with all the hurt and pain from so many witness's being insulted by the socitys strange veiws on so many issues that it claims is from gods own heart, it leads me at times to ask: "jehovah just where are you and do you really see anything at all going on with in an oranization that claims to be your own".
waiting for an ansure.. pepper
Seeker 4 and Mackin,
I love how your minds are thinking! I totally agree with you. Isn't it great to think much more positively because we give ourselves the credit for being able to make needed changes--not some mythological religion? I'll be looking forward to reading more of your posts.
Becky
with all the hurt and pain from so many witness's being insulted by the socitys strange veiws on so many issues that it claims is from gods own heart, it leads me at times to ask: "jehovah just where are you and do you really see anything at all going on with in an oranization that claims to be your own".
waiting for an ansure.. pepper
Joseph,
If your God has hidden the "truth in plain sight", with the result of millions dying from all religious backgrounds over the years due to their lack of knowledge, no thanks. I too do not believe there is a God sitting idly by while waiting for HIS time to arrive. How selfish--would you as a father give your children a book that he couldn't understand, then kill them because they couldn't understand it correctly because it wasn't YOUR time yet? How sick is that?
We are perfectly capable of choosing to live our lives in harmony with others, without the dictates of religious leaders and their minions. We are also capable on our own of treating the earth with the respect it deserves as our provider of life. We do not need a faceless, mythological being to tell us how to live, and then change their mind whenever they want, because it isn't in THEIR plan, and then to kill us off because we weren't paying attention to the "hidden truth"!?!
And as for the supposed "facts" that have been revealed about the life and death of Jesus compared to other mythological people, where's your proof? I prefer to live by the standards he outlined to treat others, not use his supposed life, death, and resurrection to exclude and condemn others for not believing.
Becky
please can everyone think twice before they make posts containing bad language (even if not directed at individuals), graphic sex talk and nude or semi-nude pictures (especially if explicit).
this is not what the forum is here for.
if you want to post stuff like that then there are lots of places on the internet for it and, more importantly, if people want to see and read stuff like that then they are quite capable of going to these places themselves.. i know everyone likes to 'let their hair down' now and again, me included, and i like pictures of sexy women as much as anyone .
Simon,
I'm going to have to speak up again. I totally agree with Mackin. If we can't come here and be honest with who we are right now in life, then what exactly is this forum for? If it's for having a white-washed appearance for the dubs, then why have specific sections for Adult, Sex, Disagreements etc.? You yourself said that "it isn't wanted even in the adult section". Then what exactly are they for? Biblical approved discussions of sex?
And what exactly qualifies as smut? Why would it be ok for you to start a thread like the 9" one (knowing how people would think), but it not be ok for someone else to post a nasty post regarding something THEY may need to talk about? I'm sure that your post, as well as other not as explicit posts, was just as offensive to some. There are many here who have expressed that they don't want to talk or read about sexual subjects, and who don't like cussing. That is their choice, and they can choose not to read it. There are many though who need this place to be an outlet for all the emotional trauma you go thru when you leave. And for many of us, that includes the colorful words from time to time as well.
Why is it so bad to want to talk about things that we never could before, but we need to "be careful" just because there may be dubs lurking? Isn't the whole point of a forum to be able to discuss, talk it out, think, read, disagree etc.? Am I wrong in thinking that's what it's for?
I don't mean to be disrespectful of all the hard work you do to keep a wonderful and informative board open for us. But, why is it so easy to fall back on "for the dubs"? I do not think that some of the shock posts are "beneficial", so to speak, but the people who post some of those obviously need a place to let it out.
IMHO, if any dubs come here and are offended, that's because they are jw's--not because we are "apostates"--and because they may not be ready anyway. And they still have the option to CHOOSE to read what they want, just like a tv show, a movie, a book, music, just like they chose to come to this board. One of the biggest lessons we all learned from quitting the borg was that our life is OUR CHOICE. And that same lesson will be for any and all other dubs who CHOOSE to come here.
That said, I think that everyone here would disagree on exactly what should be allowed and what shouldn't. I wasn't even offended by KJV's post--it was pretty graphic and disgusting, but I CHOSE to read it. I think we should be able to choose what we want to read, even here. And to the fluff posters who try to interupt good subject lines, guess what--we can ignore them. I just sincerely hope this place doesn't turn out to be something that's a "front" for the jw's--I thought it was for us. I DO NOT want to offend anyone; however, jw's will always be offended, because we are "apostates", and because they are told to think that way.
Becky
we are a non-jw family with 2 kids under 5 thinking about hiring a jw live in nanny.
she is in her 30's, active jw.
we all have talked about mutual respect for each others religions, and all agreed to a hands off policy.
Hello all,
I was a nanny for 5 years to 2 families, both non-jw. The first family I was with I was still very much "in", but very close to leaving time-wise. The 2d family was during the aftermath. Since I was a nanny, I thought I'd speak up.
I think you should think it thru very carefully before deciding anything. It's not necessarily a bad thing, because you set the rules. You can maintain a close watch, and be diligent about asking your children what was said/done during the day. That way you can counteract anything that may cause your children to think of her as "better" because of her religion--which is their goal.
That said, I still would be careful. For the most part, she would probably make a very trustworthy nanny. Make sure she is very qualified like you would for anyone. But, and this is a big but, I did try to influence the children I cared for from time to time. I have been sitting here trying to remember, and I most definitely did. Especially when it came to holidays and birthdays. Of course, in my case, that changed with the 2d family because I left. However, if your children are well balanced and can accept that not everyone is like them, then you may be able to have a great nanny. Who knows, since you come on this forum, you may be able to help her in the future.
