Did anyone ever notice just how many 30-40 year escapees there are?

by AK - Jeff 38 Replies latest jw friends

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    I know a lot of young people leave the 'truth'. But I would never have thought that so many of us with 20, 30, 40 years in would be leaving.

    What do you think accounts for that?

    I know that when the nest got empty at our house we had time to think about all the doubts we had never addressed during the busy years - is that a big part of this phenomenon?

    Jeff

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot
    What do you think accounts for that?

    It seems that it just took some of us a lot more time to smarten up!

    Seriously, I think (in my case) that the internet has a lot to do with it! We can see all the sordid facts about the WTS in private and in our own homes. The documentation is there, and it isn't from the "evil apostates" (gasp) although they are the ones who have gathered up this info so it can be looked at.

    OTOH, those that don't have computers, the changes in the WTS over the years (more demanding and tyrannical) has gotten a lot of the old-timers to thinking about the lack of love and the insincerity of the WTS. The fairly new JWs don't know about a lot of the changes in policy or the "noo lite" that has been experienced over the years.

    I too am amazed at how many of us have left or are just leaving!

  • Undecided
    Undecided

    I was just worn out with it all and just didn't care anymore about religion in my life after almost 40 years of it controlling every minute of my time.

    Ken P.

  • upside/down
    upside/down

    I'm 39....

  • luna2
    luna2

    For me it was empty nest as well as some of the changes...couldn't wrap my mind around the "new light" regarding the definition of generation for one. It was also a sense of disillusionment that comes over time.

    At first when people disappoint you or you see certain elders behaving badly, you're able to convince yourself that it's a few isolated incidents...we're all imperfect, after all. At first when it seems that every talk and every Watchtower study is a lesson in submission to the FDS, guilt, and do more, you accept it because it's new and you're eager to please. At first, when they talk about the love amongst the brothers, you believe it because they do love bomb you in the beginning and because you want so much for it to be true.

    As time passes, though, you are less and less able to keep up the "covering over". You start to see the cracks. The constant barrage of "do more" wears you down until you can't take it any more. You begin to see that their policies in regards to young people don't work very well. You encourage your kids to come forward when there's been a transgression and instead of some understanding or mercy being shown, they reprove or disfellowship them, while the kids that lie are still in good standing and not considered "bad associates". Where is the truth in that? Where is God's Holy Spirit directing the elders?

    They are so good at making garbage look like treasure that it can take a while to remove the pixie dust from your eyes and see clearly.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    luna2,

    VERY nicely said! I kept trying to single out a thought to quote so I could reply---but your entire post was great. I could relate to every bit of what you said.

    hugs,

    Annie

  • mapleaf18
    mapleaf18

    I'm with Ken P.

    Tired of the whole mess and knowing I led a very unhappy and unfulfilling life as a JW. My "never a JW boyfriend" can't understand why it took so long, but I guess if you haven't been raised a JW, knowing that that's the only way of life you have ever had, then I guess you can't fathom it.

  • catchthis
    catchthis
    is that a big part of this phenomenon?

    I was in for 30 years and I would say that the internet helped my release. For years I had questions on several doctrines but knew well enough not to push for an explanation on them because of my nature. I am the type that doesn't just accept a plain answer. I need to know the entire in's-and-out's of the answer. The internet helped me see mutiple viewpoints, both for and against, which allowed me to make a decision based on the facts, not emotions. Speaking out finally got the best of me.

  • mouthy
    mouthy

    I was in for 25 yrs. But I was kicked out with the "truth"??? still in my head !!!
    So I wasnt very smart was I? But I always say I was like a head of hair! covered with nits!! I was one of the nits! The LORD pulled me off, & cracked me!!!!& LO & Behold I came to life not as a flea!!!! as a BUG to the WT..
    THank you LORD!!!!

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    Hey, Mouthy (Grace) I cant say that I relate to your illustration, you are more valuable than that.

    As for me, baptised as a child in late 50's - turned inactive and non believing in late 90's . I guess I am just a slow learner.

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