Some Single Sisters' Problems with Brothers

by friday77 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • friday77
    friday77

    First of all, I'm a newbie to this site, so I hope that there will be some response to my thread on this particular topic (which I have plenty to relate about).

    I wonder why some single (and a few married) brothers in the org have shown a great deal of disrespect for single sisters? I am bringing this issue up because not only myself but also my sisters [I have four (4) other in my immediate family] along with 3 of my cousins (who have been dedicated and baptized since adolescent age) plus my own close girlfriends have experienced being gossiped/slandered by a host of brothers who think that they are "all that" and Jah's gift to women on planet Earth! As a matter fact, when one brother in particular [whose uncle is an elder, brother was a regular pioneer/temporary worker at Bethel and cousin was a Ministerial Servant] at a nicely-populated gathering saw myself, two (2) of four sisters, one of cousins and a few of my close friends being approached as well as introduced to a number of handsome, well-dressed brothers to us via two (2) of the family members whom hosted the event. That stupid *** brother--if you or anyone can call him that--ran over to two of the brothers and whispered some no doubt total lies (i.e.: "yo, man, you can do better than this! Let me tell you all the real deal about these chicks!!", etc.) I am really sick and tired of the way these bros are able to get by with this behavior to the point whereby and whereas they are still being reverred for being males no matter what they do and sisters are being treated by all persons (brothers and sisters) like dirt plus less than zero!

    Has anyone experienced similar situations or feel the same way? (Due to this and many other similar situations, some of my siblings, relatives and friends are delinquent in addition to being inactive in the faith.)

    Hoping to hear from someone soon on this subject,

    friday77

  • loosie
    loosie

    The penis rules that cult

  • Scarred for life
    Scarred for life

    Loosie is absolutely right. You need to get out now. I don't know how old you are but you need to get out and make something of your life. Travel, go to school, meet new people (males and females). Learn about the world outside of the Kingdom Hall. The attitude is not going to change. You are dirt and less than zero in the JW world. Men in the WBTS love the power that they have and use it against the women. Leave now while you are young and single. You will not regret it. I never have.

  • penny2
    penny2

    Hello friday77, welcome to JWn!

    There are many issues relating to women in the organisation. It's not just isolated to the young single ones either.

    In the situation you've mentioned, I think these young boys just don't know how to behave. And they are not given the opportunity to get to know young girls as friends and equals.

    They are bound to have trouble relating to women outside the congregation as well (such as in the workplace and in society generally).

    penny

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    True that, Loosie.

    Welcome friday77 !

    I wonder why some single (and a few married) brothers in the org have shown a great deal of disrespect for single sisters?

    As a single "brother" I have to thank you for saying "some". I've known enough single, jerkwad "brothers" that I wouldn't have been surprised if you had said "all". And I've known more than a few married brothers that have been disrespectful, they're usually more careful about expressing it.

    I'm sorry for the way you've been treated. It's nothing new for the JWs, indeed it isn't new for many "Christian" religions to keep women "in their place". And the seeing-someone, dating, and courtship proceedings are such fertile group for gossip in dubland, the singles get watched under a microscope.

    Of course people vary greatly, and I don't personally know the brother. But he seems like some that I've known. I'd assume that as a single bro, he's likely been told that he is "all that". And he's probably had the experience of going places and the single sisters would flock to him. But once they get to know him, they split. Or maybe they're girls that are just looking for anything with a pulse, and he splits. So, he decides that all single sisters are fickle. And of course, you sisters are crazy for not swooning over him at that gathering instead of looking at those other brothers.

    Any other questions you'd like to direct at a single "brother"?

    B the X

  • Scott77
    Scott77

    friday77,

    The WTS is a male-dominated societal institution and dominance over the 'weaker sex' runs deeper in the rank and files of the Dubs males. I have seem some JW elders and ministerial servants who are so rude, uncaring, cold-hearted- a far cry from the fruits of the holy spirit they claim to posses. This brings up a partnent question: Should we really give double honors to those who lead among us?

    Scott77

  • Tired of the Hypocrisy
    Tired of the Hypocrisy

    Welcome to the board. The jw's put on like they are so different from the world. fact is they are just as much a reflection of their local community as any other douchebag on the street.

  • no more kool aid
    no more kool aid

    I felt that way, and I was a married sister. Here I ran a home, took care of a family, had a professional career with people who actually answer to me and I am expected to go along with every hair brained idea that the janitor overseer came up with. Didn't you love it when some man had to dictate the menu and the orderliness of processes like food service at a quick build. Sorry for the rant. NMKA

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Welcome to JWN friday77! Word of advice; RUN, don't walk away from this cult!!!!!! If you hang around long enough to marry one of these jerks, you'll get a whole lot more than your feelings hurt. JW men who choose to beat and terrorize their wives do so with impunity, while the women are advised to be better wives and wait on Jehovah. Listen to the voice of experience, please.

  • friday77
    friday77

    Thank you everyone (loosie, scarred for life, penny2, B the X, scott77, TOTH, and no more kool aid) for your responses along with the warm welcome!! My friends and family members (both jws and nws) have mentioned on more than one occasion how this is mysoginism (I'm not sure of the spelling of this word); and that by displaying this type of attitude can actually become a stumbling block to others (newbies, in particular) in the org. Unfortunately, actions such as these are being tolerated.

    Furthermore, although we are all imperfect, I know for a fact that a great of nws (some who have studied in the past) and have kin in the org made mentioned that they themselves would not put up with this garbage--as some of the rank and file does and tells some of us to continue to do so! [P.S.: One of my co-wkr's, who was an ex-study, said that her step-son almost punched a bro in the back for disrespecting his stepsister, who was also studying and ceased after a short time a number of years ago.]

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