Is someone in your congregation confused? There is help!
Coming soon to the Local Congregations:
ANOINTIFICATION NEUTRALIZER®
100 SUPPOSITORIES
Unsure of your destiny? Confused by feelings of uncertainty?
Anointification Neutralizer suppositories can help maintain a healthy spiritual outlook. The death of a mate or some other tragedy might cause some to lose interest in life on earth. Or they might desire the same destiny as a close friend who professes to be an anointed Christian. The false religious idea that all good people go to heaven might lead some to think that they have the heavenly calling. Others may be affected by medications or deep emotions that could cause misjudgment. Still others may be ambitious for authority now or as a future joint heir with Christ.
Christians who have, or should have, the earthly hope do well to study hard and take Anointification Neutralizer. Spiritual outlook generally returns to normal (earthly) after about two (2) weeks.
Directions: For adults, insert one (1) suppository in rectum daily, preferably with Bible reading. For those baptized less than a year who profess to have a heavenly calling, shove at least four (4) suppositories up the rectum daily. Red wine and matzo should not be consumed while taking this product.