hmmmm

missy04

I have been wondering lately..

For a while now I don't really hear from my Witness friend and not that it bothers me much anymore, but I call her like once a month or so and she usually stays on the phone long enough to tell me how much she "misses me," for like 5 minutes (as opposed to the hours that she used to call me to talk for every night.) Then she says "well I will call you later, ok?" (Of course she doesn't) I don't really feel hurt by it anymore, but it bothers me to be lied to and blown off like that.

I guess it doesn't make sense to me as to why she'd feel the need to do this? It is not like I am df'd or da'd and I was never even baptized. I guess people like me just fall into the worldly association category and should be avoided LOL

~Sarah

AlmostAtheist

I guess people like me just fall into the worldly association category and should be avoided LOL

Yep, that's it. Sorry, but that's the way the JW mindset works. She feels guilty every time she talks to you, especially if she doesn't try to attract you back to the Kingdom Hall. It's a real shame. As a JW, I blew off some "worldly" people that were actually some of the best friends I had.

Dave

upside/down

Something I've tried, it's a little bold, is to reply when they say they miss me and will call me soon... I say "no you don't, I know it and you know it, but I appreciate your trying to be polite about it. It's OK, I'm not bothered by it. See ya round."

Every sitch is different. Focus on what you have and will have, not on what's lost.

u/d

GetBusyLiving

I had a dub friend who did this to me for quite a while too. They just want to guilt you into attending meetings, at the very least. I say just try to get over it and move on.

GBL

missy04

Yep, that's it. Sorry, but that's the way the JW mindset works. She feels guilty every time she talks to you, especially if she doesn't try to attract you back to the Kingdom Hall. It's a real shame. As a JW, I blew off some "worldly" people that were actually some of the best friends I had.

Yah I think she knows she can't get me back into the KH.

It's just really frustrating!! LOL

I mean I care about her and I want to know how she's doing, and so I don't call her on it. Although I have thought about writing her an email and telling her I would really appreciate it if she would just tell me what the deal is, if I am too worldly of association for her or what, I would like to hear it come out of her mouth instead of just blowing me off.

Blowing people off is about as irritating as can be and prob even falls under their defenition of "worldly"

freedom96

It is sad how the WTS does very little to promote friendship.

One thing we must remember, is that usually in the case of witnesses, they are so brainwashed with what the WTS teaches, it overrides how they really feel. I have no question about one friend of mine in particular, who I know loves me like his brother, but if I were to officially leave or be df'd, he would be compelled not to talk to me. Not that he doesn't care, but it is what the WTS teaches, and that comes first. If not out of loyalty, surely it is because of fear. I know he would have love for me just the same.

The WTS is very powerful, especially due to the fact that they claim to be the only channel from you to God.

Goldminer

Typical JW mentality.It's to shame back into submission.

It's also a conditional friendship you have there.Go back to the meetings 100% and she'll be your best friend.

what_Truth?

If you want to talk to your friend then you have to do two very important things first.

1) Don't rebel against the basic moral rules of the JW's. (Don't do drugs, sleep around, etc)

2) get a good education and a well paying job.

Make sure to send e-mails updating her on your successes. By doing so you've proven that x-jw's aren't evil self hating wrecks that go nowhere in life. She may not acknowlege that fact but it will definately stick in her mind once she starts having issues with the so-called "truth". That brings us this rule

3) When she finally makes her break from the Jehovah Witnesses take her back as a friend unconditionally and without apology.

mnb77

Sorry to hear that. I've had the same thing sort of happen to me. Jw friend use to email me all the time and we would discuss the differences between the religions we took part in and then she got a new job and the interaction tappered off and I haven't heard from her for several months. Sad that I could draw her away from the Jw and show her her freedoms she could have.

Doubtfully Yours

Missy04,

With firm JWs the attitude is "if you're not with me, then you're against me". Try to ignore your 'friend' for a very long time just to see if you at least get a phone call.

DY

hmmmm

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