LusciousJ-- Sorry you're going through that. I do have one word of advice: Recognize that every new occurrence of rejection will be experienced as a re-wounding [which it is]. As horrible as it sounds, set hope aside--realize that you are doing this for you, and they may NEVER accept your position. They MAY eventually soften attitude toward you, but if you allow yourself to entertain hopes of them getting out--especially anytime soon--you will only set yourself up for a perpetual roller coaster ride.
Accept that, for now, this is where she/ they are at...and that this is where you are at...and that, for now, there can only be tension and/ or fireworks, hurt and resentment between you. These things only heal with time in a situation such as this, if they ever do heal. Give her time to heal, from the hole she feels you have ripped through her belly in rejecting everything she holds dear.
Facts have been presented; that only needs to be done once. Let time and her good thinking skills do the rest. If she is not capable of reaching the conclusions on her own, then nothing you do will influence her positively in that direction. Accept that TIME is the only potential convincer. And realize that even if she does die still angry at you, ask yourself: What is the alternative? Going back into the Borg, pretending, and feeling like you are dying inside? Could you ever forgive yourself for putting yourself through that? Remember, stubborn, angry people have a habit of living for a looooooong time. Does your life deserved to be bottled up and put on hold, to appease her?
The situation hurts like hell. And, yes, the longer it--the separation from people who matter most to you--goes on, the more it DOES hurt!! In this respect, what I do to handle my own situation is to call every once in a while and leave a short message, saying I love you, and that's pretty much it. It helps keep the loneliness and pain on my end down to a manageable level and the anger/ resentment/ lashing back on their end to a minimum. No convincing, no pleading my case, no giving them details of a life they don't want to hear about...just, "I love you. Bye."
Hope this helps in some way.