I RANG THEM!!!!!!

by Evanescence 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • Evanescence
    Evanescence

    Ok (still shaking from the scary experiance)

    I decided to ring the local Kingdom Hall and ask on their basic beliefs! ARRR sooo scary!!!!!

    Ok conversation (this is not exact just from memory)

    Me: Hello is this the Jehovah's Witness Convention?

    JW(lady voice)oh no we're not a convention

    Me: the hall? the Kingdom hall?

    JW: Oh yes yes, what is it?

    Me: Oh I was wondering, I am interested in different religions I just wanted to know what your doctrines are.

    JW: Our what?

    Me: Doctrines you know beliefs

    JW: oh oh ok! (excited voice)

    (JW Female calls out, "there is someone on the phone who wants to know our doctrines" Male jw voice "really? ok)

    JW (Male): Hello

    ME: Hello, I am interested in different religions and I just wanted to know what your doctrines are, you know beliefs.

    JW: Oh well we believe in a Paradise earth, did you know that we will live forever on a paradise earth? yes thats right and Jehovah will rule in his new Kingdom! Jehovah is going to make this world a paradise!

    Me: oh ok! (pretending to be interested)

    JW: Yes isn't that wonderful? The JW's believe everything that comes from the bible, if its not from the bible then we don't believe it the bible is like our text book! if you want to prove something prove it with the bible! all our beliefs come from the bible.

    Me: ok ()

    JW: Many other religions believe which is quite unfortunate believe that they have a soul and when they die will go to heaven! and unfortunatly the Muslims believe that if you die virgin you will be rewarded with 72 virgins!

    Me: Laughs lol! (thinking sick thoughts )

    JW: *Laughs*, yes! *laughs* thats true! unbelievable isn't it? *laughs* Yes but what they don't realise and what other religions don't realise is that we are to live on a paradise earth! Just like Adam and Eve did right from the beginning, Jehovah gave them paradise and with sin they turned away!

    Me: ok!

    JW: yeah! yeah! Do you let your children do what ever they want?

    Me: no comment ( IM 15!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! )

    JW: Well do you? *probebly thinking that i do! *

    Me: Oh uhhhmmm well no i don't (thinking of all the child "discipline" and all the control that goes on) No I guess not considering i'm a child myself! (not a mother dumb dumb! oh and I'm a virgin! oh and to add I rang you up using my mobile and may I add that I am with Virgin mobile! ) My parents don't let me do whatever I want You know, who knows what children can get up to today!

    JW: .... Yes Yes (slightly embarrest ) They can take drugs and get up to no good, you see a lot of parents fight and there is divorsion, children can get out of hand and be quite dis-obediant! Children run off. There is alot of terror in our world you see alot of violence and murder don't you?

    Me: ........ (here we go again! this is gonna lead to paradise earth again isn't it! )

    JW: Don't you?

    Me: Oh uhh (thinking that the world isn't that bad if you look at the positives you learn to look and see goodness) Well I don't really watch the news, I don't watch T.V

    JW: Yeah! there is so much violence going on! your like some other people who can't bare to watch the News because of all the violence...

    Me: (no I don't watch the News because it is so Booooooooooooooorrrrinnnngggggg!!!!!!!!! )

    JW: Well in our new System, our paradise is our new covenant with God, there will be no violence or terror we will live in happieness. Its quite unfortunate well I mean I don't know what your faith is, that other christians and religions believe that they are going to heaven

    Me: ( I happen to be one of those religions!!!!!!!!! )

    JW: It is sad some people committed suicide over this.

    Me: Oh thats sad... ( ARRRRRRRGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! just be glad with my CATHOLIC faith that I know how to be nice and patient with others! Oh and I was suicidal once myself! Due to Teenage depression and PEOPLE MEDDLING WITH MY MIND!! )

    JW: I know! exactly! you have a young voice, say are your parents together? well they are christians, Well about 70% of JWs were once Catholic and Prodestant I was a Roman Catholic once, my mother was a Catholic and my father was a Prodestant but we didn't quite gain enough satisfaction so we became Jehovah's Witnesses. What is your first name? you know your Christian name?

    Me: ....... (don't want to say my name! )

    JW: your first name what is it?

    Me: .... My name is Evanescence (typed evanescence in replacement of my real name but told him my real name)

    JW: Ok Evanescence, now I can talk to you more personally now that I know your name So yeah I beliefs are about this wonderful paradise earth and whatever is said in the bible, if its not in the bible then we don't do it!

    Me: Oh ok I've heard that you don't believe in the Trinity is that true?

    JW: Well the word was never mentioned in the bible....

    Me: (neither was the word "watchtower")

    JW: You see Jesus was the one that taught us the Lord's prayer, our father who art in heaven. its says our father, who is in heaven. Jesus isn't in heaven, Jesus prayed to Jehovah. Yes and as mentioned in Psalms (can't remember the verse) it states that god's name is Jehovah and the son is Jesus but the holy spirit doesn't exist. you see it doesn't have a name it is known as "Holy Spirit" it is known as Jehovah's active force who carries out Jehovah's will the trinity isn't a person it is a force the Holy Spirit does not exist. Its quite unfortunate that Christians believe in the Trinity it has been a traditional belief since the third centry christians. But there is no trinity.

    Me: ( don't be mean!!!! )

    JW: If you want to learn more about the Jehovah's witnesses then you can always come down to the Kingdom hall in (town)

    Me: lol my friend lives down the street from your Kingdom hall!

    JW: really? *laughs* wo you have a job?

    Me: No I'm a Student

    JW: A what?

    Me: Student! I rang up to learn more about Jehovah's Witness because i'm going to do an Oral presentation on Jehovah's Witnesses

    JW: OH OH student!! right! well do you have a drivers licence?

    Me: No I'm only 15

    JW: oh ok, well you can always come down to the Kingdom hall we will love to meet you! do you have a drivers licence? oh right no you don't your 15! well your parents could.... well I guess not.

    Me: I don't think they want to go

    Me: Does the Jehovah's Witness at your kingdom hall go out in Field service?

    JW: the what?

    Me: You know field service, door to door?

    JW: oh! field service yeah we do! as mentioned in Mathew 24: 21 we go door to door, I go door to door, we only ahve a short time left, we got to warn people about Armageddon! yes its coming soon did you know that?

    Me: No?

    JW: yes its coming soon! as it is said world terror marks the end of the system, Armageddon is coming! Well I love going door to door of cause there is a sacrifice, people can choose to listen to us, but most unfortunatly many choose not to beleive us, but that's ok! we won't shove religion down their throats or anything! people have the freedom to choose just like you have the freedom to choose to go to the Kingdom hall or not! we won't force them!

    Me: Ok its just I don't get any jw's come to my door! Its been a decade since they last came!!!

    JW: A DECADE!!!!!! WHAT THEY DON"T COME TO YOUR DOOR!!??????

    Me: Yeah! it was about a decade ago when I was only 3 my dad normally speaks to the jw's but one day he was out and my mum was having one of those bad migranes. The jw's came to the door, my mum wasn't being the nicest considering she had a migrane (don't blame he) the JW'S asked "oh where is your husband?" mum relied "oh he's not here" They never came back after that! I think they took what mum said the wrong way. thinking he has left or something

    JW: ok, well a DECADE???????? thats no good! thats no good indeed (can sence anger looks like I dobbed the jws in maybe I'll get some at my door this weekend! ) Well what is your address? I would like to come and talk to you

    Me: uhhm well i don't really want to give you my address i'm in (town) somewhere you can go and search for me if you want! I don't think my parents would be too happy if jw's came to the door because I rang them up!

    JW: ok fair enough. do you know of any local jw's? do you have any at your school?

    Me: well no actually I go to a Catholic school and I don't think there are any jw's there!

    jw: OH OH! ok no there wouldn't be! do you know of any local jws?

    Me: well there is one do you have a Jehovah's Witness named Mary? she lives accross the road from my school

    jw: well i don't think I know an in (town)

    Me: oh no the school I go to is in (different town)

    JW: oh ok well make it your business to maybe talk to her

    Me: uhhmm I don't know Mary doesn't like us (she also chases after students with knifes!)

    JW: *laughs* oh ok! well do you want me to ring you at all your number?

    Me: (my phone was on private number for a reason!!!!!!!!!!) no I don't really want to give my number

    JW: oh ok fair enough Uhhhmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmm uhhmmmm well you can come to the kingdom hall... oh wait you don't have a drivers licence... uhhmmmm don't know any local jws.... uhhhmmm? ?????????? call you? no no no, house! oh right! ?????? uhhmmm well Evanescence if you want to you can always ring up if you have any more questions! I loved talking to you! see its important to spread the news because Armageddon is coming! very very soon! see this is why i love field service and talking to you Evanescence! and sharing the wonderful news about Paradise earth! uhhmmmmm (really wants to find a way to contact me! ) remember you can always come to the kingdom hall! right no drivers licence!

    Me: well thanks for the help! Sorry to bother you

    JW: OH NO NO!! Jesus always spoke to people so don't worry I'm glad you rang! uhhhmmmm well remember to look out for some local jw's arrrmmm uhhmmm (more desperate to find a way to contact me! ) (gives up ) well Evanescence you can always ring back I will be glad to hear from you and you are always welcome to our kingdom hall and attend our meetings.

    Me: ok thankyou very much!

    JW: ok Evanescence remember you are always welcomed to our kingdom hall and feel free to ring back!

    Me : ok thanks bye.

    JW: bye bye (yay I think I might of converted somebody!)

    Me: ok that was scary!!!!

    The Guy was sooo nice though!!!!!! Darn he makes his religion sound sooooo good lol! like advertising sweet chocolate on T.V!

    THAT CONVERSATION COSTED ME $10.00!!!! great now I have to buy some more phone credit! I had $11 now I only have $1 honestly the guy yapped on and on!!!!

    Well what do you guys think? that conversation costed me $10!!!

    Evanescence * Now broke! need more phone credit!*

  • PaulJ
    PaulJ

    Well done! Yes, it does sound like a chocolate commercial, but so much of it is just a 'face' The things they believe are very appealing, but unfortunately without a lot of foundation.

    Good work tho, its good to see an external point of view on JW's!!!

  • Evanescence
    Evanescence

    lol thy guy seriously thought he was converting me! and I was interested in converting!

    I was being very kind and friendly lol and was acting interested in their 'paradise earth'

    I'm serious! I bet the JW I was talking to probebly got some brownie points on all the jw's who was earsdropping in the background!

    lol I didn't rebut anything! just said I was interested in them! I wonder if the guy was an elder?? he was sooooooooo nice! unbelievably nice!

    Now I can see how people can get sucked into their religion I felt like joining lol! ::sarcasm:: seriously tempting lol!

    When he was talking I was thinking like "the wafer center.... covered in sweet sweet caramel! throw in a few nuts and covered in rich, rich dairy milk, milk chocolate!!! *drools* (person takes bite from chocolate) MMMMMMMMMMMMMM yummy! I want some!

    I wonder if the jw guy is gonna walk around all proud! lol (proud that he robbed a 15 year old of her phone credit lmao! )

    Evanescence *flattered by too much kindness class *

  • lisavegas420
    lisavegas420

    lol@ Eva...you're so cute

    What's your next move? I bet you were talked about all night.

    Lisa

  • Evanescence
    Evanescence

    LMAO!!! I can imagine them talking about me! he he he he!

    I was being sooo nice and was pretending to agree with their beliefs cause I mainly rang up to learn a bit about them not to debate (don't think my phone credit could last long enough! ) I'm like "oh yeah!" (in the most friendly cheerful interested voice you could imagine! cause in person I tend to normally have this really cheerful voice lol!)

    The guy really really tried everything he could to find a way to contact me lol!

    I'd laugh if he was an elder! wooooo those jw's will cop it sweet about slacking off in field service (he sounded rather shocked when I told him it was a decade since they last went to my house!)

    Evanescence

  • Evanescence
    Evanescence
    What's your next move?

    buy some phone credit!

    *still can't get over losing $10 !!!! in ONE conversation!*

    Evanescence

  • DannyBloem
    DannyBloem

    This is something the Jw's are going to talk about in that local congregation.

    you know: they do not get that many calls of people who are interested. In all the years we had really few.
    You get calls of visiting brothers of other countries, calls not to bother me anymore please, etc.

    They know exactly how many times the visit each door (on average), so they must wonder what is going on.

    Danny.

  • Evanescence
    Evanescence

    I think I may of motivated them to go out on field service! (my town is probebly gonna murder me for this lol! )

    Evanescence

  • talesin
    talesin

    Well, that was a most enjoyable read. lol ... nice work!

    It was most likely an elder, as they usually list an elder in the phone book for contact (OF COURSE!). He is probably making calls to ensure that your town's 'territory' is covered thoroughly in the near future, so don't be surprised if they come calling soon.

    tal

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet

    Evanescence - I really enjoyed reading that - you are a very funny girl. It would have been cool if you could have said some of the stuff you have in brackets - but then may have rang alarm bells.

    You must be one of our youngest members - I never would have guessed from your posts - thought you were older.

    crumpet x

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