A joke - Who alredy had a belly ache?

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Petruska

Who already had a belly ache, knows as it is... this is a simple history that could have happened with you...

The airplane would leave at 16h30m. Entering in bus, without sanitary, I felt the first contraction and I took conscience of that my fecal pregnancy arrives at the nineth month and that it would make a childbirth squatting thus that entered in wc of the airport. I turned over for my friend who followed me and, said to him: "Fire, badly I can wait to arrive in the excrement of the airport because necessary to release the sausage." At this moment, I felt the big shit to pinch my underwear’s, but I put the will force to work and held the wave. Neither bus nor had started to walk when for my desperation, a voice said for the laudspeaker: "Ladies and gentlemen, had to the much transit, our trip until the o airport will lead about 1 hour". There the big shit was crazy wanting to leave to any cost! I made a miracle effort to hold the excrement convoy that was for arriving in the station anus at any time. It sweated in pipes. My friend perceived e, as good friend who was, used to advantage to enjoy with me. The provisory relief lode in form of stomach bubbles indicating that, at least for the time being, the things had been made comfortable for there. It tried to distract me seeing the landscape but it only obtained to think about a bath house, not in an equal one to the one of the public sanitary, but one with a sanitary, so white and so clean that somebody could put its lunch in. The hygienic paper then: he was white and soft and with texture and perfume and... Oops! I felt a soft volume between my back and seat of bus and perceived concerned that I shited. One solid shit and long of that they give pride of father to its author. Of that it gives will to bind for the friends and loss relatives and invite him to appreciate, in the sanitary, so perfect workmanship: it would even give to display in the CCB! But, without a doubt, not in this case. I looked at for my friend, looking for a little of solidarity, and confessed to it in very serious way: "It looks like I shit my self." When my friend stopped to laugh, one five minutes later, advised it to me to be in the centre of the city, scale that bus would make for the way of the trip, and that it cleaned me in some place. But I decided that it went to follow trip, therefore now was everything under control. "That if it sandpapers, clean me in the airport," - I thought - "worse of the one than as I am I am not". Badly bus entered in movement, the colic recommenced fort. Opened the eyes, I held myself in the chair, but I could not prevent, and without much ceremonial or anunciation, it came second leads of excrement. Of this time as a folder warm. It was excrement for that side is, hot exploding and smearing cu, underwear’s, bar of the shirt, legs, pants, stockings and feet. Soon to follow, plus a colic announcing more excrement, now liquid, of that they burn softh of the customer when leaving route to the freedom. E, in the following instant, a fart farcical type, that I nor tried to hold after all... of accounts what fart for who was one already all shit. Already the following fart one was of the type that weigh and I shit me for the fourth time. I remembered a friend who, certain time was with as much shit that he decided to put one I think hygienic about the underwear’s, but placed it with the adhesive lines turns for top and, when he wanted to take off it, he took half of the coats of the together tail. But it was late excessively for such absorbent artifice. As much excrement had menstruated neither that nor a watering hole bomb could help to me to clean it the dirt. Finally I arrived at the airport and, leaving hasty with small steps, I requested to my friend who caught my luggage in the luggage of bus and he took it to the sanitary of the airport so that I could change of clothes. I ran for the bath house and entering of door in door, I evidenced the lack of hygienic paper in all the five doors. I looked at for top and I blasphemed: "Now it arrives, Shovel" I entered in the last door, exactly without paper, and took off the clothes all to analyze my situation (that it concludes as being the deep one of the well) and to wait for the luggage of the salvation, with clean clothes and smelly and it a gust of dignity in my day. However, my friend entered in the house of full bath of haste... already had made "check- in" and said me that he had that to fast go to inform flight they will wait for us. He ordered over the door the boarding pass and mine luggage of hand and left before any protest my part. It had deceived itself in the luggage that I waited and already had dispatched the luggage with clothes. In the hand luggage alone he had to pullover woollen with gullet in peak. The temperature in in this height was of approximately 37 degrees. Despaired, I started to analyze which of my clothes would be, in some way, usable. My underwear’s, I ordered for the garbage. The shirt was history. The pants were deplorable, as well as my stockings, that had moved of colour dyed by the excrement. To my shoes it gave note to them 3, in a scale of 1 the 10. It would have that to improvise. The invention is son of the necessity, and then I transformed a simple house of public bath into a magnificent machine to wash. I turned the pants the side, I held it for the bar, and dived the part reached in the water. I started to give to the push (water) until the thick one of the excrement if unfastened. He was ready to embark. I left the bathroom and I crossed the airport in direction to the embarkment gate wearing shoes without stockings, pants dressed of upside and wet of the waist until the o knee (not exacly clean) and pullover of gullet in peak without shirt. But it walked with the dignity of a lord. I embarked in the airplane, where all the passengers were to the wait of the "youngster who was in the bath house" and all crossed the corridor until the o my seat to the side of my friend who smiles. The hostess came close and asked to me if she needed something. I arrived to think about asking for one Gillette to cut the 130 pulses or towel perfumed I smell it of overflow cesspit, but I decided not to ask for them... and I answered to it with an angelical expensive diligent person: "Nothing obliged... I only wanted was to forget this SHIT day!!"

A joke - Who alredy had a belly ache?

Petruska

stevenyc

Petruska

SixofNine

skyman

Petruska

Petruska

Petruska

PaulJ

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