I feel like a leper

by Wild_Thing 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • New Worldly Translation
    New Worldly Translation

    It's my hunch that what your mum said was just a misunderstanding. When you said you wouldn't go to the KH service she maybe thought that you didn't want to see any JW's at all and that's why she suggested visiting on the friday with other non-JW friends of the family. I don't think it's worth falling out over.

    My mother said something similar when my grandad died and they were having a memorial at the KH. She asked if I was going to attend or if I didn't want to bother and just go to the crematorium and pay my respects (not even sure how that would work). She asked it in a way that said she thought I had made up my mind not to go and that it didn't really matter to the family anyway. I did go of course and everything was fine in the end. It was just a misunderstanding in that my mother thought that I didn't want to see or speak to any JW's. She was extending the ludicrous JW rule of shunning on behalf of me against them even though I had no personal grievance with anyone and I wasn't even DA'd or DF'd.

    Anyway I'm sure everything will turn out ok.

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    YOU are NOT a leper, THEY are just treating you like one. BIG difference! Don't let other people's behavior affect how you feel about yourself.

  • Ellie
    Ellie

    look on the bright side, atleast your family still speak to you.

    I was never disfellowshipped, never baptized even, I only studied for about a year but because I told them very politely its not for me, my witness mother, sister and brother have not spoken to me since November.

    Also, while I was still studying, my daughter had her first birthday, my mum thought it was ok to sing happy birthday down the phone to her as no other witness' would find out but didn't send a present or card as this is going against the bible's teachings.

  • love2Bworldly
    love2Bworldly

    I can certainly empathize with you. I was disfellowshipped, reinstated, and then faded. My JW sister at first wouldn't talk to me after I faded but after our mom died a couple years later, she started just treating me like a normal relationship. However, the few times I have run into JW's that know me treat me like I'm disfellowshipped--pretend like they don't see me, or purposefully don't acknowledge my existence.

    About 6 years ago, my best friend (JW) from my teenage years called me up and asked me out to lunch. Basically it was one of those "come back before Jehovah destroys you at Armageddon" talks. I do remember her saying that other people tried to dissuade her from seeing me. I have not heard from her since, and no one from the Hall has ever tried to contact me after I faded--not even the elders.

  • Golf
    Golf

    Wild_Thing, interesting post. Don't go down to their level. Maintain your self-respect and dignity. Do what YOU think is best, your in the best position to know what to do.


    Golf

  • orangefatcat
    orangefatcat

    I feel bad for the way your being treated. Yes there are some real nasty hypocrites in the org. But then there are some who aren't intimadated by the rules and regulations. Case and point. As most of you know i am disfellowshipped and it is common knowledge in my area and surrounding congregations. This particular sister has spoke with me on many occasions when there were no other witnesses about. She is a good friend ot my mother and sisters and was one of my better friends. Anyway when I entered Sears today I saw her at a distance, there were also several other JW around her. She was working in the perfume area as do many of the sisters. Also they are in my moms and sister congregation , anyways I thought to myself will this sister speak to me even though she is surrounded by all of these sisters. True to form and not thinking twice about it she comes over to talk to me in front of all the other girls. At first I was suprised, but after having had so many previous encounters with her in the past, she was in no way hypocritical she was nice and we chated for several minutes. Some friends can't stop being friends. I know that the other sisters ignore me when I go through Sears . Now it will be interesting to see what happens in the future when I pass them in Sears. Two of the sisters have had elder husbands who are now no longer elder they were deleted. Interesting since leaving the organization how many elders in this area have been deleted .

    Are these elders finally waking up and smelling the smoke with regards to abuse? Just wondering....... Or is it burn out?

    Orangefatcat

  • avishai
    avishai

    Look at the upside. They're really the "lepers". They're the ones that isolate themselves. And they're the ones who willingly give up a part of themselves, their minds and free will. (With apologies to lepers)

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