hi guys,.
some of you may remember me, i've been on here before in the past and been about on the exjws forums on and off for about 7 years now.
you've probably also seen me advertising the xjw meet ups in london as well..... :-).
Thank you so much to everyone who's done it so far, I really appreciate it! I'll probably close the survey in the next few days to start analysing the data. And thank you very much to Phizzy for all the bumps! :-)
And yes to Haulin' oats, you do get an extra lion and possibly even a polar bear!
hi guys,.
some of you may remember me, i've been on here before in the past and been about on the exjws forums on and off for about 7 years now.
you've probably also seen me advertising the xjw meet ups in london as well..... :-).
LOL @ Phizzy, I totally did only just get up at midday as well! Sorry guys! Ok, Chariklo, you are completely right, it says information sheet, when it should say refer to the information written above. This is because I just copied and pasted it from paper surveys/experiments that we normally do. Thanks for pointing it out, I've edited it now! xx
And thank you so much to everyone who has done it so far, it really really helps! I realise that it can take about 25 minutes to do, this is because for the study to be taken seriously in academia, I need to ask lots of different questions to make sure I am looking at what I say I am looking at. I can't really use the data unless you complete it to the end, so if you can do it, it would be really great if you could stick it out till the end.
I've had a few emails now from the leading psychologists in this area, and have been speaking with a sociologist who specialises in new religious movements/cults/sects etc. And an MP in Belgium. Plenty of people are interested in this study, so it is likely that it will get published, but that is only if I get enough people to do it. So if you do want to pass the link on to other exJWs or other former members of other religious groups then please do pass it on, but don't make them feel pressured as it must be completely voluntary.
Thank you so much for the support so far guys, I of course will let you know the results when I have them sometime later in the year....
(Why can't I paste anything in this box??)
hi guys,.
some of you may remember me, i've been on here before in the past and been about on the exjws forums on and off for about 7 years now.
you've probably also seen me advertising the xjw meet ups in london as well..... :-).
Thanks 00Dad!!! :-)
hi guys,.
some of you may remember me, i've been on here before in the past and been about on the exjws forums on and off for about 7 years now.
you've probably also seen me advertising the xjw meet ups in london as well..... :-).
Hi guys,
Some of you may remember me, I've been on here before in the past and been about on the exJWs forums on and off for about 7 years now. You've probably also seen me advertising the xJW meet ups in London as well..... :-)
Well I am a psychology student at The University of Kent, UK. And am currently conducting a study on the long-term effects of leaving a high control religious group. So far about 60 exJWs have done the online survey and a couple of exScientologists..... people that have got back to me about it have told me that they found it interesting and that they believe it to have asked some important questions.
Currently there is no academic research in the field of psychology looking at what I am looking at. And now I have a few of the leading psychology (and some sociology) researchers saying they are interested in the study and look forward to hearing the results.
I need as many exJWs to do the survey as possible (at least 200 eventually would be good), so if you would like to do it, I would be extremely grateful! It is completely confidential and no identifiable information will be asked of you like your name etc. It will only ask your age, gender and nationality. You can also have your data removed at a later time if you wanted to for whatever reason. It is obviously completely voluntary, so if you do forward it on to friends (for which I would be really grateful) please do not pressure anyone to do it. :-) People have told me it has taken on average about 20-25 minutes to do, this is because for the information to be valid and to test the current theories there are a lot of questions we need to ask.
If you have any questions/comments/thoughts/feelings about the study, feel free to ask me either here, or at: to62 @ kent.ac.uk
Here is the link to the survey: https://kentpsych.eu.qualtrics.com/SE?SID=SV_37Row0YtLkAwNWA
:-)
i rented a house in the late !970's and the contents in the home were given to me.. it happened to be books: ( making my life happy, revelation, children bible stories, listening to the great teacher ) i was enjoying the reading.. -----------------------------------.
a few years later began to notice awake magazines in doctor offices, and other public places and read them and enjoyed them.. ------------------------------------.
late 1980's my 7th son was 2 yrs.
