help! what does a jw say to the elders about DOUBTS?

by Cordelia 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Cordelia
    Cordelia

    my friend has been struggling in the 'truth' for a while, she was never really a model jw and since ive been dfed and her little sister was abused shes wanted to leave but cant seem to find the way to do it.

    so she rung me today and told me she is meeting with the elders (two i think) as she has told them she has questions and wants answers.

    i think her overall hope is that they dont answer her questions and she finds the strength to leave! (she says sometimes shed like them to df her but i think thats just coz she wants to go so much!

    anyway she hasnt axcess to a computer but i would love to show her your comments show her she is right to have doubts, but does anyone have any advice on taking their doubts to the elders (will she get dfed for that) and is there any really GOOD things she can (innocently) say to really tie them in knots??

    please help x

  • willyloman
    willyloman
    does anyone have any advice on taking their doubts to the elders (will she get dfed for that) and is there any really GOOD things she can (innocently) say to really tie them in knots??

    Ask your friend this: Suppose you were a Catholic and found out the priest was molesting your son. Would you go to that priest and confess your sins and ask for advice? Or would you listen to your instincts?

  • minimus
    minimus

    Leave as quickly as possible. Don't ask them anything or else d'fing will occur. Think out things on your own. Do research. It will all be obvious!

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I would use the "dont ask no tell" policy but it's too late for that I guess

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    Well, I don't know the circumstances of the person you mention. But you are in a very difficult position yourself with *certain* relatives being in *certain* positions in the congregation which changes and complicates everything IMO.

    My honest advice to your friend would be simply "don't bother". What is her objective? To try and convert the whole congregation? You could get some of the best people off this board to sit down with the elders and chances are the elders would still not "hear" through their blinkered reasoning.

    Maybe she just wants to "make a point" about leaving. If that is the case she should ask if there is any point to doing that. By meeting with the elders she is still shackled to the power they hold over her.

    If you're looking for points to show your friend for her own reasons, you're best off printing off a load of stuff from freeminds site rather than a message board to be honest.

    Hope this helps.

  • Cordelia
    Cordelia

    thanks everyone thats what i told her.

    thing is she seems to want to be dfed as she thinks she will never leave otherwise! i dont think they will df her i think they may try and answer her questions (am i being stupid?) but she was just gonna say things like 'i dont agree with my friend being dfed or my sister being abused' etc

    and i think she needs to ask geniune questions about the beliefs if she wants to be dfed am i right?

  • jaffacake
    jaffacake

    If she wants to be df'd I suggest she ask questions they cannot answer truthfully without exposing the falsehood of their religion. If she concentrates on Watchtower publications, past truths etc her motives will be questioned & she may be accused of listening to apostates. I have many questions they failed to answer and hid from my JW friends out of fear of my questions.

    If you pm me with an email address I could send some lines of questioning, if she really wants disfellowhip eg:

    Book – God’s Kingdom Has Approached (F Franz) chap. 17 pp. 349-357 The “Slave” Who Lived to See the “Sign” ***

    TIME OF INSPECTION BY THE SLAVE’S MASTER

    38 Without a question of doubt, it was a real time for inspection of the Master’s “slave” class. All the facts of the case argue that the Master came for the work of inspection at the time. …Had his appointed slave done as he was assigned to do, namely, give to the “domestics” their “food at the proper time”? The master needed to make an inspection.

    40 The serving of food, the right sort of food, at the proper time was the issue. It had to be according to this that a decision must be rendered by the returned master….Down to 1919 C.E. they had endeavored to give “food at the proper time”…. Not only was the regularity in serving the spiritual food a problem, but the quality of the food itself was to be considered….

    APPOINTED OVER ALL THE MASTER’S BELONGINGS

    ….. When he returned to his “household staff” in 1919 to make an inspection of all his “domestics,” he did so in a royal capacity ….

    51 On inspecting the remnant of his anointed disciples in the year 1919 C.E., the reigning King Jesus Christ did find the appointed “slave” faithful and discreet in the feeding of his “domestics.” Accordingly, he appointed this “slave” class over all his belongings.

    Please use the link to check just a small sample of the quality of spiritual food that led to the appointment by Christ of the FDS in 1919:

    http://www.bibletopics.com/biblestudy/88.htm

  • thom
    thom

    I think you're right about they type of questions you think she's going to ask. I would think the elders would just take it as someone looking for excuses unless she brings out stuff that really show the dishonesty of the org.

  • Cordelia
    Cordelia

    thanks ballistic nice to hear from u,

    jaffa i cant pm its not working properly but my email is [email protected] i would really appreciate u giving me some things to tell her.

    i thought if she wanted to get dfed she should concerntrate on the un 607 etc but they would prob know its come from me (and im not sure how i feel about that!) but i want to help her the best way i can she defo doesnt want to be talked round not sure of the best way to go.

  • ballistic
    ballistic


    Cordelia, you are not really seeing the point of what I said.

    You're suggesting she talks to the elders about 607? They are so not going to listen to her. If she wants to get disfellowshipped she can just send a letter asking to be disassociated. What is so complicated?

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