The reason I arrived, and why I'm still here...

by OldSoul 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff
    I have been eager to see whether anyone would follow the counsel in Jude to try and snatch me out of the fire, but most JWs expect to be combatting false doctrine and seem to be taken off guard when someone honestly doubts that they are teaching true doctrine.

    I mentioned that scripture to a prom elder in our congregation when I saw that the dogmatic style was getting to be too much to bear. I had been 'counseled' for making comments in the Watchtower study that did not go along with the paragraphs.

    I asked him why I was being 'beat up' instead of applying Jude's direction to 'snatch me out of the fire' - he did not answer except to say I was treading on thin-ice and that Jude's words did not apply in this case and circumstance.

    Since leaving only a gossip trail has followed - no one, even my close companions of nearly 4 decades has even bothered to try and keep me in - I have just been an object of fear to them, that they might too abandon the 'truth' if they get to close. The conditionality of the love has been appalling to say the least. I do not expect it is much different anywhere in the org.

    Jeff

  • bebu
    bebu

    I have a friend who is a JW, and became stuck in eddies of JW arguments when we discussed religion. I arrived to learn as much as possible about how JWs think, and how people's thought processes worked while they were leaving the cult. I got to know some people here... and stuck around! I've been encouraged to see how (ex)JWs CAN think, and I've been so angered to learn about the scandals and the shunning and the abuse. I stick around to give a little encouragement, mostly. Also to toss in perspectives on occasion.

    I have to tell you that your posts, OS, are one of the things I really enjoy reading now. You are very refreshing to read and very perceptive. I can't understand how you could have kept on as a JW for as long as you did.

    bebu

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I echo your thoughts, Bebu. There are some awfully nice ex-JW's out there. I asked Blondie's husband, Irreverent, (one of my favorite men of all time) why he stayed in it so long. He became pensive, "Good question." I think a lot of nice people DO stay longer than they have to, maybe hoping they can make a difference...

  • kls
    kls

    Good for you my friend . That is why many that have left the cult do, is feel the need to help others with their pain and make their learning and leaving the jws with as little pain as possible. Many have unaswered questions that eat at them and need so much the support of others like us and just to know we do care and feel their pain.

    Cheers my friend

  • OldSoul
    OldSoul

    Wheaties, Bebu. Wheaties.

    It has been difficult. I have done it for family and friends, trying to wake them up for years now. I did not want to follow impulses to leave until I had a rock solid reason to leave, that is, until I could support that decision by their own dogma. A recent Association has provided such a reason.

    That also was for family and friends. If I can leave while clearly choosing on right grounds (in their estimation) it will unsettle them more each time they think of me. Maybe they will start thinking before they die 20-60 years from now in this system, still clinging to false hope under the guidance of the "Nethinim."

    Least I could do is try. My love is genuine and unconditional whether their's is or not.

    Respectfully,
    OldSoul

  • Legolas
    Legolas
    Why did you arrive? Why are you still here?

    I came here to get help and to give it!

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    hear hear OS!

    nicely written. it's nice to get to know you a little better. i hope to meet you someday in person.

    keep on trucking,

    TS

  • I quit!
    I quit!
    I watched for about an hour, hardly believing how boldly people were speaking. I was used to doing that but the people close to me are never comfortable with it, hence I was a male, and "just a publisher" at 30. In JW land, there must be something wrong with you.

    There was something wrong with you Old Soul, you weren't lemmimg like enough to progress in the "truth". An elder can be a good person and a nice guy or a guy or a mean spirited person who beats his wife and treats his family badly. With the WT it is all about conformity. They are looking for company men. It is all about control.

    Oh, and Jeff the above applies to you also.

    And another thing Jeff. What didn't you understand about the Watchtower indoctrination study? They ask you a question and quite clearly point out the answer they want you to give. I don't know how they could make it any more simple unless they came out with pre-underlined Watchtowers. Hey, now there's a thought.

    As for witnesses not trying to save you from distruction. I had about 400 witnesses at my wedding. Not one of them or any other JW I knew made any effort to even ask me why I was leaving. In one day you go from having what you thought were hundreds of friends to none. (In the dub world that is). I think many witness their lives in fear of stepping out of line. They know that in one day the house of cards they have built can fall so they just pretend all is well in the kingdom. It really is a sad pathetic way of life.

    My advise is always RUN FOR THE DOOR!!!

  • wanderlustguy
    wanderlustguy
    I am still here because there is a matter of honor I feel compelled to fulfill. I have benefitted from this place so much that I feel bound to help others benefit.

    Well said. I remember almost a year ago now when I came here. Now I view everything differently, but still I cannot get rid of the feeling of responsibility to those who are like I once was. Sometimes I wish I could do as some say, have no feelings of responsibility at all about any of it, but I just can't do that.

    I used to think the newbies needed me, but that's not true and it gives ME too much credit. They need us, they need some of us to stay after we could go, if only to offer them a hand up out of the hell they are living in.

    WLG

  • candidlynuts
    candidlynuts

    good post OS.

    i've said before, people ARE helped here.. suicides have been averted because of the compassion and understanding found here.

    lady lee's abuse recovery posts have helped me personally in a big way (thank you again dear lady!)

    understanding pm's from some who recognize that i'm still in a lot of emotional pain and turmoil some days lift my spirits

    having a place to laugh is a gift!

    having a place to get input on where i'm at now, where some have been before me, is priceless!

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