Posts by jambon1

95

I think my faith might be returning. Feeling very confused.

by jambon1 in

jw
friends

i've been out the organisation for around 8 years.

when i first left, im positive that i suffered from some sort of post traumatic stress.

i was very angry at myself for accepting the really bad parts of the religion that i strongly disagreed with.

jambon1

Morning

Well, don't I feel spiritually bipolar. :D

Today I don't feel the same as yesterday. This has been the story of the last year or so, to be fair.

Yesterday I opened the KJV and came across the account of King Davids baby. It's mind bending and took me right back to the feelings I had as an awkward, faithless JW. The reality being that despite getting this strong urge from time to time (which I never had for years after leaving the org) I just find the bible accounts to difficult to grasp. It's one thing reading the NT and enjoying it, appreciating some of its moral direction. But it's quite the other to love and worship the god it claims to represent.

Some of the comments on this thread are interesting. I don't see the need, however, for people to be so dismissive & semi abusive about those with faith. We're all at different stages of our journey. I've had feelings in the last while that I never thought I'd have just a few years ago. Such is life. Some people are in danger of adopting attitudes which are alarmingly similar to those in the JW religion from which we've all escaped.

In spite of believing in a creator or certainly a god of some kind, I don't think I can wholeheartedly pursue faith at the moment. It really does open you up to a lot of mental gymnastics that I can't really be bothered working out.

Thanks for for all your input.

Peace.

J.

95

I think my faith might be returning. Feeling very confused.

by jambon1 in

jw
friends

i've been out the organisation for around 8 years.

when i first left, im positive that i suffered from some sort of post traumatic stress.

i was very angry at myself for accepting the really bad parts of the religion that i strongly disagreed with.

jambon1

Hi

I've been out the organisation for around 8 years. When I first left, Im positive that I suffered from some sort of post traumatic stress. I was very angry at myself for accepting the really bad parts of the religion that I strongly disagreed with. In the process I kind of looked at myself as an atheist and was happy with that. I'd had my fill of religion.

However, in the last year or so, I've found it hard to separate myself from my belief that there is a creator. This was one of the main things that made me grasp life as a JW. That part really made sense to me. I've tried to dismiss it due to my complete mistrust of religion but I can't do it. Last year I even went to one meeting at the KH. However, my disdain for the witnesses manner of worship and their made up rules really does mean that I could never return there. I can't really express strongly enough in this post that I'm not entertaining in any way returning to meetings.

But where does that leave me? I've got a burning desire to read the bible again and when I do it sort of makes sense to me. But I could never be partof a religion again. Is there anyone else like this?

I'll be clear also when I say they none of this comes from a lack of happiness. I have a happy family. I enjoy my work. Have a good balance with that. I also have tons of friends and a very active social life. The only thing I'd say is that I've never been all that happy with my kind of lapse from being a more moral thinking person. Since leaving the witnesses I've kind of let all that go to some extent (not done bad things though).

It just feels like I'm being drawn to a spiritual outlook. But how? And what can I do? Start praying again? When I read the bible a lot of it makes sense and yet a lot of it just confuses me.

Thoughts?

2

'Deserving' to die

by jambon1 in

personally, i never got this.. a person is born a sinner & thus deserves to die.

this is at the forefront of religion.

it is the axis that it spins on, making people dependant on their religion/god for freedom from their cursed condition.

jambon1

Personally, I never got this.

A person is born a sinner & thus deserves to die. This is at the forefront of religion. It is the axis that it spins on, making people dependant on their religion/god for freedom from their cursed condition. Romans 5:12.

But, if you actually think about it - how can a person deserve to die?

We don't individually choose life. It is all down to a serious of chances.

It's like inflicting a punishment on someone for something they never did.

How can grown adults, with the ability to reason & follow logic believe that a person somehow deserves to die an agonising death from cancer at the age of 40? Watch this link & tell me that these children deserved this horriffic illnes because of the sin of a man thousadns of years ago.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-dorset-21828145

Think about it.

