New here - hello, especially to Lyineyes

by regnig 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • regnig

    Hello...I'm Ginger, Lyineyes' (Dede) little sister and she is and has always been my everything. I respect her and love her more than anything else I've ever known. She introduced me to my true love Donnie (Wanderlustguy) seven years ago, and didn't even didn't know it at the time. Back then I was sent away, by my cruel, evil JW Step-Monster who was insanely jealous of me for looking like my dead JW Mother, who she so conveniently replaced. (Being a young, pretty sister in need of spiritual guidance and all) by my father, Super Stud Deep Pockets Elder, who only needed Sister-in-Need with hot pants to make his life complete. I began looking to my older sister as everything in life to trust and depend on as early as I can remember. She put diapers on me and fed me and even spanked me when I needed it, cause Elder Studly deep pockets, was too busy to be there for his real family. So, my only "TRUTH", came from seeing my older (by three years) sister, take on all family household responsibilities, because no one else would at the time. We shared beatings, trying to learn how to cook food for one another, cleaning, all life’s necessities together because we had no one else. We depended solely on each other for love and comfort, food and support, fun and mental stability. Dede is my savior, if anyone is be called such a thing, she is totally deserving of such a title. She gave of herself so many times to make sure "baby-sister" was taken care of, that without her I would not be here today reading from others just like me or giving the thanks to the one who truly deserves it. My wonderful, big brown-eyed sister "lyingyeyes", without whom I wouldn't be here today. She sheltered me from so much hate, anger and pain. I still remember and have scars from family wars that I couldn't go to school from. I got a T.V. from one scar that cut across my ribs about the same time that "Indiana Jones" came out and my sister I had dish duty, I washed grease down the sink and got the beating of my life with a new "bull whip" momma bought, trying to be like the movie hero. I still have the scar on my right rib cage from my momma acting out her wild movie fantasies and I bled for hours. My Super Stud elder father didn't say two words to her for chastising me so hard over grease being poured down the sink in January, (like I knew it would harden like a damn candle) at only 7 years of age. I thought I was helping my big sister and instead got out of school for several days for the intense bruising. I kept quiet though, it got me out of school and a new 12" T.V. I felt I got the better of the deal, but I'm 35 now and still have the scar and don't know where that T.V. is to this day. After all the battles with our mother's health and almost losing her in '84, we lost her anyway in '85 either by her own hand or my fathers' influence. Either way my older sister and I had to identify our own mother's lifeless body, after they pulled it from the River. Not Super Stud elder, but his two daughters had this incredible burden to carry, because they were divorced and no one else cared to stand in as an adult who wanted to spare these children his life changing, soul crushing experience. Therefore another reason, I owe my life and sanity to my older sister, "lyineyes". She was there, stood beside me as we made all the arrangements and even put the right make up on our mother to be buried when not one of the "local congregation" acted like they knew us. No one attended, "due to the circumstances" of Sister Davis' s death, " Blah, Blah, Blah, no one I knew my whole damn life showed up to pay this poor woman respects, (after all my daddy's hundred of thousands of dollars went in to at least 8 kingdom halls I can name off hand), how could no one show up to her funeral? After all, brother Davis was still alive and so were his millions. Even though he cheated on our sick mother, who desperately needed all the help she could get and left us kids to sink or swim while he filled his needs with "sister with spiritual needs" We were left alone to fend for ourselves as usual. Only my sister and me to hold each other together. My sister knows how I feel about her, but yall don't, without her, I wouldn't be here. She held me when I cried, fed me when I was hungry and loved me when I was all alone and her only being 3 years older. She gave so much of herself, to me, all she had and for that I will always be eternally grateful and now I have my one true love, who loved me when I was nothing, still loves me because I make him feel something wonderful and hopeful, tells me my "Big" sister did something Damn Right! Thank you "Big Sister" you know how much I love you and need you in my life, we may not have momma and daddy anymore, but we have always had each other. I Love you and will always. A Savior is one who saves someone, simple saying I know, but it's true, you save me out of love and I will always love and look up to you for the rest of my life. I love you with all my heart, I know together we will lean on each other to mend the pain and erase the scars from our upbringing and past. We will have the love and life we deserve after so much suffering at the hands of those we were taught to be quiet and listen to. I only listen to you and my own heart now. You taught me that, I love and thank you for being such a gift to me.

