Frustrated with bible student GF

by datingAjwgirl 38 Replies latest members private

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  datingAjwgirl

  HELP!

  Its like talking to a brickwall or to Bill Clinton (what is the definition of is, how do you know thats what they meant) .

  Seriously she thinks she is helping me or at least she thinks she is trying to help me by answering "my questions" even though all she is really doing is going into a diatribe about what she memorised from her last meeting.

  When she cant get throught to me or I win an argument (discussion) she says let me go ask an elder then she comes back with some B.S. excuse. When I call her bluff she says "why dont you talk with the elders, Im not getting throught to you, you cant see what I see, I dont want to mis inform you" NO NO NO she doesnt want to admit she is wrong or they are wrong.

  How do you get through to them? anyone?
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  GetBusyLiving

  Welcome to the board! You can't get through to them! It's amazing but true! They're cultists. Read the book "Combatting Cult Mind Control".. and stick around here.

  GBL
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  love2Bworldly

  Welcome! Hate to tell you, but when you said talking to a brick wall? Well most of the JWs are like that.
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  95stormfront

  Unless less she's ready to admit that the WT organization is not God driven and the religious sham we all know it to be, there will be no getting through to her. It's something she'll have to see for herself.

  It's not surprising that she's trying to put the onus on you as just not getting it...not seeing it as she sees it.......this is a trick JWs use to immediately put anyone who doesn't agree with whatever their diatribe de Juere on the defensive. The implication that there is probably something wrong with you for just not seeing things there way.

  What you're seeing now is just the tip of the mental gymnastics JWs will go through to not admit that the WT could be wrong on any subject. It'll only get worse as your relationship goes on.

  If I were you ....I'd run. And if you happen to tire, slow down and see her behind you......RUN FASTER !!!!!
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  Check_Your_Premises

  Go find a girlfriend who doesn't expect you to talk to the elders.

  Lotta fish in the sea. Most have problems. There are worse problems then cult membership, but there are a lot of problems that are far smaller. Get one with one of those problems.

  She can't be that hot!

  Nothing you say will matter. You can't reason with her, because she is not interested in truth. She is interested in protecting her sacred ground.

  Think of it this way. You have some thought that if true, would be simply to difficult to bear. Let's say you are really gay deep down. Now as you stand, I could show you a picture of you doing the nasty with say Charles Taze Russel. Are you going to give a damn about my picture? No! You are to scared to consider the idea that you might be gay. You will likely get hostile, and want to punch me for suggesting such a thing.

  Your gf wants/needs to believe that the jw is God's organization. Only she truly knows why that is. Maybe she was raised in it. Maybe she had a bad experience and now is overcompensating by seeking the security of a group that has it all figured out. She doesn't have to question anymore. She doesn't have to doubt her conscience. She simply has to obey.

  You need to figure out as well as you can WHY she needs to believe this garbage. You also need to figure out ways to encourage her own personal growth such that she will trust her own conscience enough to question the org. Right now if something doesn't make sense to her, she assumes she is to dumb to understand the amazingly perfect org.

  You cannot attack the org. To do so, violates her sacred ground, and makes you a threat. If you have done this, stop. You can ask questions. But showing her some thing you found on the internet will likely make you an ex boyfriend.

  Read the previously mentioned book by Steven Hassan, or his newer book, Releasing the Bonds. Hang around here. We get a guy like you about once a week.

  Or just go get a gf who isn't in a cult.
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  misspeaches

  Hi and welcome.

  The problem with your girlfriend and not being able to have a discussion with her is that JW's are subtly trained to be afraid of independent thinking. They are trained to run to the elders for help. Keep in mind the reasons behind this. If you ask too many difficult questions and she keeps going to the elders they will warn her to stop seeing you as you may be a potential apostate. In fact they strongly discourage relationships between JWs and non JWs. You may find they will start putting seeds of doubt in her mind about staying in a relationship with you.

  Another problem that you will find when trying to talk to her is that you tend to go around in circles. That is because the JW organisation (Watchtower Bible and Tract Society) use circular reasoning. Look it up and have a read about this method. I think you will find it quite enlightening.

  I don't want to come across harsh but you should be aware of what is going on behind the scenes.

  Good luck - Miss Peaches.
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  Buster

  You can't deal with her. Anything you say, no matter how true or logical, will only make her think that she doesn't grasp the deeper truths. I'm not kidding. I'ld bet she uses those exact words with the other dubbies. She won't ever come to the conclusion that she is wrong. She will only conclude that she doesn't understand why she is right.

  Let me ditto on the earlier post recommending Steven Hassan's book.

  Let me add that a nice seed to plant is an understanding of logical falacies. These are false logic often employed in JW rags. Talk to her, in a completely non-religious, non-arguementative, comfortable tone. Read together about the Strawman, whereby the arguer throws up an almost irrelevant and easy argument just for the sake of shooting it down. Learn about ad hominem attacks where the rebutter simply ignores the point at hand and attacks the presenter of an argument. There are others. The Watchtower bunk may a bit harder for her to ignore once she grasps the logical falacies they foist.

  Oh, and yeah, it won't work, so run.
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  Check_Your_Premises

  ONe of the most effective methods is to discuss OTHER cults. That is fair game. You can run down other religions all day to a dub.

  I actually just posted a link to a great website that has a video on the world wide church of God. They were (now reformed) a similar cult based on the "teachings" of "God's end time apostle" Herbert Armstrong. Here is a link to that thread. This video is the story of their reformation. It describes some remarkeable parallels to the jw cult.

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/94751/1.ashx

  Get this video and show it to her. Say stuff like, "Isn't it amazing that so many people think they are apart of the one true religion! Since they all can't be the one true religion, there obviously is a natural human need to beleive such a thing. And so many of those other groups use all sorts of threats and phobias to keep members from leaving. Can you believe that!!! I mean if it is the truth, why do they need to try to scare people into believing it and staying with it!!!!"

  When she says, "but we use Jehovah's name", tell her about the House of Yahweh. They claim the same thing. Do a google search on them for some laughs!

  Also theholdemans.com has a great list of one true churches. Just keep asking her about THOSE guys. Ask her why you shouldn't believe in them. They say they are the one true church.

  Or you could just run away!!! That would be my advice. You simply have no idea what a daunting task you are signing up for. We are talking years. Maybe decades.
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  Check_Your_Premises

  Oh, and yeah, it won't work, so run.

  Preach it brotha!!!

  Most of the folks who are trying to get people out of the org are doing so to save their families, marriages, children....

  ...not to get a chick with nice cans.

  We have to be here. We have to read about this incredibly stupid @%. We have to pretend that we are interested in this completely asinine "religion" so our loved ones will even talk to us. We have to spend mind numbing hours in boring meetings. We have to scour the web for that one article or fact that might finally "open their eyes". We have to sit there and take it while our loved ones put their relationship to this demonic, uncaring false prophet before we who love them with all your heart. We have to sit back and watch our loved ones turn into robots. We have to watch people we love, admire, and respect completely humiliate themselves by knocking on peoples door to spew fairy tales.

  We have to be here. You don't.

  Like I said dude, she can't be that hot.
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  jgnat

  She got involved because of her feelings. You won't get her out with logic. Here's a show-stopper I use with the "go to the elders" excuse.

  "I am not part of that religion, so they have no spiritual authority over me. I am not interested in what THEY think, I want to know what YOU think."