I hope that I've helped at least a little--just trust in your ability to make a good decision for you and for your family. I would never want to discriminate against anyone, but be prepared if you decide to do it. We are always here to help you whatever you decide.
Becky
please can everyone think twice before they make posts containing bad language (even if not directed at individuals), graphic sex talk and nude or semi-nude pictures (especially if explicit).
this is not what the forum is here for.
if you want to post stuff like that then there are lots of places on the internet for it and, more importantly, if people want to see and read stuff like that then they are quite capable of going to these places themselves.. i know everyone likes to 'let their hair down' now and again, me included, and i like pictures of sexy women as much as anyone .
Hello Simon and all,
I've really enjoyed reading what you all have written so far, because you seem to have very good intentions as to the purpose of this board. It is a wonderful place for us to vent, to heal, to grow, and the most importantly, to be able to think for ourselves.
However, here is my problem: this board is for self-expression, and unfortunately for any jw's who may visit, that is going to seem negative to them. Too bad, I say, for we've been lied to all our life, and for some of us, that may come out in very negative ways (KJV comes to mind, no offence), until we make the steps forward to get past the negativity. Am I wrong in thinking that this board is for us? If they (the jw's) come here, then they'll see we are real.
In regard to the sex threads, that too is something we've NEVER been able to talk about freely. At times we do get carried away, for whatever reason. I think we should have a specific place (the password idea is a good one) in the forum for those topics. If someone complains, tell them to leave--it's their choice. The pictures don't have to be graphic here--there are definitely many places they can go to for that.
It just seems IMHO that it's way to easy for people to complain about topics and such, and that's a little too close to our old way of thinking--"if I don't like it, it must be wrong". When jw's come here, they may not always find HAPPY people here--it takes a while to get to that point. But if they stick around, they'll realize that we are at least THINKING, and that in itself is a huge step.
Thanks for the opportunity to express my opinion here. I personally don't want to offend anyone on purpose, but I do hope I'm free to talk about things we were never allowed to talk about before.
Becky
since the sept. 15th 1983. watchtower about "how to treat disfellowshiped ones", no change in policy has taken place.. in spite of this....many ex-dubs still have family members who still smile, wave, or talk to us.....why?
did they forget the policy?
do they have their own opinion on how tht handle this?
Hi all,
Although I've not been da'd or df'd either, my parents definitely know my view on the borg, and still talk to me too. Don't get me wrong--I wasn't invited to my brother's wedding (his request), and I don't get a lot of phone calls from them. But still--they do talk to me, and are upset when I choose to limit my association with them--for my own sanity.
As far as whether or not to confront them with it, it will depend on the situation. Sometimes I think that conversations like that help break thru the cognitive dissonance. They won't like it at first, but it does start the mind thinking for a change. Just my 2 cents worth,
Becky
i want justice.
but, not in the typical sense.... my life has brought to me many ups and downs, and at times the downs seemed to far out weigh the ups.
maybe in my past life i reaped a lot of bad karma and now i am paying for it, or perhaps i am getting all of my bad luck over with early in life ---- who knows.... but either way, i want justice, and something tells me it is going to happen... soon... i feel things changing.. since me and my ex have split, i have dated several guys.
Amanda,
What a beautiful post! I too can relate to your connection to your ex-husband. My ex and I are the best of friends, but aren't supposed to be together now. We both have since moved on in our personal lives, and are much happier and healthier for it.
I think I read that you are in your mid-twenties online somewhere, so if it doesn't happen right away don't despair. I was almost 34 before I found my other half--and it was while I was finally learning to let go, and love myself. If you are already learning that, then you'll be much more ready for it when it comes along.
It sounds as if you have come a long way in your personal quest. I too think that we meet and end up with people for a reason; and when it's time, it's ok to let go and move forward. And if you feel that you are going to meet someone again with whom you have a much higher and deeper connection, than you will. I did, and it was worth the wait. I hope I'm around when it happens for you!
Love,
Becky
i'm sure many have seen these at some time:.
http://www.bethelcoachtours.com/english.htm.
i just noticed on their site that they claim:.
Hey Simon,
Great post! I've already been talking to some other ex's about visiting Brooklyn in about a month or so. I've been 2 times, about 5 years ago. I'd love to go to NY now though since I'm not a jw anymore. I think I'll enjoy the "city that never sleeps" much more now... If anyone would be interested in visiting, email me and let's come up with some good ideas. For some reason I'd love to go again now that I'm out!
Becky
i just recently read a post on another board where a person claiming to be a witness claims that she called the society as was informed by them that it was all right to have one's own blood stored for future use.
anyone else heard of this?
am i just slipping behind the times or could she be mistaken about the matter?
Hi Frenchy,
Yup, you got it right! You can look on the society's official website. I just read it there the other day. It basically said there are no scriptural objections, it's a conscience matter.
Hmmm...I can't remember what the site is--someone help!
Becky
what better way to join the board than jumping in with both feet?
(sorry if it's too long).
my experience is somewhat similar to the ones i've read here.
Zam,
What an experience you've had! And it's nice to read that you have learned from the past, instead of letting it control you. I think that even though your past actions may be controversial to some, they obviously had the correct effect for you--you are out now!
Congratulations on your new life and family, and welcome to the board.
Becky
