Why is it so hard to have meaningful conversation at the Kingdom Hall?

by truthseeker 32 Replies latest jw friends

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  truthseeker

  Did any of you stuggle for have good conversations with the friends, before and after meetings? I know I did.

  By meaningful conversations, I mean in-depth discussions about events, news, beliefs. It seems that JW's

  are very awkward socially and cannot keep an attention span of more than 2 minutes.

  If you are still going to meetings, try seeing how long you can talk about one subject for - it will rarely be more

  than 2 minutes, unless you have met someone who likes to talk. Watch as their eyes glaze over, and then notice

  how they look over your shoulder to see the next person on their list.

  They remind me of bees going to nectar - a few seconds on one flower and then on to the next. Even at social gatherings,

  it's very hard to get people to talk and really open up.

  In short, the kind of friendships you have with brothers and sisters could probably be defined as transitory at best.
• 

  Soledad

  conversations? what conversations?

  I was constantly lectured to by the elders, elderettes, MS's and pioneers.

  That was not in any way shape or form meaningful conversation.
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  Finally-Free

  I noticed this, and actually timed some of the conversations I managed to get in to. Few lasted more than 3 minutes. I suspect it was a result of reduced attention span caused by the structure of the watchtower study, which makes it difficult for people to concentrate on more than one paragraph at a time.

  W
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  truthseeker

  Interesting comments.

  Have you noticed how easy it is to talk about sports, movies or eating out than it is to talk about the New System, Armaggedon or doctrinal

  beliefs. The JW youth don't seem the slightest bit interested in their DOCTRINAL beliefs, yet they make all the effort to answer up and

  volunteer.
• 

  Finally-Free

  I think eating out was the most popular subject - but it was mostly arguing about where to go after the meeting. Hockey was another good one. Usually I took an opposing viewpoint just to make it interesting.

  W
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  stillAwitness

  You know what now that I think about it u are right truth seeker. Hmm. And I thought it was me. I think all of that has a lot to do wit your prominence in the hall. Why waste your time talkin to Sis. what's her face when ohhh....Bro Brown who is an elder and former bethelite is standing by the water fountain with no takers. Beat it Sis. What's her face! I never see you onstage giving an expierence anyway!!!
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  tall penguin

  My guess is that it's a fear of judgement thing. Who wants to disclose their personal likes, dislikes, opinions, etc. when you could be judged for it? It's just not worth it.
  tp
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  Finally-Free

  My guess is that it's a fear of judgement thing. Who wants to disclose their personal likes, dislikes, opinions, etc. when you could be judged for it? It's just not worth it.

  I think there's a lot to this statement. I was forever getting counselled for spending time on "outside interests". I soon learned to avoid speaking about any interests or hobbies I had. I'm sure others did the same.

  W
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  Ingenuous

  Why is it so hard?

  In addition to the holier-than-thou comments ("Oh, I'm so busy with service and studying, I don't have time for..."), there's also the fact that in many places, whatever you say will get back to you at some point - probably significantly modified from the original. I don't think half the people at the Halls I've been to would have any conversation if it weren't for gossip and betrayed confidences.
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  hillbilly

  in-depth discussions about events, news, beliefs

  Beliefs... you already know what you know. Any serious discussion will lead to speculation or *gasp* apostacy....30 seconds

  Events...all events are keyed to "the world" or politics... You are no part of the world and neutral. Your kids only do well at school to "honor the King"..every thing other than "beliefs" is a "vanity"......30 seconds

  News... the only news that matters is what can be twisted around to support beliefs..."Hurricane?", Yep!..we are CLOSE to the end ..just around the corner I tell ya!"..................30 seconds.

  The stuff you can talk about (drinking, sex and sports) shouldnt be discussed at the Kingdom Hall. You shouldnt even pick up youre Mary Kay or Tupperware at the meeting to save a trip.

  I come up with a minute and a half.

  ~Hill