Is this a place for children?

by xenawarrior 188 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mac
    Mac
    It does raise the question, why or how does a religiously focussed discussion board end up being a venue more focussed on parties and sexual romps/flirtations.

    Er,.........cuz I flirt and romp religiously??

    mac

  • xenawarrior
    xenawarrior

    Uzzah:

    I wasn't in chat at the time, but if a room full of adults cannot show some empathy to a 12 (or 14 or 16 year old) who is obviously posting here for a reason, and give them a listening ear of some support (regardless of the time of day) I simply do not understand the adults in that situation.

    You say these teens can go make their own forum. That could be turned around, to say why can't the afdults who want a social forum create their own chat area for that? It sounds to me like Utopian's child wanted to use a chatroom advertized on a support board for support. How dare she

    Uzzah: You are right- you weren't there. The child in question was NOT in there asking for empathy or support- she was in there in a "social" way. Noone in the room even knew her age. She wasn't asking for support about her situation- I can guarantee you IF she had told us she was 12 and she was asking for support, she would have received it. She was not wanting to use a chatroom advertised on a support board- FOR SUPPORT. I am a bit irritated that you are assuming that there is a lack of empathy on my part because I feel so strongly about this. You are wrong.

    And the adults do have a chat room already.

    XW

  • xenawarrior
    xenawarrior

    And another thing:

    Being on this board- posting. If a 12 year old or 14 year old etc starts posting in the threads on this board- do they have the emotional maturity to be able to handle it? Do they have the knowledge to back them up?

    Picture this- A 12 year old child posts to a thread on this board and it is not clear that she/he is 12 and runs smack dab into Farkel !! That is nothing against Farkel- I love the guy- but is a 12 year old really capable of handling themselves in that kind of situation? Hell, I can't even do it !!!

    If this 12 year old was leveled to bawling based on the benign situation in the chatroom, how will they deal with responses to their posts here ? Are they emotionally mature enough for that? Do we need to preface our posts with our ages so folks responding will know?

    Maybe there could be a section for the kids to talk about stuff. And a chat room for them. And the adults who wish to can go there and offer their support, information and suggestions can feel free to do so.

    XW

  • pr_capone
    pr_capone

    I was in the chat room at that time. It strikes me odd though that after she mentioned that ALL the people she once knew, loved, and considered friends, she was still asked to leave.

    Maybee I see it in a different light than others here simply because I am in the same boat as she is. Everyone that I considered to be my friend while growing up were JW's. When I left, everyone left me. I felt quite alone even though some family would still talk to me. I found this forum and immediately jumped in feet first, not looking for support but looking for friends. Just people to talk to that knew where I was comming from.

    When I was 12 years old I acted and though like a 20 year old. Now that I am 22 and out of the borg I act like I am 7. Someones maturity, or value in a forum cannot be appraised only on their age.

    I for one enjoyed talking with her and hope that Vash as well as UR (one of the first people to welcome me to the forum) come back somday soon.

    BTW, I did know her age.

    Kansas District Overbeer

    P.S. Comments such as "Its not my turn to babysit" certainly wouldnt make feel like I would recieve support if I were to ask for it.

  • scootergirl
    scootergirl

    7of9.........you handled this perfect in the chatroom. I applaude you! I wish I could remember word for word what you said.......you're concerned was so genuine and I was impressed.

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    Picture this- A 12 year old child posts to a thread on this board and it is not clear that she/he is 12 and runs smack dab into Farkel !! That is nothing against Farkel- I love the guy- but is a 12 year old really capable of handling themselves in that kind of situation? Hell, I can't even do it !!!

    What a load of old womans bollocks Xena!

    Farkel is great with kids. (and my girls at 15 would have given the big softy at least as much as they got .. they certainly wouldn't have been traumatised by some grumpy ol' coot slinging a few reality bites their way)

    ooops lost this .. second try (lost a few thousand words! bugger!)....oh well, where was i...

    At 17 years of age my youngest daughter took one look at us internut apostates , mumbled something unflattering and never looked our way again. You old ladies want we should wrap our kids in cotton wool to protect the from reality? Do you censorshipers really imagine kids that at any Kingdom Hall on any Sunday hear all about harlots and beastiality and men who lay with men and oral sex etc.... are going to be some how damaged by typing and being typed at here?

    The faliscy of your claimn is born out by the very post you hyperlinked to. The young lady got a wonderful welcome and what she posted about Galleleo (her spelling's better than mine) really was worthwhile. More power to the young'ns I say!

    .At 7 and 8 i told my girls "the facts of life". Adults are usually much more upset at the "inappropriate use of language", images etc.. than are children (one reason they find it attractive)

    I don't know how many happy, well adjusted kids you've raised Xena but my girls are living proof that education and contact with people of all ages from an early age is a good thing.

    unclebruce who trusts simon.

  • not interested
    not interested

    well damnit, this is the 3rd time ive tried to post to this thread if it dont work this time im throwing this damn macine out the window,

    ill start off saying that im not a parent and may never be, but i have yong nephews and dated a gal with kids, and they find a way to get into places they arent supposed to be, they seem to know more about computers and chata rooms than adults do,

    IMO, chat rooms are no place for children, I dont care what age or maturity level they are, even in kids only chat rooms, perverts can get in!!

