My brother wants to talk to me about why I left the org. He is JW.

by avengers 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • avengers
    avengers

    As many of you know I live in Holland.
    I'm visiting the US now and my brother who is now at the convention
    in Tacoma WA wants to talk to me about the reason why I left the org.

    Actually I'd like to, but what I'm afraid of is that it will turn into an argument,
    which I really don't want. He and his wife are really gung ho dubbies and
    anything that does not agree with their line of thought is considered from Satan.

    I don't know if any of you had success in talking to gung ho dubbs.
    If so, then I could sure use your advice.

    He, (my brother) is the one interested in why I left. I did not approach him.
    Maybe it's a way of trying to get me back in, which will happen when hell freezes over.

    So I'm curious about what will happen.

    I'll keep ya all posted.

    Andy.

  • luna2
    luna2

    Good luck to you! It does rather sound like a fight waiting to happen....unless he's having doubts?? Otherwise, I wouldn't be surprised if he got all fired up at the convention and wants to "save" you.

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    If they are really fanatical and impervious to rational thinking there is nothing you can do to reason with them, they will not be able to use their critical faculty due to the jw mind conditioning.

    Otherwise hit them with hard hitting facts such as the failed prophecies, the fear of the GB to come out of their ivory tower and face their critics, the flip flopping dogmas.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    I'm for giving Witnesses making contact a cautious ear. If they are calling to make amends I want to give them that opportunity. I don't talk about religion or Witnessism with a believing Witness ever. I'd rather keep rapport with them than prove to myself I'm right.
    (1.) They'll never convince me they're right, and I'll never convince them they aren't right.
    (2.) I really don't care about them.
    (3.) They don't need me.
    (4.) Everything I know about the Witness group, they can learn in a couple days on the web.
    (5.) I don't enjoy talking religion with Witnesses.



  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    I guess I'd test the waters by asking a question like, "So, what do you want to know?"

    "Well," he might say, "we want to know why you left the organization."

    Then you can offer ONE factor. You want to see how he responds to it.

    If he gets all defensive on behalf of the watchtower, he's probably not ready for further discussion. If he tends to agree with you, or shows himself open to reasoning, continue.

    Have you been disfelowshipped?

    Is it possible that your brother wants to impose this "loving arrangement" on you by force?

  • blondie
    blondie

    I take it if he is hosting you in his home and he is a loyal JW, Avengers, you are neither DF'd or DA'd; are you inactive then?

    If so, do you think by talking to him about your reasons, that it might mean that he will no longer have any contact with you?

    I personally, would never discuss anything with my family because I know they aren't interested for the right reasons.

    He's your family and only you know if it would do any good, get him to thinking.

    Blondie

  • avengers
    avengers

    Thanks to all of you for your excellent advice.

    My brother who is at the convention is not the one hosting me at his house.
    I have 5 brothers. One of my other brothers is hosting me at his house.
    He is also hosting the JDubb brother, his wife and another ladyDubb.
    They'll be coming home tonight, all fired up because of some new light
    which is supposed to be presented at the convention. (not that I give a hoot.)

    Isn't the theme of the convention: "Godly Obedience".
    When I saw the name tag it immediately reminded me of; obedience is something you
    teach a dog, not a free spirit. And I ain't no dog.

    Well, I'm off to Seattle rightnow. I'll see my brother later tonight.

    I will tell you all the outcome tomorrow.

    Andy

  • SeymourButts
    SeymourButts

    Make sure you lay out a few ground rules before you begin. I will talk to anyone, but I make them agree to a few simple rules before we start.

    Remind him of how the society and God view those that make false accusations. Make him agree to prove you are telling lies before he can label you as an apostate or liar. You also need to agree on what the definition of an apostate is. Make him agree that someone who tells the truth in a matter can't be an apostate.

    If you are going to discuss the societies claim of divine inspiration, you need to agree on the definition of a prophet beforehand. Don't wait until you are in the middle of a discussion and then try to agree on the definition. Do it first before you talk about anything. Write it down if you need to so that he can't go back and say, "I didn't say that."

    No getting mad and walking out either. "If you want to know what I have to say, you have to stay until I am finished."

    Don't discuss doctrinal issues that depend on interpretation, this only leads to argument. Talk about things like the U.N., Bulgaria, various misquotes (creation book is best for this), Rand Cam, etc.... Stay away from 607bc unless you are fully prepared to refute the Kingdom Come book and other misc. articles.

    Just a few of the tips that work for me.

  • JamesThomas
    JamesThomas

    What I tell my Jehovah's Witness relatives is the truth. Which is that I have searched my heart and found that in standing fast to inner integrity I find it impossible to honestly and truly love a god who would kill or punish me if I don't (love him) - and God deserves nothing less than true love, and I love God too much to lie.

    This paradoxical reply, is why I can not stand by Jehovah's Witness beliefs. Why I do not buy into any religious dogma. I love God too much to be religious and make God into a tiny thing or object which I must appease by other means than the simplicity of my heart. End of story.

    This pretty much leaves them speechless, and hopefully motivates them to examine their hearts, love and beliefs as well. However, they act afraid, as if to look at me requires they look at themselves; something they seemingly find painful to do.

    j

  • skyman
    skyman

    Yes I have had great sucess talking to the DUBS. Most say the UN deal is untrue and will not talk you. So I ask them to listen in while I can the Information Deptment and while they are on an other phone I ask all the hard questions about the Society joining the UN. This works because they hear from the Society information dept. things they would not hear other wise. Also I am sending you a letter I call my blood letter. I have had five different Elders and one CO read this letter. One Elder quit after reading the letter and all including the CO said I was correct but needed to wait on Jehovah. Check you inbox.

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