The Glory Days Are Over

by Farkel 83 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • SYN
    SYN

    Farkel: Of course pineapple on Pizza is Bible Based (TM)! Fish, on the other hand, is not! Fish was mentioned by Jesus, so it must be bad! Virtually everything mentioned in the Bible is bad. In fact, I am beginning to suspect that certain non-pineapple-on-pizza-loving people on this site are possibly members of the Evil Fish-On-My-Pizza-And-No-Pineapple Class! This class is similiar to the Jehosophat Class, but there the similiarity ends!

    And I have Scriptural Proof (TM) for my assertions too! Fish can only be "unevenly yoked" with pizza dough! Oh the horror! Pineapple, on the other hand, is similiar to the palm fronds that people put under the feet of Jesus' donkey and waved around and stuff when he entered Jerusalem, so it must be OK to put it on Pizza!

    Only a Spiritually Weak (TM) person would consider putting a sea creature on their pizza! Whereas juicy, sweet pineapple segments are the perfect accompaniment for a delicious, freshly baked pizza!

  • SYN
    SYN

    Question: How do you know that you're an Apostate?
    Answer: You consider arguing about the relationship between various Pizza toppings and Biblical Prophecy on an ExJW website "fun"!

  • UnDisfellowshipped
    UnDisfellowshipped

    Here is a Prophecy about the Watchtower's DOWNFALL (along with all the other EVIL RELIGIONS):

    Revelation 18:1: After these things, I saw another angel coming down out of the sky, having great authority. The Earth was illuminated with his glory.
    Revelation 18:2: He cried with a mighty voice, saying, "Fallen, fallen is Babylon the Great, and she has become a habitation of demons, a prison of every unclean spirit, and a prison of every unclean and hateful bird! (SOUNDS LIKE THE SOCIETY'S CURRENT CONDITION, EH?)
    Revelation 18:3: For all the nations have drunk of the wine of the wrath of her sexual immorality, the Kings of the Earth committed sexual immorality with her, and the merchants of the Earth grew rich from the abundance of her luxury." (HMMM, TALKING ABOUT THE WTS AFFAIR WITH THE UN AND THE NAVY?)
    Revelation 18:4: I heard another voice from Heaven, saying, "Come out of her, my people, that you have no participation in her sins, and that you don't receive of her plagues,
    Revelation 18:5: for her sins have reached to the sky, and God has remembered her iniquities. (AMEN!)
    Revelation 18:6: Return to her just as she returned, and repay her double as she did, and according to her works. In the cup which she mixed, mix to her double. (DOUBLE AMEN!)
    Revelation 18:7: However much she glorified herself, and grew wanton, so much give her of torment and mourning. For she says in her heart, 'I sit a queen, and am no widow, and will in no way see mourning.' (SOUNDS JUST LIKE 'EM!)
    Revelation 18:8: Therefore in one day her plagues will come: death, mourning, and famine; and she will be utterly burned with fire; for the Lord God who has judged her is strong. (PRAISE GOD!)
    Revelation 18:9: The Kings of the Earth, who committed sexual immorality and lived wantonly with her, will weep and wail over her, when they look at the smoke of her burning,
    Revelation 18:10: standing far away for the fear of her torment, saying, 'Woe, woe, the Great City, Babylon, the Strong City! For your judgment has come in one hour.'
    Revelation 18:11: The merchants of the Earth weep and mourn over her, for no one buys their merchandise any more; (All that PAPER!)
    Revelation 18:12: merchandise of gold, silver, precious stones, pearls, fine linen, purple, silk, scarlet, all expensive wood, every vessel of ivory, every vessel made of most precious wood, and of brass, and iron, and marble;
    Revelation 18:13: and cinnamon, incense, perfume, frankincense, wine, olive oil, fine flour, wheat, sheep, horses, chariots, bodies, and people's souls (EXACTLY!).
    Revelation 18:14: The fruits which your soul lusted after have been lost to you, and all things that were dainty and sumptuous have perished from you, and you will find them no more at all.
    Revelation 18:15: The merchants of these things, who were made rich by her, will stand far away for the fear of her torment, weeping and mourning;
    Revelation 18:16: saying, 'Woe, woe, the Great City, she who was dressed in fine linen, purple, and scarlet, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls!
    Revelation 18:17: For in an hour such great riches are made desolate.' Every shipmaster, and everyone who sails anywhere, and mariners, and as many as gain their living by sea, stood far away,
    Revelation 18:18: and cried out as they looked at the smoke of her burning, saying, 'What is like the Great City?'
    Revelation 18:19: They cast dust on their heads, and cried, weeping and mourning, saying, 'Woe, woe, the Great City, in which all who had their ships in the sea were made rich by reason of her great wealth!' For in one hour is she made desolate.
    Revelation 18:20: Rejoice over her, O Heaven, you Saints, Apostles, and Prophets; for God has judged your judgment on her."
    Revelation 18:21: A mighty angel took up a stone like a great millstone and cast it into the sea, saying, "Thus with violence will Babylon, the Great City, be thrown down, and will be found no more at all. (HEY, REMEMBER MATTHEW 18:6? THE MILLSTONES ARE USED FOR PEOPLE WHO STUMBLE CHILDREN!)
    Revelation 18:22: The voice of harpists, minstrels, flute players, and trumpeters will be heard no more at all in you. No craftsman, of whatever craft, will be found any more at all in you. The sound of a mill will be heard no more at all in you.
    Revelation 18:23: The light of a lamp will shine no more at all in you. The voice of the bridegroom and of the bride will be heard no more at all in you; for your merchants were the Princes of the Earth; for with your sorcery all the nations were deceived.
    Revelation 18:24: In her was found the blood of Prophets and of Saints, and of all who have been slain on the Earth." (ALL WHO HAVE DIED BECAUSE OF THEIR BLOOD POLICIES, CHILD ABUSE POLICIES, RAPE POLICIES, ALTERNATIVE MILITARY SERVICE POLICIES, ORGAN TRANSPLANT POLICIES, VACCINATION POLICIES, and ALL THEIR OTHER WICKEDNESS!)

