Got a letter from my parents...

by Krystal 31 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  Scully

  I wonder what their reaction will be when I get married and an invitation arrives in their mailbox...

  Why not spare yourself the trouble, and just do one of those Caribbean weddings on the beach kind of things? You can send them an announcement after the fact, saying that you decided to elope. With half a dozen of your closest friends there to share your joy.

  As far as funerals go, don't be surprised if you don't hear about it in time to attend either. I found out about one of my grandparent's death that way, in a two line email, no less. To top it off, none of my grandparents were JWs either.
• 

  TooOpinionated

  Ooooh, the more I think about this the madder I get. It's is mean-spirited to rub salt in the wound. I would write them a letter (and put tracking on it so you know it was delivered) and ask them what kind of religion (and individual) gets a perverse satisfaction in blatant emotional blackmail and cruelty, and tell them how evil it is. Put the wrong motives right back on them. They deserve it for being so heartless. Natural familial feelings are suspended on their part, so don't play into their hands by showing hurt. Sometimes well-placed self-righteous anger is necessary.

  JMHO

  (Ok, so I'm no Dear Abby!)
• 

  bikerchic

  (((((((((((Krystal))))))))))

  I'm sorry for your hurt, emotional blackmail is really cruel! Shame, shame on them! Just don't do it back to them in fact go out of your way to be kind. Send them a wedding invite with plenty of time for them to accept or decline, be grown up about life and deal with what is.

  It would also be a huge kindness to send your Grandmother a lovely bouquet of flowers and a card to let her know you care and are thinking about her.

  I've recently gone through a similar situation so I know too well the deep hurt and my heart goes out to you, just remember it's not about you it's about them and their mindless religion.

  Chin up!
• 

  GetBusyLiving

  ((Krystal)) ((Elsewhere))

  For me Jehovah's Witnesses only get so much brainwash leeway, and its damn well not much. I can understand that some people have weak brains and accept everything the Watchtower tells them to do, including shunning. After that, F*CK THEM and the horse they rode in on. Anyone, ANYONE who would treat me the way both of you have been treated would never get forgiveness from me, even if they drop out of the cult one day. If a person doesn't have the sense to realize how wrong it is to act that way and are so heartless would never get an ounce of my sympathy.

  GBL
• 

  Purza

  OMG Krystal and

  OMG Elsewhere

  Why does this stuff shock me anymore? I have righteous anger for both of you as you were both wronged. This makes me hate the JW religion even more because of the control they exert over their members. My parents did not attend my wedding are are too "busy" for me nowadays. I have managed to drop them from my mind, but every once in awhile my heart gets in the way.

  I honestly do not know what I would do if I was Krystal. Do you acknowledge their nastiness? Or do you do something back to inflict pain on them? It really is a tough call. My heart goes out to you.

  ((((((Krystal)))))))

  ((((((Elsewhere)))))))

  Purza
• 

  Finally-Free

  Do you acknowledge their nastiness? Or do you do something back to inflict pain on them?

  I say inflict a little pain. Aren't they the ones who approve of the "rod of discipline"? Maybe it's their turn to learn something from it.

  W
• 

  defd

  Look at the positive. At least they acknowledged you and imformed you of those events.
• 

  jgnat

  I like the ideas of flowers for grandma. See if you can find another way (besides family) to keep abreast of grandma's condition. Like Scully says, I wouldn't put it past them to tell you about the funeral after the fact as well.

  I don't think this is time for revenge. Simple kindness kills evil.
• 

  ChrisVance

  GBL

  Anyone, ANYONE who would treat me the way both of you have been treated would never get forgiveness from me, even if they drop out of the cult one day. If a person doesn't have the sense to realize how wrong it is to act that way and are so heartless would never get an ounce of my sympathy.

  I've often had the same thought; however, I also wonder how I would react if one of my family members left the dubs and wanted to resume contact. Would I feel that strongly about then? Don't know.
• 

  Apostanator

  Krystal,

  I am so sorry to hear that happened to you. I can truly say I understand, as I'm going through ( and have gone through ) the same shenanigans as you are. I can't help but think, What was the purpose of sending that letter to you? It is just disturbing to see family members treat you that way !!!! I hope you'll be able to find some kind of resolution.

  Best Wishes