If it were a spirit of some kind coming into your sons beroom, why would it open a door? If I were you I'd question your son more on this. What did the man look like? What else did he say? Did the man touch you? This story to me sounds very worrying indeed. Someone earlier said what if someone else still had a key, I think a good idea would be to change your locks, and improve your houses security. Unless all this was a long time ago?
Like others have said, I urge you to keep an open mind and question everything. There are good things about the religion, but as you will find out, the majority of people on this website have been hurt by the organisation and the way it controls its people, by forcing them to shun all who are not Jehovah's witnesses, even if that includes their own families.
If you feel praying helps you, then I suggest keep praying, and look into other faiths. Also consider that maybe you don't need a religion to set you laws and restrictions, maybe you could have a healthy relationship with God and your family without anyone else telling you how to do it.
I wish you all the best in your searches, and just remember there is nothing more important than your own family, not even a God or a religion.
i came out of the closet when i was 18 yrs to my parents & the elders expelled me out ever since that my life has changed completely!!!
i was born under a jw household and i finally celebrated my first birthday when i was 21 yrs and it felt weird.
i was just wondering how to cope w/ this feelings, sometimes i want to go back but i can't ignore my feelings.
I suppose you could call me bi. But i live with my boyf now. One of the first things that made me question the religion was when I was sitting in the park with other young JW's on a sunny day. There were 2 guys sunbathing near us and they were holding hands. The other witnesses were disgusted and voiced as such. When I said to the them to stop it, they thought I'd said something demonic even!! Me and my boyf go to a lot of gay clubs etc, just cos we always have a better time there, free to be yourself and dance!!
I've seen there is a website especially for gay/lesbian ex-jw's. www.gayxjw.org and www.gaywitness.force9.co.uk. Don't know what they are like really. They may help you if you wanna meet other ex jw's that are gay?
I'm really proud of you for coming out in such a difficult situation. I went to college to study fashion, so I made a lot of gay friends, and my aunt is gay. It's amazing to hear the stories of things that gay people go through just to be themselves. I think they must be one of the strongest, brave groups of people there are!
my name is terri, and i live in the south of england.
i used to be a regular pioneer in the jw's, i stopped going to the meetings about 5 years ago.
and my life has just got better and better.
Thanks everybody for your really positive messages!
In answer to some of your questions. Someone asked how I came out of the witnesses by myself. I never got disfellowshipped, in fact I was still a reg pioneer when I stopped. I'd missed quite a few meetings due to illness, but would always get the tapes of the meetings. A few people's attitudes caused me to question it all. And that while I was ill, not one witness came to visit me, yet all my work friends were concerned, and I'd never even been out with any of them before, due to 'bad assoc' and all that.
One day while on ministry on my own, I was walking down this really long road, where I always saw at least one witness, cos a lot of JW's lived in that area. I was feeling really shitty, and I was praying like I always did. I said, look Jehovah, I've never asked you for anything, and I've always done what was right, I've dedicated my whole life to you, yet I'm always alone, no-one ever supports me. I visit, and encourage other 'low' witnesses, and help the younger ones, and spend up to 12 hours in a day on the ministry by foot. I asked that at least maybe one witness would drive past and wave and that would show me that he cared and I was doing the right thing. Well it didn't happen, and I started to feel guilty for 'testing' God. So I asked that a witness drove past, and they didn't need to wave, no-one did. So I changed it to a green car driving past, bearing in mind this is the busiest road in town, and I'd never walked down it before without seeing a witness. No green car passed me either, I started to think this was weird. So I asked for a red car, and I gave it 3 minutes!! How common a colour is Red, normally every other car you see is red. Not one red car passed. This really freaked me out. Amongst other things happening, I just stopped going. I went for a night out with friends from work, and had the most amazing time ever, I went to a nightclub for the 1st time, and didn't get back till 5am. I didn't get drunk, or do anything else a witness shouldn't do. The next day my mum told me I had untill the next day to move out. She knew I'd been made redundant from work, and I had no savings. So with no money, no home, and no friends, cos I'd never made any proper friends yet from work, I was out. I went to work the next day crying, and this guy who'd fancied me for ages, said I could stay in his spare room, till I sorted myself out. I ended up making some brilliant friends, eventually got another job and everything started getting better and better!
A few years later, I was feeling a bit low again, and for the first time since leaving the religion I prayed to God or whoever was out there. I was walking to work and I said if there is anyone there that cared, please answer me. I said if you care and I'm on the right path in life then please make a red car drive out from that small road. I could see between 2 houses a very narrow road, which had no traffic coming from it. I stood still and watched the road, of which I could only see the exit as it lead into the main road. What happened next will stay with me for the rest of my life. I thought I'd wait for ages for a red car to drive out. But straight away a red car drove out, then another one right after it, then another one, eventually I realised 7 red cars drove out of that narrow road!!! This made me cry and feel very happy and loved! I later found out, that this road was in fact a drive through to a very small car park that was just for the people who lived in flats there. How weird that they should all have red cars, and they all drove out at the same time!!
I don't follow any religion anymore, I'm not even interested in the bible, but I do know that somebody cares and they don't have lots of rules about things!!
Love Terri,
x
i am looking for my grandfather that i have never met before.
his name is robert funk.
my dad learned his fathers name when he applied for his social security.
I don't know anyone with that name, I hope you find him though!
But that by far, is the coolest name I have ever heard!! I'm going to change my name to Ms Funk, and when I have a child, I'll call him 'WatThe'!!
my name is terri, and i live in the south of england.
i used to be a regular pioneer in the jw's, i stopped going to the meetings about 5 years ago.
and my life has just got better and better.
Hi,
My name is Terri, and I live in the South of England. I used to be a regular pioneer in the JW's, I stopped going to the meetings about 5 years ago. And my life has just got better and better. I like a lot of you on this site went through some tough times, not as tough as some of you. I still have issues that I'm constantly trying to reprogramme my brain about, left over from my JW days!! I've just recently got over the idea of looking into the truth behind the JW's. I'd never looked at sites on the web, probably still left with the indoctrination of fear of 'apostates'!! I'm not looking to get back at any of the witnesses, I still have a sister who is one, and I would hate to upset her. I just remind myself of how lost into it all I was. How naive I was, and how much I strongly believed it all, and sacrificed my freedom willingly for it.
I've been working in Sales recently, but I've decided it's not for me. I'm looking to study to become either a life coach or a hypnotherapist. Since looking on the net, I've discovered there are a lot of angry ex-witnesses out there (and rightly so) but there doesn't seem to be a lot of help or advice on how to get on with their lives passed the witnesses.
I've ordered the book crisis of conscience, so am looking forward to reading that. Does anyone know of any groups, therapists, books etc that specialise in helping ex-witnesses "de-programme" themselves, and get on with their lives in a positive way???
I remember one year, I think there was a scripture as the annual scripture they put up on the back of the kingdom hall on the platform. And it said "Do not lean upon your own understanding". And I followed that scripture all through my teen years. Each time, I heard someone say something negative about the "truth", or if I had any doubts of my own, I would quote that scripture to myself. Stopping my own thoughts. When I reached 21, I started to allow myself to think for myself. This has been the most difficult, yet most rewarding thing I have ever done! Very scary at times, but now I can be proud that I got myself out, and I realised for myself that I could live without that religion and live a happy life.
Is anyone else out there proud of themselves for the same thing??
I say I'm not angry anymore, but sometimes I feel bitter, of my lost years in it, but I learnt a lot about life and how not to live it!!
I hope I've not gone on too much, and I'd love to talk to others, and hear your stories about how you got yourself free!!
Love
Terri,
xxx
_________________
Always lean upon your own understanding. You have the power inside you to be great! Love yourself! x
