If raised JW - or in while young - how strict were your parents?

by Jamelle 50 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Jobees
    Jobees

    My father was never a freak witness. Not that he helped save us from our evil mother. I still have issues with that. While he sat at home on his butt, watching the Xfiles (I love that show) we sat at every meeting and were miserable. All seven of us (siblings) we raised in that religion. Only one is still attending meetings. Her and my mother don't talk at all.

    Some of the things that we endured as children:

    • Like most of you, we were never able to miss a meeting. I remember, when I was 16, telling my mother I did not want to attend meetings anymore, that I wanted to stay home with Dad. She told me that if I ever decided I did not want to be a witness I would have to move out.
    • No Smurfs!
    • I was an excellent athlete. Even if I am just a girl. I was never allowed to play sports in HS. That killed me!
    • I remember giving a guy in HS my phone number. When he called me that night my mother told him that it was a business line and he was to never call back. Liar.
    • One night, when I was 20 and still living at home, I went to the beach with four other witness girls. We got back at 2 in the morning. My mother was up waiting for me. She started screaming at me and ended up throwing all the dishes in her cabinets on the kitchen floor.
    • I was not allowed to be a bridesmaid in my sisters wedding at the KH because I went to my prom (without permission, I snuck out).
    • IT'S NOT 18, IT'S THE ROOF!!!!!!!!!!!
  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    i had an elder father who beat me for doing what i was supposed to do.... for talkin to other elders kids... for not answering five times per watchtower, even though i put up my hand for every single paragraph! doesn't get much stricter than that i think... and i have thrown up many times in the halls washrooms cuz i was so sick, but still forced to go to the hall....

    the infamous one

  • young hearts, be free..
    young hearts, be free..

    Woooooooh, SHIT !!!! I guess my upbringing wasn't so bad after all I had a girlfriend (WORLDLY too) when I was 12, played rugby for my school, college and club, went to the school dances, listened to heaps of music, and I was even on the TM School, gave #4 Talks, was asked to give opening prayer for the Public Talk when I was 16, and served in the Quickbuild teams.....And my Dad was a MS too...... I guess he was trying to keep a sensible and normal balance for his kids, growing up in a split family

    Fuck I feel sorry for you lot, you guys had it hard for sure!!!!

  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    at leasti was a good liar, still played my sports and had my good times... i figured im getting beaten either way, might as well have fun

    the infamous one

  • young hearts, be free..
    young hearts, be free..

    ...theinfamousone...... It's great how by their own policies and laws they actually bred us to be clever thinkers and more cunning than your average geezer eh!!

  • theinfamousone
    theinfamousone

    hells yes my good friend.. damn, when they yelled at me about skool, i was like peace out! and i ran away before my dad tried to beat me cuz if he tried i woulda fought back this time...

    the infamous one

  • PaNiCAtTaCk
    PaNiCAtTaCk

    • I remember helping my mom and sister destroy her "Another one bites the dust" CD by Queen after backmasking was mentioned at the bookstudy.
    • I went to a trade show with my dad in Memphis TN to look at new merchandise for the family business and being asked to preview a new cartoon that might be aired on TV. I was interviewed by a couple of people afterward and of course I loved it. It ended up being very successful. You may have heard of it, its called SMURFS! About 6 years later I was having to throw away my Smurf Village after they were called blue devils and a demon story was told at the Hot Springs AR, convention.
    • I would get in big trouble for saying Gosh or anything like that so me and my friends starting saying DOG. So if something went wrong I would just say Oh DOG. It was quickly pointed out that DOG is God spelled backwards and that it was just as bad!
    • I remember having to leave the drive in Theatre because Ghostbusters got to bad for us to watch. We didnt know it was on that night or we would have never make the 20 mile drive and attempted to watch it.
    • When I had sleep overs we always had to go in service even if we stayed up till 6 in the morning, which we always did.
    • No spiderman Cartoons or Scooby doo ghost cartoons.
    • My worldly Grandma would call us and tell us to come get our Christmas present every year. My mom would have me call her back and tell her that we couldnt accept it until January.
    • We walked out of lots and lots of movies. In fact back in the 80's there were always JW's mentioning how that had to walk out of this movie or that movie. It was like they were going to movies just so they could walk out and tell everyone.
    • I remember when I was ten my parents getting a sheparding call. My mom and dad told me to go outside and play but the Elders quickly said that it would be good if I stayed to hear them. They were giving us a sheparding call because my Moms hours had slipped below the national average and they were going to remove her from playing the piano at the congregation as she had done for years and years and years. My parents are self imployed and they were having to work Saturdays and long hours.So after that we made Sunday our service day after the meeting. That was the first time I remember seeing my Mom Cry and she did it right in front of the two Elders and my Dad.
  • Soledad
    Soledad

