Why did the chicken cross the road?

by kj 12 Replies latest social humour

  • kj
    kj

    > So Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
    >
    > GEORGE W BUSH
    >
    > We don't really care why the chicken crossed the
    > road. We just want to know
    > if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
    > Our side of the road is
    > the right side of the road and the chicken is either
    > against us or for us.
    > There is no middle ground for any chicken.
    >
    > COLIN POWELL
    >
    > Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see
    > the satellite image of
    > the chicken crossing the road.
    >
    > DONALD RUMSFELD
    >
    > I have known about the chicken crossing the road for
    > several months. I was
    > investigating why the chicken moved but didn't feel
    > it was necessary to
    > alert anyone.
    >
    > HANS BLIX
    >
    > We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we
    > have not yet been
    > allowed to have access to the other side of the
    > road.
    >
    > JOHN KERRY
    >
    > Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I
    > am now against it!
    >
    > RALPH NADER
    >
    > The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road
    > had been polluted by
    > unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not
    > reach the unspoiled habitat
    > on the other side of the road because it was crushed
    > by the wheels of a
    > gas-guzzling SUV.
    >
    > PAT BUCHANAN
    >
    > To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.
    >
    > RUSH LIMBAUGH
    >
    > I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
    > I'll bet it was getting a
    > government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet
    > that somebody out there is
    > already forming a support group to help chickens
    > with crossing-the-road
    > syndrome. Can you believe this?How much more of this
    > can real Americans
    > take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their
    > tax dollars. And when I
    > say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money
    > the government took
    > from you to build road for chickens to cross.
    >
    > MARTHA STEWART
    >
    > No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
    > was going. I had a
    > standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my
    > eggs when the price dropped
    > to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
    > inside information.
    >
    > DR SEUSS
    >
    > Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with
    > a toad? Yes, the
    > chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've
    > not been told.
    >
    > ERNEST HEMINGWAY
    >
    > To die in the rain. Alone.
    >
    > MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
    >
    > I envision a world where all chickens will be free
    > to cross roads without
    > having their motives called into question.
    >
    > GRANDPA
    >
    > In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
    > road. Somebody told us
    > the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
    > enough.
    >
    > BARBARA WALTERS
    >
    > Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
    > listening to the
    > chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
    > story of how it
    > experienced a serious case of molting, and went on
    > to accomplish its life
    > long dream of crossing the road.
    >
    > JOHN LENNON
    >
    > Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
    > together -- in peace.
    >
    > ARISTOTLE
    >
    > It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
    >
    > KARL MARX
    >
    > It was a historic inevitability.
    >
    > CAPTAIN KIRK
    >
    > To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
    >
    > SIGMOND FREUD
    >
    > The fact that you are at all concerned that the
    > chicken crossed the road
    > reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
    >
    > BILL GATES
    >
    > I have just witnessed eChicken2004, which will not
    > only cross roads, but
    > will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
    > balance your checkbook...
    > and Internet Explorer is an integral part of
    > eChicken.
    >
    > ALBERT EINSTEIN
    >
    > Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
    > road move beneath the
    > chicken?
    >
    > BILL CLINTON
    >
    > I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
    > your definition of
    > chicken?
    >
    > AL GORE
    >
    > That was my chicken! I invented the chicken.
    >
    > COLONEL SANDERS
    >
    > Did I miss one?

  • sleepy
    sleepy

    FRED FRANZ Because it fullfills the 70 years of desolation , and represents the great whore babylon the great fleaing to her figurative mother Satans organisation on earth , situated across the road from Brooklyn bethal.

  • kj
    kj

    LOL!!!

  • Neo
    Neo

    PIONEER DUB: To get more time to put in the report slip.

    BY AWAKE! CORRESPONDENT IN KENYA: To join the other mammals.

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    To get to the other side?

  • Neo
    Neo
  • Neo
    Neo
  • Neo
    Neo

    SCHOLAR: The chicken is not reliabel because she has no academic qualifications and is simply rehashing the behaviour of earlier chickens on raod-crossing. Further, the Chicken Hipotesys has not been peeer reviewed in a scholarly journels and thus is deemed a simply piece of propeganda. Thus far her so-called crossing off an road hasnot been referencd by scholars working in the alivestock field beccause there is not agreement concerning teh dates for the later period of animmal imigration history. In adittion there is pernitent artcles on this subject in NIDCPRNTT, Vol.105 p.3254 and TQXLMKZTT, p. 1839. You will clearly see inthe appented bibliogrphies articlez in the academic field who deal with this subject

    scholar

    BS Studies in Religion

  • Odrade
    Odrade

    Groucho Marx: to prove to the possums it could be done?

    never mind. haha

  • Fire Dragon
    Fire Dragon

    To get away from his dentist. - Fozzie Muppet

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit