Before I write this, I ask everyone's forgiveness and understanding. I am not saying these things to brag, but to point out what might have been. I have finally quit and my wife is leaving me because (I hate the WT much too much for her to return to me), even if our child died. I asked her last week that if our child died of suicide or anorexia (she has only an 80% chance of surviving until she turns 25 years old), how could she defend NOT moving back in with me. Her answer was my hatred of the WT and that "Jehovah will fix things in his time and that any bad elders would be punished". I did love her, but I cannot tolerate such idiotic thinking any longer.
She claimed she moved out because our child feared I would kill her because I threatened to kill the man who raped her when she was about ten years old. Why would I kill my child when I loved her so much that I wanted to kill the people who hurt her? Obviously, there were marital issues as well, which I later confirmed after receiving my degree in psychology. I know many of these facts will make it easier for the WT spies to possibly flush me out at last and DF me (I'm currently reproved), but I don't give a damn anymore. My daughter, now about 20 years old, hasn't spoken to me in 2 years and has made it plain that she isn't going to for a long time. I know she might change, but I'll have to wait.
Back to what not going to college cost. I had 3 years toward a teaching degree. I went to work to earn the money to finish. I became a JW and wanted to finish the degree, have a few kids, and have my wife quit her job forever (in the medical field). I would have been a principal or university professor by now. I love school and became a network engineer and taught at a computer school for years and won many awards and was promoted to the position over all the other instructors (over 30 of them). I play several musical instruments well enough to have taught them for a living. I was student conductor in high school and started to write a symphony at the age of 16. My IQ tested at 150 and this opened many doors of opportunity to me. My wife was working hard already after 2 years of marriage (no child yet) because I worked part-time so I could be a servant. She never complained once that I should give up all of my privileges and get a better job so she would have an easier life. Believe me, I wanted to. I asked the PO what I had to do to qualify to go from being a MS to an elder. He said to keep doing what I was doing. I mentioned college and buying a house and he unloaded on me about this being Satanic. (Yet his children all went to college and he bought a big house in San Diego shortly afterwards.)
My wife to this day throws in my face that she earned more money than I did. Yet whenever she was complimented on having a husband who was a book study conductor because the elders wanted to use me (although there were elders who didn't have a book study), being the school counselor for the school in the back room (rarely given to a non-elder), and many other privileges, her smile of pride went from ear to ear. I can't stand the hypocrisy any longer. If I had gone to college, she and the elders would have been on my case. When I did what the WT said, she resented having to work. After 7 years of marriage, we decided to have a child, which added more work to her life. I also got blamed for that.
How do you reason with this kind of thinking? How do you keep from punching an elder in the nose who said, "I've been in the truth since the late 1980's, and I've never heard of any ban on college." What a jackass. Well, I've been around JW's since 1971 and I DO remember the WT's attitude about college. My father is so happy that I quit this "sick, child-raping cult". He mourns for the wasted 30 years of my life and what I could have become if I had pursued my abilities. I now intend to get my master's and then doctorate, write books about WT child abuse, and to become a therapist. Better late than never. I'd be eager to hear of any other person's story if you endured something similar. And again, please, I am not writing this because of pride or to brag. I am just trying to show what could have been versus the jobs I did end up with (school bus driver, clerk, minimum wage, etc.) I thank anyone in advance for posting anything concerning this topic.
