouthing off.

AlmostAtheist

It's up to you, of course, but without two witnesses, they got nuthin'. Just deny you said it. You were both drinking, maybe he misunderstood.

Lying to liars about telling the truth about lies. There's a certain magic to it, eh? ;-)

Dave

blondie

I don't know if the brothers could df me for what I said,

If you only said it to this one person ever, it's his word against yours. You can just say he misunderstood what you said.

Two witnesses are good enough for pedophiles, it should be good enough for you.

Blondie

Frannie Banannie

It would gratifying to rip into them, but to accomplish my goal I might have to deny what I said. I really have never been a liar, though, it just goes against the grain.

Atypical, if your friend runs back to the elders and divulges your confidential conversation with him, I'd say he was lying to you when he sat there agreeing with you. If you hear from the elders, you KNOW it will have come from him. In case you want to see some poetic justice, you can just tell the elders, in that case, that your friend is just using your inactivity and a few lies about your conversation to make himself look better in their eyes in order to sweep some of his bad rep from being df'd twice under the carpet.

Finally-Free

What about the 2 witness rule? Was he the only person that heard you?

I'm all for telling the elders to f*ck off and all that, but my way is not good for everyone. What was it the Watchtower said about "theocratic warefare"? You don't have to tell the truth to someone who's not entitled to it. You're not under any obligation to tell them the truth about your beliefs. Do what you need to do to save your family.

W

daystar

You can deny it all. Or... take your "buddy" down with you if he "turns you in". He said he agreed with everything you said, right?

I may have sealed my fate.....

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