Why are we here? ?Here? is not talking about the planet or why we are alive, but why are you reading this? Why have you sought out this place? Only you know those answers, and I definitely don?t know anything about anyone, but here is the answer for me. You?ll notice ?we? in the place of me, as I have learned to not think of ?me?, because I have come to think it is selfish to believe I am the only one feeling as I do at any particular time.
Here ? right now ?here? is on an apostate forum. Am I here because I want to promote hatred of an organization? At first I would have answered yes. The answer now is definitely no. So why then am I here?
There must be a purpose, mustn?t there? For me I hope to learn more. Did we need an organization or even a bible for that matter to tell us to not kill anyone, steal anything, or lie? Definitely some of us do. But what about those who do not, is it possible an otherwise strong, intelligent, and progressive person could get trapped by that which was designed (this gives the most benefit of the doubt to motives) to give comfort to the weak minded, or even harness the power of numbers of weaker people (another possibility that I lean towards) to benefit a few strong ones? Think of how many ?weak minded people? you have seen at the hall, do you think the elders don?t get any kind of benefit from a group of say 100 people following their every direction? I know my uncles did everything from rent houses to finance cars for people from the hall. Imagine if you could do it, $300-$500 for a house every month, and $300 for a car, say you only get five people to do it, that?s an EASY $3,000 per month. Not saying this happens everywhere, but I know it happened where I was. One uncle even owned a gas station, guess where everyone bought gas? Coffee breaks? My dad had a concrete company?where do you think the concrete came from for the hall? How about any halls within reach? Do you think they got it for free or at a premium?
So now lets go back to purpose for us. Are we here to maybe help anyone who will listen break free from the chains we wore ourselves? Some of us I think can say no. The carnage that takes place in the debates is a great spectator sport, and I think Simon should find a way to make money off of it. There are so many who seem to really want to accomplish something here. Like it?s unfinished business. I know for some they want to lash out, get back at the demon that took so much from them, and still takes a little piece out of every day. We will never know what it is like to wake up and not think about our past in a bad way. Some of us will never ever know what is like to walk into a warm home we grew up in, with our parents smiling because we are home. Some of us will never ever spend another night in the place we used to call home as children because it hurts too badly to stay or we aren?t welcome.
For me, I brought my brother into the truth. Even that word has a different meaning to me now. Truth is a bad thing for me. I brought my only full brother into it. He got married at 19 just like me. He believes it like I once did. I will not be done until he is free. But is that what he wants? Do I care? Hell, I don?t know, all I know is he shakes hands every day with people that would have passed he and I on the road like we were safety cones not very many years ago because we happily participated in Christmas with our mother. Because my mother left a piece of crap man who had to be forced to pay his child support while his kids were starving and their mom was pawning her jewelry to pay for her youngest son?s asthma medicine so he didn?t suffocate. But he could spend a few hundred dollars a month to hide his preteen girlfriend, and was a damn good reader for the Watchtower on Sundays.
I can only imagine the terror of those poor souls on here who were molested by someone ?important?. I wish I could walk in to that room with that little boy or girl and tell those bastards to carry their ass to hell for telling a kid maybe they misunderstood something or ?was there anyone else who saw it?). There isn?t hurt enough for someone who listened to a child relate to them of the terror they endured and then ask more leading questions to prove it was their fault. Even worse, how can anyone call himself or herself honorable who tells that child to say no more about it to anyone, like their memories are invalid and forbidden? How can you put the burden of dishonoring GOD on a child and his/her parents for sharing what happened to them?
Anyway, I?m sorry if I?m presumptuous in taking the liberty to post a rant like this and including a group by saying ?we?. I just believe I?m not alone, so if there?s just one other person feeling similar that ?we? included you, my friend.
I?m here to get somebody out. I want to know someone read something I wrote and figured out they are not alone. I want someone to know they are ok and those bastards did this to us and somebody damn well knew what they were doing was wrong, and I?d hit them wherever it hurt the most, just for you, my brother/sister in arms.
You want to know why people hate ?The Truth?? Give me a call, send me a PM and I?ll give you the number to my cell phone. Those people end lives. Those of us who lived through the worst could never ever go to hell if there is one.
We?ve been and gone already.