I think in life we never really fully know or understand anything.
Brooke
Do You REALLY Know People?
by minimus 33 Replies latest jw friends
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minimus
Well then, is death the answer??
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sweet tee
I kept thinking that perhaps something was wrong with her and I wasn't there to support her. Six months went by, and then another six months. We were still e-mailing back and forth. Whenever I'd ask her to get together, she'd send me a mail saying sorry, but she had plans already. When I realized that a year had gone by, and she had not talked to me in person in a whole year, I finally stopped e-mailing her and never heard from her again.
Yes, I can figure people out, but this, I could not figure out and it still saddens me.
fairchild
I went through a similar situation with a long-time friend. One I made friends with at work during my exit from the borg. She was there for me at a time when I was going through extreme difficulties; divorce, troubles on the job with an employee who was vying for my position, financial difficulties, custody issues ... the WORKS! She and I remained very close for about 5 years then all of a sudden she became unavailable. Same scenario as yours, we only communicated through e-mails - when I'd invite her to meet for drinks or dinner she wouldn?t even respond. Finally I told her via e-mail that I didn't feel that we were friends anymore and that I guess we'd had a falling out even though I didn't know why. Her response was 'oh, we're still friends, we'll get together soon'. I've barely heard from her since.
Question: Do I really know her? I believe I do. See, this friend is a rescuer. She loves helping people figure out what to do in a crisis (enabler, co-dependent, whatever). Now that my life is on track, she doesn't have time for me because I don?t need her to help me fix things or encourage me (or so she thinks).
I allow people into my inner circle just long enough to get to know their character (or get what I think is a good perception of their character). If I find that they are not to my liking for whatever reason I can easily back out of the relationship with little regret for the time spent and move on.
Not everyone who comes into our lives will stay for the long haul. The only person you are guaranteed to have with you all or your life is yourself.
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Country Girl
Min:
There are *no* guaramtees. When we were in the religion, we were assured that we had love, and no one would mess with us, and we all found that is not true. Now that we're out, it's up in the air.
No one really knows people, unless it's themselves. We just have to have trust of people, and hope that they won't mess with us.
CG