The Bad Habit of Being Negative

by Billygoat 22 Replies latest members private

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    It's a great idea; I know because I've kept a 'good thoughts' notebook for a few months and it has started changing my outlook on the bad things that happen to me. A 'happiness' website suggested keeping a 'good thoughts' diary separate to any other diary which is often used to 'purge' bad thoughts, and as I was battling depression for a long time I was giving anything a go. Of everything I tried, this was the most powerful self-help technique at beating my depression and turning it the other way - literally changing me from a depressed person to somebody with a positive outlook. Now I don't keep a regular diary; everything that happens I have to put a positive spin on.

    - We had a motorbike accident recently, but we weren't hurt and the only damage was ego and money. We learnt not to ride in an unfamiliar area while tired and sick, to spare us from a serious accident in the future.
    - I twisted my ankle falling down the stairs, but there are no broken bones, I got to chill out for two days and I now know not to keep anything on the stairs.

    Any time I get really down I can read through it and remind myself of how great my life actually is, and I remember that there are many reasons why that's true. Yes I know it's corny, but it worked for me - what sounded like the most simplistic advice turned out to be the best.

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    Sounds like a GREAT idea. I too will keep a blessings journal.

    Nice post Andi.

    And how are things going with you? Are you back to work?

  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    blah, negativity sucks... is that negative for u??? i think our negativity is because of our upbringing...

    the infamous one

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Andi this is a fabulous post!

    I was experiencing talk therapy with a counselor and the counselor was teaching me to "be positive". He taught me that being positive was something I had control over. IT WAS A CHOICE TO BE MADE. Let me say that again. Being positive was a choice to be made.

    You want to know a secret Andi? I learned this from reading of all things and *gasp* I was a J-dub at the time so I hid this book while reading it and read it only while no one was home. It was Norman Vincent Peale's book "The Results of the Power of Positive Thinking". LOL yeah it was the book he wrote about the feed back he got on his best seller, "The Power of Positive Thinking"! Well I wasn't half way through the first book when I ordered the second one. This book became my Bible of choice for a very long time!

    I was in my late late 30's or early 40's when I read those books and they really made a huge impact on me and I'm sure were the stepping stone to my getting involved in ACOA groups and therapy. I remember thinking when I was reading those books that the first one was written the year I was born and what a difference my life would have been if instead of my Mom being contacted by the JW's she would have gotten his book and read it and put it into practice.

    Later I boldly ordered his Guideposts magazine and had them sent to my house some months they would arrive with the WT and Asleep! At one time we had a JW postman too! LOL I was an Apostate and didn't know it! LOL Actually I did know and hid the magazines, books and other "stuff" I had.

    Yep it's a choice everyday when you wake up you can make the choice that you're going to be grumpy and let every little (and big) things get you down or you can raise to the challenge of the day with a smile and a song in your heart. We all have and will face challenges everyday it's our outlook on how much we let them affect us.

    theimfamousone:

    i think our negativity is because of our upbringing...

    Bingo! But it can be unlearned, just as it was learned only it takes half the time, twice the focus.

  • Eyebrow2
    Eyebrow2

    There is always room for improvement.

    Sounds like your grandmother operated in crisis mode most of her life. This makes it very difficult to be position about anything...you get crisis happening, even the little ones, and sometimes even create them yourself (usually without realizing it.) Your grandmother has reacted to her life like one of my sister's has. And hse is really tough to be around.

    Personally, I had to make a conscious decision about 8 or 9 years ago to quick being a downer. It isn't easy sometimes is it? Even today, although I feel lucky to have my husband and kids, I sometimes find myself getting sucked in by the negativity black hole. Negativity is like gravity: it is a lot easy to sit down than to stand up.

    Very good post.

  • ChristianObserver
    ChristianObserver

    Thanks for that Andi.

    It is good to be reminded of the power of positive thinking.

    Best wishes!

  • Enigma One
    Enigma One

    Good God Billygoat...could you shorten your post up. It's waaay too long. I can't take time to read it right now. I'm busy gossiping on the phone right now.

    :P LOL

  • Eyebrow2
    Eyebrow2

    Engima...you are such a )$*%&$))#_#...oh I am sorry...back to being negative again!!!

    Andi...forgot to wish you a happy bday.

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Just wanted to clarify something for the folks back home:

    • The soft fur of Henry's ears.
    She's talking about the dog, not the husband there.
  • banished1
    banished1

    Billygoat that was really lovely.
    You are a sweet girl to take the time to post such a beautiful thought.
    Thankyou.

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