The "Devil" has captured you indeed!!! Specially when you are ready to celebrate all this "pagan" holidays...
I left 10 years ago and haven't regret it for a single minute. I lost my family, friends relatives(remember that in our parts we have strong family bond) but I wouldn't go back there for a all the money on this earth. I'm free and I love it..
I spend time for my self now. I like riding my big motorbike and travel around at weekends. I found old lost friends, I do enjoy Christmas, New Years Day, even I get post cards for my birthday. After leaving WT I have learned to love my self, but most of all I have learned to accept people the way they are. I don't afraid from the big A, I live each day like it is my last, that's why I enjoy life.
No I'm on my way to start a new life, I'm relocating my self either to Holland or UK and I'm ready to face new challenges. I feel self confidence and I know who I'm, since I don't need any one to tell me who I'm.