    There are things that go on in chat rooms and discussion boards that kids need not hear, witness related or not.

    Its almost impossible to monitor children, they have a way of finding places they arent supposed to be and even under adult supervisoin they still manage to find trouble, Im a prime exmple of this.

    A young witness that is trying to leave the ORG. definatly needs support and people to talk to but a web site probably isnt the place (imo)

    To say that the adults that use the forum should "tone it down" is a big request, we are adults and are responcible for our own actions, whereas the parents of children that use this forum are responcilbe to know what is talked about, and what goes on here before thier children get hurt,upset,bewildered,or whatever may happen to them.

    personaly, and again totaly IMO, if i had children, they wouldnt be allowed here, or anyother website that had a chat room, but knowing me, my children would find it anyway,

    last but not least if i was a parent that has left the BORG i would be the support for my children not a website,

  • pr_capone
    pr_capone

    IMO, chat rooms are no place for children, I dont care what age or maturity level they are, even in kids only chat rooms, perverts can get in!!

    There are things that go on in chat rooms and discussion boards that kids need not hear, witness related or not.

    Its almost impossible to monitor children, they have a way of finding places they arent supposed to be and even under adult supervisoin they still manage to find trouble, Im a prime exmple of this.

    A young witness that is trying to leave the ORG. definatly needs support and people to talk to but a web site probably isnt the place (imo)

    To say that the adults that use the forum should "tone it down" is a big request, we are adults and are responcible for our own actions, whereas the parents of children that use this forum are responcilbe to know what is talked about, and what goes on here before thier children get hurt,upset,bewildered,or whatever may happen to them.

    personaly, and again totaly IMO, if i had children, they wouldnt be allowed here, or anyother website that had a chat room, but knowing me, my children would find it anyway,

    last but not least if i was a parent that has left the BORG i would be the support for my children not a website,

    Should it be Simon's responsibility to monitor who uses the forum then? Or should it be the responsibility of the PARENT to monitor what their kids look at on the internet. It was obvious that Vash had parental consent to be here. So should Vash not be welcomed here simply because her age? Even though she had mamma's permission?

    Kansas District Overbeer

  • xenawarrior
    xenawarrior

    Dear Uncle Bruce:

    Yes, first of all I have a 14 year old who is happy and quite well adjusted, thank you. She has been around people from all walks of life and all ages since she was a baby. I also started talking to her about "the facts of life" at around 4 and have continued talking to her about it depending on her age at the time. She is also quite mature for her age. Does that mean that I want her in a chat room with adults? Nope. Does that make me an "old woman"? Perhaps in your estimation- no matter to me.

    Farkel is great with kids. (and my girls at 15 would have given the big softy at least as much as they got .. they certainly wouldn't have been traumatised by some grumpy ol' coot slinging a few reality bites their way)

    You missed my point Uncle Bruce. I know Farkel is great with kids. I didn't say he wasn't. I happen to like Farkel- I wasn't dissing him. The point I was making is that if a child is posting, it may not be apparant that they are a child and the response they may get may be one that they may not be prepared to handle. Adults on this board need to be thick skinned- it's just the way it is. If this child was so greatly and adversaly affected by what was happening in the chat room, there is no reason for me to expect that she'd be able to handle someone posting actual harshness towards her in a post because they don't know her age.

    The faliscy of your claimn is born out by the very post you hyperlinked to. The young lady got a wonderful welcome and what she posted about Galleleo (her spelling's better than mine) really was worthwhile. More power to the young'ns I say!

    There is no fallacy in my claim Uncle Bruce. It's my opinion and I'm entitled to it. The post I linked to was to point out how old she was. I had no problem with that post at all. And I have no problem with the occasional posting by children on this board in the same manner. What I have a problem with is active participation by them in a realm they may not be ready for and as adults I don't believe it's our responsible to walk on eggshells because of their presence. Her post was great !! Big Tex's daughter's post was great !!! THAT is not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about active involvement in the adult realm of this board and IN MY OPINION that includes being actively involved in the chat room.

    This child did not enter the chat room and say "Hi, I'm 12 years old and I am struggling with a few things and could really use some adults to talk to about it" She was there in a completely different way.

    There are predators on the internet, Uncle Bruce. There are folks who prey on adults on this and other boards. Do you know ALL of the people who post here? Do you know they are all safe for a child to be unsupervised in the chat room with? Would you want your child to be in the chat room with adults you don't know?

    education and contact with people of all ages from an early age is a good thing.

    I agree with you 100% and that is exactly the way my daughter is being raised. The fact that I have a problem with this does not conclude that I think anything else.

    XW

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    I'm a bit of a snob about some things NI so your "if i had children" just doesn't work for me.

    I had fancy ideas about bringing up kids too. Till i had 'em. They're little humans i tell ya!

    OK I'll concede you a half-point about the chatroom alright?

    unclebruce

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