21

Interview with an Apostate: Cofty

by cofty in

tell us a little about yourself and your family.. my wife and i are fortunate to live in a lovely little country cottage northumberland in northern england.

we have two children who have both grown up and left home.

our son is a physical training instructor in the royal air force and our daughter works in the historic city of york.. were you a born in or a convert?.

jambon1

Brilliant interview mate.

I too had a crisis of faith during the tusnami disaster. I can remember feeling utterly dejected as it finally hit home that I had very little/no faith left.

It was also difficult to make the decision to leave. A horrible time in my life.

Being able to think things through freely & come to my own conclusions was/is so lioberating.

443

The 1914 generation is still going strong 100 years later - 2014 study article.

by THE GLADIATOR in

january 2014 watchtower study article.

let your kingdom comebut when?.

this generation will not pass away.

jambon1

Never, ever will you hear the word 'generation' referred to like this. It's utterly hilarious.

Go out and ask ten people in the street what a 'generation' is. They'll tell you what the rest of humanity thinks a generation is.

Its incredible that people swallow this. Mind you, the definition & the teaching over the generation has been played about with more times than Bubbles the monkey so understandable that the rank & file JW just sits and takes it.

Fools.

20

How I miss the 'Truth' of my youth....

by gingerbread in

jw
friends

my family moved from the city to the country.. part of the reason for the relocation was to move 'to where the need was greater'.

i loved our new home - i was free to roam the woods and fields, enjoy the wildlife, work in our garden and feed the chickens.

i had new friends in our new congregation.

jambon1

I've went through a strange time in the last year, sort of looking back all glassy eyed at my JW past.

I recall the feeling of being in a unique group of people seperate from other religions. Doing ministry for the love of it, really believing I had something special.

No, I wasn't brought up in 1950's WT. This was the 90's/00's.

Those emotions were a result of a late teen coming to accurate knowledge.

But the truth is, as the years past, I saw so much that was wrong & so much hypocrisy. I saw corrupt elders, bitchy old cows that were elders wives & a political system that people 'played'. This wasn't the accurate knowledge that I learned.

The halcion days of loving the ministry turned around full circle & the day I opted to 'work on my own' so that I could pretend to knock people's doors was the tipping point. I had to leave. I despised my life.

The organisation is just like any other religion & then some. Nice people & bad people all mixed together. And a very, very untrustworthy & checkered leadership.

406

Goodbye JWD/JWN (my last post)

by slimboyfat in

jw
friends

after some considerable thought i have decided that i will no longer post on this forum because i want to return to jehovah.

thank you for all the kindness and many interesting discussions over the years.

i wish you all well in the future and the decisions you make.

jambon1

The feeling of nagging doubts that occur when you're sitting through the meetings was utterly soul destroying to me.

As much as I believed some of the teachings, the ideas about the way to treat disfellowshipped people, god destroying human beings & the blood issue just ate away at me.

Don't know how anyone could return.

293

AGM 5 OCTOBER 2013 (UNOFFICIAL RUMORS)

by WatchTower87 in

- 23 day to go .. annual meeting unofficial rumors.

- new bible.

- new nwt (revision).

jambon1

Can I ask what on earth they can change about their bible? Is this a piss take or for real?

62

What kind of scandal would cause most JW to leave the "truth"?

by Iamallcool in

jw
friends

jambon1

I was once told by an up and coming JW (previous waster) that if the entire GB was found to be paedophiles it still wouldn't stumble him against the truth.

Not that they're brain washed or that.

74

Are JWs more negative than normal people?

by Julia Orwell in

jw
friends

compare a typical conversation with a jw to one with a random non-jw:.

run into jw in the shops.. .

jw:[surprised] julia!

jambon1

One of the things that finally got me leaving the religion was that it dawned on me that I couldn't conscientiously offer people a 'better way of life' by becoming a Jehovah's Witness.

The utter misery of life at the hall/field service/gatherings. The gossiping & suspicion & paranoia.

All I could see was that my worldly friends (despite having their own private struggles) were ultimately happier people.

Why would anyone want to become a JW and expose themselves to the utter arseholes that were running/running our congregation?

I realised that my own thinking had become so negative and paranoid that it was actually unnatural for a healthy 20odd year old to be feeling do dissatisfied with what was essentially a very nice life that I'd built for myself (outside jw stuff).