    My mother was strict. I wasn't allowed to really have too many friends, the few that I did have if she felt that something was wrong with them she would force me to terminate the friendship.

    Only once can I remember spending a Saturday at a schoolmate's house. My mother told me to not eat any of their food. she said the food "might have blood in it" So I had to starve myself all day.

    As I got older, the list of things got longer. In the 6th grade I wanted to join the basketball team--No. Didn't get a good reason as to why I couldn't either. In fact I was often chastised by my mother for even thinking about it----"I can't believe that is the only thought going through your head right now" Jeez, I was only 11 years old what was the big deal? Also my music teacher wanted me to join the school's vocal choir. Out of the question.

    I think that over time I got so used to my mother's stupid reasoning that I never even bothered to ask for anything I just withdrew from life because I figured that is what she wanted. No wonder I was so depressed for so long.

  • caligirl
    caligirl

    Well, they probably wish that they were much more strict with all of us because we all left!! I had friends that were not witnesses (I wasn't allowed to hang out with them outside of school (unless I invited them to the memorial, which I did ONCE and ONLY ONCE. Thankfully, the girl didn't dump me as a friend despite enduring a night of pure torture!)

    My husband calls me CC, for "country club" - and it was compared to what he went through- but that didn't change my perception of all of it being wrong. My parents did not destroy any of our stuff, didn't police our reading material ( I remember in particular VC Andrews and Stephen King books) didn't limit our TV, and only expected us to keep the congregation minimums on service. We rarely had to suffer a family study (only a few weeks here and there when the annual guilt trips encouragement came in the form of KM parts about making sure you have a family study. THey were happy if we answered once, or even raised our hands a few times at the WT study. Once I was 11-12, I was allowed to sit with my friends, and at 14 when I started having my own money, I no longer had to share a hotel room with them at assemblies- I could share with my friends. Nor did I have to sit with them at assemblies- we just had to check in and let them know where we were sitting.

    So I don't have a lot to complain about in that area. All I can think is HOLY CRAP- I would have flipped out at 12 if I had been required to live like many of you were! No way would I have survived ( Too independent from a very young age) So my hat is off to all of you that lived with those bars and limitations!

  • Cygnus
    Cygnus
    back in the 80's there were always JW's mentioning how that had to walk out of this movie or that movie.

    Yeah, that was en vogue in these parts as well. 4 jaydub 18 or 19 year olds walked out of "Parenthood" when Steve Martin's character got a blowjob from his wife while driving (implied - nothing was actually shown, and it set up a funny scene where they ended up in a wreck).

    A couple of additional thoughts:

    There was a very popular JW family and over the course of knowing them for nearly 20 years I spent a few days at their house as a kid. The exchanges between sons and father were surprisingly upsetting. An example. Father: "Would you mind getting a garbage bag?" Son, with a snarky tone: "Yes, but I'll do it anyway."

    I spent the night at one JW kid's parents' house, and he spent all night trying to convince me he was an alien from outer space. Drew me a picture of his spacecraft and wrote his home planet's alphabet

    I and my siblings weren't prevented from watching anything on TV. Smurfs, Monty Python, Bizarre, Benny Hill, any sports. The only time my dad was strict about TV was one Memorial night; he wouldn't let me put the hockey game on. The next year and years after he gave in and let me watch my beloved Buffalo Sabres. :)

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit