by gotcha 56 Replies latest social family
hello joyzabel (did you change your nick)...im not that great now...it's really been a long time......
thank you to all who have answered..im really a confused person right now...im just trying to see from a parent's point of view..i wonder why what's happening is so very much different from the responses i got.
it's hard when we hurt the people we love...sometimes it's better just to disappear and dont cause them too problems or shame
there's another option which i forgot...would you rather that she were:5. dead
What kind of choice is that??
Food for thought: Do you know how HIGH the incidence of suicide is among homosexuals who have no support system?? Approximately 1 in 3 teen suicides are gay/lesbian!! Who wants their child to be a damn statistic for ANY reason, particularly for one that could have been prevented with a little unconditional love and acceptance??
even if u were sure she was just destroying herself....would u still want her to live and continue making a mess out of her life?
Just my humble opinion but ...
It is her life to "make a mess" out of. Your job as her mother is to be there to help pick up the pieces.
hey gotcha *waves*
"hello joyzabel (did you change your nick)..." yes, it's me, joy2bfree. I'm so free now that I want to have a joyzabel influence on everyone and that means you too, sweetie.
You are a bright gal, I remember , so please go get some counseling like I said. It must be hard to not be a "good jw gal" and now having feelings that you feel is against society. Well, those feelings are your feelings and you have every right to them. Please get help to see that you are a worthy person, NO MATTER WHAT. If something bothers someone else, that is their problem.
It takes people a long, long time to ever get to that point in their life. If helps to get help, to reach that point sooner. Please go get help.
Love ya,
Joy
I would want my child to be happy no matter what that meant. You can't live your child's life for them. You can't make your child live their life how you want them too. You can guide them, show them right from wrong, and encourage them, but you also support them. You hope that you have given your child the tools to do the right things in life, and hope that they live a long and happy life. I have children and they are everything to me. Nothing means more to me. I want them to be happy. I know that they will make mistakes and I will always be there to support them. I hope to never have to bury one of my children.
I must concur with everyone else....I want my daughter to be happy, really happy and for that to happen, she has to find her way in life. My job is to support her at all costs and love her no matter what.
True, some decisions she will inevitably make will disappoint me, but I'll love her none the less!
SK
hello joyzabel (did you change your nick)...im not that great now...it's really been a long time......thank you to all who have answered..im really a confused person right now...im just trying to see from a parent's point of view..i wonder why what's happening is so very much different from the responses i got.
it's hard when we hurt the people we love...sometimes it's better just to disappear and dont cause them too problems or shame
Hmmm ... with that said, I see now. My advice to the parent stands, of course.
And my advice to the daughter ... it is hard when we hurt the people we love. But sometimes that is entirely out of our control - people can be hurt by our actions because of how they choose to respond to those actions. That doesn't mean we are the one in the wrong. This daughter - she needs to be true to herself, true to her heart - in order to ever be truly happy. There are some wonderful counselors and support groups to help with this very issue. As a matter of fact I recently volunteered to be the Facilitator for a Gay/Les/Bi/TG/Ques Youth Group. This daughter ... she doesn't have to be alone in this. And it can work out. Dead is never a solution (a permanent solution to a temporary problem, remember that).
PM me anytime if you'd like to talk more.
joyyyyyyyyyy...it's good to hear from you..thanks.problems never seem to end..some moments of happiness in exchange for more moments of sadness and sorrow..why is life like this...it just worsens...better off ..it's harder when someone makes u feel like they own you..only way to prove that my life is mine is i have the power to take it.
Gotcha i now you are hurting and i wish i could help : (
Others here have said it but ultimately regardless of what we as mother's want, our children WILL live their own lives and choose their own paths. I, like everyone else here, want my kids to make themselves happy and to be true to themselves. If that means making choices I don't agree with so be it. It is their life, not mine. I'm going through a little bit of that now with my oldest who is graduating high school. I suspect it won't all be peaches and cream for the next few years but I have every confidence she will find her own way. I have raised them to think for themselves.
I guess growing up a Witness discouraged independent thinking. That's a crime, however all any of us can do is look towards changing the future, the past is by definition - history.
Take care and if you need to talk, do consider seeing a real therapist. It is so helpful to talk with a person who is non-judgemental, keeps your discussion in confidence AND is trained to help you find your answers.
