They make me Sick!!

wary

It makes s me sick that the Witnesses have such a hold over people

I’ve told my wife and shown her all the crap about the society but she still insists ongoing to meetings. She’s off again this afternoon and taking the kids.

The thing is, I have wasted enough of my life sitting in those boring meetings to last a life time. I cannot even face going with them.

So my family is split up again because they still have a grip on her. It makes me mad!

I realize probably everyone on this board has had to deal with this in some way. I wish there was something I could say or do that would flip the switch in her mind that is controlled by them.

wary

digderidoo

It may be a better idea to show her one or two things at first, or even just hint at them. If you show her lots of info the JW mindset just kicks in and tars everything as apostate lies.

Paul

Quotes

We all wish we could flip that switch and help our friends and family out of their zombie-like following.

But for most people, there is no switch. A better analogy would be a block of ice: it takes time to melt. If left out in the noonday sun, it could melt quickly. If kept wrapped up in the dark, it might never melt. If a new layer of cold water is applied every Tuesday/Thursday/Sunday, it could actually grow bigger.

At the middle of that ice: freedom, self-direction, responsibility.

It could take time. It could take a few months. It could take forever.

Personally, I know of only one case wherein a spouse was able to "flip a switch" with their JW spouse, by asking:

"do you care about truth? does it matter if something is true? what would make you not believe? how do you determine whats tru?"

But that particular case involved two very smart, rational people. It is probably an exceptional case.

I share your frustration. Best of luck. Be strong.

~Q

Scarred for life

I haven't been in your exact situation but you have my complete sympathy. I wish you luck. Stay strong. Keep posting.

Joe Grundy

03:18:16

I speak as one who never was (thank ****) a JW, so please feel free to disregard my opinion.

But you may be better off to view it as a 'volume control' which you may be able to progressively 'turn down' rather than an 'on/off' switch.

Just a thought.

Regards.

PanzerZauberei

I am in the same boat and I sympathize with you. At times I feel like I am making progress, then all of a sudden she is all gung-ho and feeling guilty she misses so many meetings. Her dad is an uber JW and a really sincere person. She is also terrified of not having him in her corner. He shunned her before when she was d/f long ago and she learned her lesson real well. It is such a shame.

wary

Its like the Catholics doing some kind of penance to salve the conscience.

Show up and make an appearance and all is well.

You are all right. It is like trying to melt ice or turn the volume down rather than flipping a switch.

It was gradual with myself, but for me it was the blood issue, once I realized what a farce the teaching was, I was hungry to disocver what other crap I had been fed.

Thanks

wary

yknot

Time ..... it takes time...

My non-jw hubby had to wait 12 years and for me to stumble onto this site by accident before much of the stronghold was broken.

I agree a little at a time is better, she has to make her own mind up.

Why not create little non religious 'what is your opinion' exercises to help into more 'independent thinking'.

Praying for yall

passwordprotected

Love your wife, love your kids, be patient and give her space. The more you rant and rave against the WTS, the more she'll see it as persecution and thus confirmation that she's right and you're from the devil. Seriously.

lisavegas420

I'm wonder if offering her a better deal than boring meetings would work.

as in, "Look honey, I got us movie/theater tickets for tonight." Or look, "I made dinner and set the table for a candle lit dinner at (meeting start time)"

or "let's let tonight be family game night."

just a thought. the brain washed, thought controlled people make me sick too.

Good luck.

lisa

They make me Sick!!

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