Posts by Cicatrix

71

My sad news

by Fe2O3Girl in

jw
friends

as some of you on the board knew i was expecting a baby, i feel i should let you know that things have not worked out for us.. when i went for the 20 week ultrasound scan last thursday, severe problems were found with our baby's internal development.

only one kidney was detected, and it was very enlarged and polycystic.

there was no long term hope for the baby at all; if it survived to full term it could only live for hours at most.

Cicatrix

{{{Fe203 and Husband}}}
I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss:( May you continue to find hope in your commitment to each other, and may the love you share help you to heal.

Regards,
Cicatrix

9

Your First Christmas Tree?

by BrendaCloutier in

jw
friends

the end of 1986 i moved from my hometown of portland oregon to the big city of seattle.. it was 1987 and some new friends from that summer (met sailboat racing on puget sound) called and said they had permits and were going christmas tree hunting, did i want to come along.

yeah, of course.

should be fun!.

Cicatrix

When I told my family we were going to celebrate Christmas, my grandma gave me almost all of her ornaments and decorations, and said "welcome back":)At age 95 and 89, Grandpa and she felt that putting up all the Christmas decorations expended too much of their energy, so they kept a few and passed the rest onto us.

My grandma is so organized, most of the decorations have a little note, stating who gave the item to them, and what year they got them. I've kept the notes right with the ornaments, and enjoy reading them every year. Other folks may have more beautifuly coordinated trees, but I wouldn't trade the chance to have a huge piece of my grandparent's history (and mine) that I can treasure every year:) And best of all, was the happiness I got to see on Grandma's face when she welcomed me back to Christmas, and celebrated with my children as they discovered Christmas for the first time:)

BTW Brenda, your tree sounded really lovely. Christmas and "cute" just go together somehow;)

25

Its a girl

by mouthy in

jw
friends

my 11th great grandchild was born at 9.13 pm tonight 8lbs 30z by natural childbirth her name will be tavia melanie legg.

mother & baby is doing well- great granma is totally exhausted.....

Cicatrix

Whoohooo!

Congratulations Grandma Mouthy, Baby Tavia, and to your Grandaughter! I hope you all get some well-deserved rest.

Love,
Cicatrix

90

Name Things That You Can Be Counseled For

by minimus in

jw
friends

i'll start.......a woman wearing a skirt higher than her knee and a child crying during a meeting

Cicatrix

You can be counseled when your husband hits you for not being a "submissive enough" wife:(

Commenting too much or too "authoritatively" at meetings (usually women)

Refusing to wear nylons under your ankle length skirt on a ninety degree day.

Owning a two door five speed sports car which you regularly drive to the service meeting, even though you own a van;)

changing your hair color too many times

wearing black clothing

disciplining a pioneer's grandaughters while chaperoning during a school function

admitting that you like unicorns and dragons

carrying out your physical therapist's orders to practice yoga to help you deal with chronic pain after everything else you've tried has failed, including drugs

reading the Bible and coming up with your own understanding of what you have read

arranging to help a sister who is having a hard time after giving birth, after the elders have ignored her husband's request for help and he comes to you in frustrated tears

not being able to go out in field service for four months because you are so sick with morning sickness that you can't leave your bed, let alone your house

accidentally getting pregnant, even though you are married

41

Teenagers

by Purza in

jw
friends

i am the mother of one teenage daughter.

i don't really know where i am going with this post -- i just know that i feel like i am going crazy.

my daughter is 14 and is a very smart kid.

Cicatrix

Well, she sounds like a normally developing teen to me:)

I have two teens, and a twenty-something year-old. I'm still muddling through and learning myself, but some things I've found to be good advice are:

1.Pick your battles. It gets tiresome making lists of rules and negotiating every darn little issue. In our household, tobacco, alcohol and drug use is non negotiable. My kids do what they like with their rooms-I only ask them to clean it if we have to offer it to company, and they have no problem with this. They choose their clothes, also, but I set the budget. If they want to go above the budget, they have to cover the extra cost. They may not buy any clothing that promotes illegal behavior until they are eighteen. After that, I don't offer clothing advice unless asked.

