Posts by FayeDunaway

35

Hey! Wanted to say Hi!

by Miss Worldly in

jw
friends

hey!

i've been hanging around her for a while.

this is the third attempt at my 'hello'.

FayeDunaway

Hi miss Worldly!!

Does anyone remember that old MasterCard commercial??

MASTERCARD! International. So WORLDLY, So WELCOME.

miss worldly, you are so worldly and so welcome :)

112

Did an EX-JW wake you up to TTATT or did you put the effort to wake up yourself?

by John Aquila in

how many of us were woken up by some apostate yelling false prophets at a convention?.

how many of us were woken up by someone holding a sign and yelling, what happened to 1975.

how many of us were coerced to investigate the wt because some ex-jw pulled up a bunch of old watchtowers magazines and told us to read the false predictions?.

My first experience with anti cult views was probably field service. We went out in service a LOT. We lived among a very educated population. Many of those people liked to get in long discussions about philosophical/theological issues, often for their own entertainment I think, and I still remember many of the conversations. It's interesting, because of course you are SUPPOSED to go out in service and have discussions with people, but doing that exposed me to all sorts of interesting ideas :).

So, I followed along with my parents, trying to be a good kid but always, always doubting. Eventually I hear indirectly that my cousin has slowed down going to meetings because, nope, it's not his job craziness like he excuses it to be, it's actually that he doesn't really BELIEVE IT. Whoa! Shocker! Someone in the family who doesn't really believe it!! I think this made it easier for myself to admit my own doubts. Still, when I researched a particular issue I was going through, I COVERED THE COMPUTER SCREEN with my hands, to try to filter out any apostate stuff I didn't need to see, and tried to keep my eyes on just my particular issue.

When there were signs outside the DC, I would say to myself 'just look down, don't read the signs, JUST LOOK DOWN!'

For me, it was doctrinal issues that made me take the big step. Otherwise, I was going to go along. Simply reading the New Testament instead of listening to the circuit assembly one day, I finally found Christ. I couldn't stay in any longer. Just in time too, before any of my kids were baptized. The first Ttatt fact I learned was about Beth Sarim. Sounded like Bethel, and I had never heard of it, there was an article in he 30's in LIFE magazine about it, and it WASNT IN THE PROCLAIMERS BOOK?? What???

30

Who would you like to hear of leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses ?

by wozza in

jw
friends

i'll start off with this one:.

some years ago when i was formulating my exit, i employed for some time an ms brother from another congregation.. i'd had a couple of young "worldly" lads work for me but they proved unreliable as they used drugs or alchohol and consequently would'nt arrive at work and such like.. so when i was was contacted by this brother and spoke to him and heard he'd worked at the australian bethel for some time on construction and wanted an opportunity to learn the trade of bricklaying ,i thought ,"great someone to finally trust and be reliable".

he was in his 40's at the time and he worked like a trojan ,was honest ,really likeable and interesting ,could play the classical guitar beautifully ,had a beautiful family.

FayeDunaway

My parents and my brother and my brother's kids. Close friends from old hall. Actually, everyone, except the paraplegic kids in wheelchairs thinking they were going to walk again, any day now.

20

How many of us are 'perfectionists'?

by FayeDunaway in

i made a medium level mistake at work today, and when i make mistakes it really shakes me up and takes me a long time to recover.

it completely rattles me, makes me feel awful about myself.

my mind keeps going back to the mistake reliving how i could have let it happen.

FayeDunaway

Thank you all for your thoughts!! I'm not the only one!!

I need to learn to brush off my mistakes, and say 'oh well. I'll do better next time' instead of let them eat at me. I'm not perfect, I will never be perfect in this life. I will do stupid stuff.

I feel better already, just saying that.

Ironically yes Xanthippe, when other people make mistakes or admit their lives aren't perfect I actually like them a whole lot better. This one lady I didn't like much, one day she told me her marriage needed a lot of work. Bam! I thought she was great. Yes, she became human. Why don't I have the same standards for myself?? I think being raised witness and trying to look perfect and be perfect all the time, and it's a works based 'faith.' There's a great shame in falling short of any of that. And yes im sure some of it might be genetic or neurological or just personality. But the judgmental culture was SO strong for us.

I think just being aware of this, and talking about it, will make our guilt and shame at our shortcomings, and failures at doing things perfectly, easier to deal with. John and mike im glad you're moving on from yours.

Thanks everyone!

7

Watchtowers Fruit Loops

by Watchtower-Free in

.

FayeDunaway

Both loopy AND fruity!

27

How to deal with anxiety?

by BlackWolf in

jw
friends

lately my mental health has been rapidly declining.

i have anorexia and deppression, and my anxiety has become overwhelming.

i have been to many doctors/therapists in the past, but because i have not been magically cured my parents dont want to get me any more help.

FayeDunaway

Your anxiety IS real. Mad Irishman doesn't realize, apparently, what being a homeschooled non believing witness 16 year old can feel like, how trapped and lonely you must feel!! (Tho I do like his advice to do physical activity, and pursuing hobbies and things you love are never a bad idea). You say you have tried therapy but it hasn't helped. Have you talked to a therapist about your feelings about your parents religion? It would be very good to be able to express to a real person how you feel about this. If that isn't enough to help you pass the time and feel healthier, maybe a big change of situation would help. How would you feel about going to public school? Would you know anyone at all, how long have you been homeschooled? You CAN talk to the councillor at school even if you are homeschooled. You are still a 16 year old living within their boundaries and they should help you. Have you looked into getting a part time job, learning to drive? You need to be an advocate for yourself to get out of this situation you are in. I know it's hard but you need to take action, it doesn't sound like your parents know what is best for you right now.

20

How many of us are 'perfectionists'?

by FayeDunaway in

i made a medium level mistake at work today, and when i make mistakes it really shakes me up and takes me a long time to recover.

it completely rattles me, makes me feel awful about myself.

my mind keeps going back to the mistake reliving how i could have let it happen.

FayeDunaway

I made a medium level mistake at work today, and when I make mistakes it REALLY shakes me up and takes me a long time to recover. It completely rattles me, makes me feel awful about myself. My mind keeps going back to the mistake reliving how I could have let it happen. I tend to remember my mistakes for many years down the line. I try to do anything to avoid confrontation, try to give great service and especially, make everyone happy. It occurred to me that maybe this is a shared feeling from growing up witness, where making an error brings you to judgment and condemnation. Do you try to be perfect all the time?? How do you react if you do make an error? If you were once like this but have gotten over it, how have you gotten over it? I appreciate any thoughts and advice!

101

My mom passed away yesterday....

by minimus in

jw
friends

thank you all for your sincere encouragement during these last few weeks.

finally, she is at peace.

i was with her , holding her hand when she died.

FayeDunaway

Remember the feel of her hand inside yours, and keep it with you as long as you live. Remember that you were there for her. You didn't leave her and she didn't leave you, despite religious differences. She was a good mother and you were a good son.

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