    I love you!


  • wanderlustguy

    Welcome home.

  • HappyDad


    Welcome to the forum and thank you for the loving tribute to your sister. Ya kinda got me choked up girl!

    I wish you and WLG a happy life together.


  • prophecor

    Hi Regnig. WLG has painted such a touching picture with regard to how he feels for you. Believing that he had lost you 4vr, only to find you after so much pain and turmoil, being eternally grateful that he's been given another chance to win you back into his life.

    I've followed your lives closely as he presented it to the community. It's good to, finally, be able to hear things from your side of the story. He makes believing one can truly find ones soul mate in life a reality.


  • greendawn

    Welcome to the board, it's great that you have such a supportive sister.

  • lisavegas420

    I'm glad you two have each other. How wonderful indeed it must be to have that kind of love.

    I miss my sister. It has been years since I've seen or heard from her.


  • wanderlustguy


    Sorry I didn;t say more last night, it was late. This place is so great for healing, like the way you started out saying hello, and then by the end of your post you were furiously pounding the keys from the emotion you felt reliving those parts of your life.

    You said to me "Who am I to say anything, it's not my place". What makes it ok it everyone here has some hurt from what we all went through, even if it's not exactly the same. But there may also be some lurking here that see something you say, and it triggers something in them that helps them get out, or at least realize they aren't alone.

    Also, it's amazing how much better you feel after unloading here, to people that understand. I don't really know how to explain it, I guess maybe validation is a good term. I know the more people here have told me I'm ok, even after I post my true feelings about things, or when I read about something someone else went through, it helps me so much.

    I love you and hope you find healing here like I have.


  • MerryMagdalene

    O man o man o man...thank you for sharing that with us. Your entwined stories have moved through such tragedy and hope, pain and beauty. To see love present through it all is most inspiring. I think all of us here who remember when Wanderlustguy first shared his story with us have been overjoyed to see him reunited with the love of his life!!!

    Thank you for introducing yourself to us Regnig/Ginger. We embrace you with open arms, caring hearts and tear-streaked faces.


  • Sunspot

    A most hearty WELCOME and a warm hello, regnig!

    Having read all (I think all) the posts about you, WLG and Dede, I feel as if I've known you quite a while!

    I am thrilled at how your life has turned around despite a pretty fragile upbringing. Dede is a very special person, and we would not have known this until you and Donnie let us in on it.

    I admire all three of you immensely and appreciate having you share all these things with the rest of us here. We hope to see many more posts from you as you settle into being on this great board!

    BIG HUGS are being sent your way......


  • LyinEyes

    Ginger, thanks for the things you said , you know".. I love you more than my luggage!!"

    I have been on this board for about 3 years and have told so many painful stories and shared many of the good things in my life, like the kids as well.

    At first I was hurting so much ,,,,,,,with all the JW things, you know losing my religion hurt me almost as bad as losing Mama. Maybe in some way it hurt worse if that makes sense. I lost my faith, and most of all my hope. I lost who I thought I was. I learned how to accept myself without the idenitity of a religion ,and I have healed , but the scars will always be there. I don't mind the scars, it just reminds me that time does heal, but we don't forget, but we do get stronger.

    You have alot of healing to do Gin, and you will . Just write what you want,,,,,,,,you know I have always loved writing, it really does make you feel better. It has helped me so much to express myself freely here.

    Well, got to run,,,,,,,,,,,,,,I love you and always will,,,,,,,,you are very much missed here in hot as hades , Louisiana!! Hope to see you soon!!

    Hugs to you and Donnie,,,,,,,,,,,,Your seeeeeeeeeester, Dede

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