2. When you say no, mean it. Teens will try everything in their arsenal to wear you down. Sometimes, the more you try to explain your reasonable position, the more they will try to prove how unreasonable it is by their standards, or the family down the streets standards, or their teacher's standards, or...anyway, my usual response if my attempts at reasoning fail is "Other people are welcome to do things the way they choose. This is the way we do things in this family. When you are legally responsible for your own behavior, you may choose to handle this in any way you wish."If that fails, I simply apply the "broken record technique"-I repeat my request over and over in a calm voice until the child runs out of reasons.Or I remove myself from the teen's access, but not before I tell them that I expect whatever I requested to be done.

3. That being said, make sure when you say no, you have a pretty good reason for doing so first. And if you realize that you really didn't, don't be afraid to say "I'm sorry, I was wrong."

4. The more insistent and argumentative your teen gets, the more you should try to speak in a calm, lower tone. Don't know why this works for me, but it does;)

5. Motorcycles are great tools for teaching responsibility. Grounding a teen boy off his motorcycle is viewed by him as a fate worse than death:)(find your child's bargaining chip and use it sparingly but effectively).

6. Try to commend your teen as much as you "discipline" them. Believe me, even on a really rotten day, you can find something to commend them for (have had alot of those, especially with one certain, very intelligent and stubborn son, lol).

7. Be an active listener. This sounds easy, but it is really alot harder to do than you think when you come home from work dead tired and want nothing more than to flop down in front of the tv. Really listening to your kids encourages them to really listen to you, plus you find out what interesting and complex beings they truly are:)

8. Participate in your teen's school functions. They may act like they don't want you to attend their events, but you may be pleasantly surprised how happy they are when you do. Just don't expect them to walk down the hall with you before or after the event, lol.

9. Don't be afraid to step outside of the box sometimes. Try something new your child has shown you. I've learned about soccer while playing it with my sons, I'm slowly learning about motocross racing, and I may someday learn to appreciate movies that feature lots of bathroom type humor (hey, I didn't say this was always easy).More importantly, I'm teaching them to try new experiences that I introduce them to by respecting them enough to try some things I would normally not be interested in aka-bathroom humor, heehee).

10. Read to or with your teens. For some reason, we tend to slack off on encouraging reading when our kids are teens. Aliteracy is a growing problem, and many folks never learn to read fluently or learn to enjoy reading for reading's sake, because they don't do it outside of the school setting. It's simply seen as something that "must" be done, instead of something that brings great enjoyment and enrichment to life. I still read aloud to my sons, and they occasionally share with me something they've read that they really like.I buy them magazines geared toward their interests, too. They can't resist motorcycle magazines, lol.

11. Traveling in cars is a great opportunity for "life talks"-all those serious issues that we have to talk with our teens about. It's intimate because your interacting one on one with your child, yet somehow some of the tough issues seem easier to cover while one is looking down the road, especially in the dark. I've had some of my most profound conversations with my children in the car.

12. I know it's hard putting up with the "daily grind," but try to appreciate the fact that your teen is having these battles with you because they are growing up. When they feel secure enough to show you their worst side, you're actually doing a great job. Some kids are just more secure than others, lol. It's a parent's job to give your kids wings.And with some kids you just have to grit your teeth and hope they don't fly too close to the sun:)

13. Don't be overly concerned with mistakes you make in childrearing. You're human too. Sometimes we and our children learn more from a mistake than from doing things "the right way."

Oh, and I can't forget to say "Good Luck." That comes in handy sometimes, too;)

43

We're having a baby .......

by Perry in

jw
friends

boy!

(passes out fine cigars to all that want one).

we are 5 months along and due may 8th.