    So what do you think about this?

    By the way, GREAT THREAD Farkel and everyone! :-)

  • Xena
    Xena

    SYN: Poor misguided SYN....fish were part of a MIRACLE....pizza is considered a MIRACLE food by some...ergo

    fish + pizza = the manna of the "new" generation.

    Pineapple on the other hand contains acid...and can cause yeast infections (I am sure this is true...just don't ask me to prove it)...yeast as we know is considered EVIL....therefore

    pineapple + pizza = the food of the "evil" slave class.

    Only an apostate of apostates would ever consider putting pineapple on pizza...I believe in the middle ages they burned people for doing this...and I must say, althought I am considered by most to be a fair, rational and moderate person....THEY DESERVED IT!

    BTW: long, thick and just a little but not TO bendy...just don't wanna break anything during..you know...a crutial moment!

  • Reborn2002
    Reborn2002

    FOR THE RECORD, I LOVE PINEAPPLE ON MY PIZZA!

    BURN ME AT THE STAKE! BURN ME I SAY!!!

  • Xena
    Xena

    <---striking match....*sigh* no I just can't do it....he is to darn good looking...would be a waste of a perfectly good man....even if he is a pineapple pizza eating one....

  • Derrick
    Derrick

    Hi Farkel,

    Nice to see you again. I disagree with you on this one.

    The glory days have just begun.

    Give the reformed Society another 50 years and she will pass the Mormon church in numbers.

    Give the reformed Society another 150 years and she will start to resemble a modern equivalent of Catholocism with its illustrious Vatican (the antitype of Bethel). Brooklyn, New York might very well be a tourist destination similar to Vatican City, Rome.

    One of these days, I even suspect, another Pastor Russell will again declare from a megaphone on his modern transport vehicle, whatever shape it may take in the future, that religion is a snare and a racket, and condemn "the elders of Christendom."

    Derrick

  • Xena
    Xena

    You speak of a "reformed" society...in what ways do you think they will reform?

    I can't help but wonder what new light they will have to get to lull people into believing the new system is STILL just around the corner! They will need to get more light on the generation issue for sure!

  • scuba99
    scuba99

    Perhaps the apparent decline of the WTS is just an example of " the love of the greater number cooling off" and a prime example of how deep we are in the time of the end.

    BTW.... Really...pineapple has no business being anywhere near a pizza!=)

    ls

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    Derrick,

    : The glory days have just begun.

    That would be fine with me. As you've seen me say over the last half-decade, "When the society stops its current shunning practice, I will quietly retire and let them teach whatever else they want without speaking out about it."

    If they didn't ruin families and marriage with their shunning, then just about everything would be a matter of conscience for their members. That being the case, I wouldn't care if they had a jillion end-time prophecies that failed, and wouldn't care if they continued to lie as much as they lie now. Smart people would just leave and not be hurt for merely leaving.

    It ain't gonna happen though, Derrick despite your supreme optimism. They live and feed on control. Take that away and they have nothing but air. Pompous, windbagging air is all they've ever sold.

    Farkel

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