So Confused (page 2)

JT

#######trouble says

. I'm starting to see some things that I know aren't right in the organization. I'm trying not to see it. My life has been disrupted enough lately, and I don't know if I could take much more disruption.

What scares me the most is this: what if I find out that the Truth, this foundation I've built my last 15 years on, isn't what I thought it was? My whole life would be uprooted. I don't know if I could handle that, or where would I go from there.

######

you have stated your feelings well and that is how almost everyone of us felt to some degree SCARED TO DAMN DEATH --that our entire world would come crashing down

we understand how you feel- but your world will not come crashing down

infact this is a thread you may want to read

coming to learn things about what we have believed so long is very hard

but you can do it and survive and thrive as well

but you need to know how to do it and asking for advice is the key

make sure that what you are told can be backed up and never let anyone tell you that your faith is weak or you are a bad person just becasue you ask them a question they don;t like

smile

you will be just fine- already you have taken a very Powerful step just by being here

i recall the first time i went to an "APOSTATe" siste

i thought demons would come out of my monitor and all i saw were folks who shared many of the same concerns that i did but like me were FORCED to never mention it due to being label a HATER OF GOD HIMSELF

well as you have seen no demons are coming out of your monitor and we are jusr regualar old folks looking for some answers without being beaten for asking questions

always remember this:

I PERFER TO HAVE QUESTIONS I CAN'T ANSWER THAN QUESTIONS I CAN'T ASK

JAMES

EMAIL ME PLEASE

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/forum/thread.asp?id=5574&site=3#66584

alex

Goto www.exmormon.org and go view their message boards. See how many people there go through the same struggles you have now with JWism. But in their case its Mormonism. I'm a recovering Mormon and glad to be free. I too felt that the Almighty would strike me down for posting on an exmormon.org site. Surely the governing board of your sect won't mind you reading up on the dangers of Mormonism. But you'll see a very similar situation like yours with those people there.

circe

Troubled,

Welcome, welcome, welcome! As you have read, we are very glad to have you here. I am very glad to have you here. Your story sounds EXACTLY like what I went through from 1996 to 1999.

I had depression issues before I was baptized as a JW in 1990. Medication helped me stay active as a Witness for quite a few years.

When some physcial problems started making it hard for me to attend the meetings regularly, those that I though I could count on dropped me faster than I could say "Help". In their eyes I'd become "spiritually weak". Many in the congregation (like yours) didn't even notice I hadn't been around much for three years.

Where was the distinguishing mark of true Christians? Where was the love? I so completely empathize and sympathize with you!

Seeker and JT have given you the advice that I would have, but I want to reiterate one point: Don't worry about "bringing reproach upon Jehovah" by talking to a counselor. Believe me, they've heard it all before. Step back for a moment and think about it: Do you really believe that God would begrudge your trying to get help?

I would love to chat with you in private on yahoo, msn instant messenger, or ICQ. Email me at [email protected]

Again, welcome and please stay.

circe

Zero

What scares me the most is this: what if I find out that the Truth, this foundation I've built my last 15 years on, isn't what I thought it was? My whole life would be uprooted. I don't know if I could handle that, or where would I go from there.
Sometimes, I wish I had never become depressed. Life was simpler then, black and white. I never really got upset, and nothing ever bothered me. At least, it didn't seem to. But maybe I wasn't living in reality.

"I am giving you a new commandment, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love among yourselves."
--John 13:34,35 NWT

If you would like to share discussion with others in similar situation as yourself, post me privately at:
[email protected]

You are not alone.

Zero

rem

Great advice, Alex.

I looked at exmormon sites as well when I was researching the WT organization to get some perspective. I realized that the arguments and the issues were really similar. It really helped me tune my BS detector and demystified the GB so I didn't feel so guilty about questioning their interpretations and policies.

rem

"Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so."
..........Bertrand Russell

Maximus

Isn't ironic that real, practical and truthful help is being extended here on this forum and not through a prattling organization?

Troubled, I am a former CO/DO with many decades of "service," and I can assure you that you are just like literally thousands of persons whom I've met. The Society will tut-tut and blame local elders, but we know where the blame lies. It's not with you.

Amazing, isn't it? Troubled gets real love here.

"By your fruits you will be known."

Maximus

gsark

you said:

I don't really want to talk to my counselor about these spiritual issues because I don't want to bring dishonor to God's organization or be disloyal to Jehovah. And I feel guilty posting here too. I've never done anything like this before.

Jehovah is big enough to take care of Himself

The 'organization is big enough to take care of itself.

Feel free to talk to your counselor, who is your health care partner, about anything you wish.

Life is a roller coaster. Get in, sit down, shut up and hang on!

Billygoat

troubled,

I am so grateful you've found an outlet to release your concerns and fears! You have found a SAFE place to think and voice your expressions! WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME!

I too have struggled with depression and suicide. You will meet many people on this board that have been through what you're going through. I know you will find them a source of strength, comfort, and healing.

There are so many pieces of advice we could give you, but it would probably overwhelm your senses! They are all probably very good suggestions. I can suggest to listen to people's experiences and how they handled it. Keep an open mind and heart and decide what is best for you. Jehovah wants you to be happy! He is our Father right? What good father would want terrible things for their children? Here are some of my favorite scriptures that pulled me through those dark times:

Jeremiah 33:3 - Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things which you have not known.

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

I know this isn't worded the same in the New World Translation, but look it up and see what it says. They are words of comfort and solace from a Loving Father!

You will learn a lot if you continue to post and read other's experiences on this board. Just remember that God will protect you if you ask - not if you're feeling strong! You will learn that not everything on this earth is what it seems.

You are in my prayers! Please keep us updated!

Billygoat

alamb

Welcome to the board!!!
I have had experiences with depression and Post Traumatic Stress Syndrom also stemming from Witness background and rearing. Funny, the elders told me there was no such thing as PTSD and now there is an Awake featuring this on the cover. I did see a psychologist who informed me that the MAJORITY of her clientelle were Witnesses or ex-Witnesses. That made sense and was also a comfort in a strange way.
Please feel free to e-mail me also. I am here if you need.

Moxy

being in a similar situation, i would also recommend that you try opening up to your husband and, if you can be comfortable with it, your therapist as well. you will find much support from people here but it is no substitute for what you can get from the people you truly know you.

mox

So Confused

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