Cicatrix

Beautiful Boy

Close your eyes
Have no fear
The monster?s gone
He?s on the run and your daddy?s here

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy

Before you go to sleep
Say a little prayer
Every day in every way
It?s getting better and better

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy

Out on the ocean sailing away
I can hardly wait
To see you come of age
But I guess we?ll both just have to be patient
?cause it?s a long way to go
A hard row to hoe
Yes it?s a long way to go
But in the meantime

Before you cross the street
Take my hand
Life is what happens to you
While you?re busy making other plans

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy

Before you go to sleep
Say a little prayer
Every day in every way
It?s getting better and better

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
Beautiful boy
Darling, darling, darling
Darling sean [and Lucas Dominick Little:)]

~ John Lennon (with a lil editing-I'm sure he wouldn't mind;)

Congratulations to all three of you! Boys are great fun. I have four, and one grandson, too.The years go by much quicker than you think. Enjoy him at every stage.

Cicatrix

30

Do you believe Mary was a virgin?

by JustTickledPink in

jw
friends

my catholic friend and i were talking the other night about the virgin mary.

she doesn't even believe that she was a virgin and she doesn't believe in the immaculate conception.

if you think about it logically today, if you had a fiance that went to visit relatives for a few months and then came back pregnant and told you it was god's child, would you believe it?

Cicatrix

"Mulan, then of course the other option is to believe they were all virgin births! Seems logic would dictate that the more often it occurred the more likely it is to re-occurr. More unbelieveable if it only happened once in all of history. Generally mammals do not successfully reproduce by hermophroditic events. Many lower animals do. I once had a goat when I was young that gave birth without ever being bred. The kid was malformed and died within a couple days but it was a successful birth.

There are many stories of virgin births outside of the mythical mirical men of non-Christian origin. They almost always result in still births. Who knows! Still don't think it means squat!"

Carmel,

I think along these same lines. I actually just got into the was Mary a virgin discussion with someone the other day, and mentioned parthenogenises. A successful "virgin birth"/parthenogensises would certainly classify as a miracle, wouldn't it?;)

22

Your favorite holiday movie(s)?

by gaiagirl in

television listings and movie theatres are filled with lots of seasonal films now, and many dvds are also available for films from earlier years.

i confess to having a difficult time selecting just one.

among my favorites would have to be christmas vacation, with chevy chase.

Cicatrix

"The Grinch (the real one, not the new one)"

I own that one, too. I forgot to put in on my fave tv list, oh my! I have the teddy Grinch, the ornaments, and I plan to buy the book.

The book is much better than the tv show:)

22

Your favorite holiday movie(s)?

by gaiagirl in

television listings and movie theatres are filled with lots of seasonal films now, and many dvds are also available for films from earlier years.

i confess to having a difficult time selecting just one.

among my favorites would have to be christmas vacation, with chevy chase.

Cicatrix

"Hey, has anyone seen Elf with Will Ferrel? I love him and want to see the movie, but I heard from some people that it's stupid."

I've seen it. I liked it, but I kinda like simplistic humor, so I'm probably not the one to ask. Bob Newhart was Will Ferrel's adopted elf father. I enjoyed seeing him again. I miss the Newhart show. "This is my brother Larry, this is my other brother, Larry."

Will Ferrel played the role of the "innocent" very well.For me, it was refreshing to see something not so jaded for once.

My teen boys liked it, too, though.

42

Another Question to ask everyone!

by whyamihere in

ok, i have a question that popped in my head!.

what is one song you listen to and you love but are to embarrassed to admit it!.

mine is by abba ....fernando!.

Cicatrix

"Mine is by ABBA ....Fernando!"

I used to adore ABBA. I wore my cassette tape out:) That song reminds me of a book I read about a Spanish bull who refused to fight whose name was Fernando. There's absolutely no connection, but everytime I hear that song, I think of Fernando sitting in his field smelling his flower, lol.

I also LOVE Raffi songs.I used to listen to them constantly when my kids were little, and I never tired of them. I'm in my late thirties, and I love "Baby Beluga." I went to a church retreat last summer, and we go together one afternoon to sing. There was an old hippy (not an insult-that's what he refers to himself as;) ) accompanying us on the guitar. We were taking turns picking songs out of the songbook, and I requested Baby Beluga, lol. He looked at me kinda puzzled for a moment, and everyone else in the group chuckled, but had a great time belting it out-even old hippy.