by YellowLab 40 Replies latest jw friends
Thanks,
If someone after 20 years wants to come back, change their life, and do what is "right", why disapline them. they say something like getting back one lost sheep is better than gaining one new one. Well, how the hell do they expect me to want to come back now?
Is there any way you can publish the name of the snitch in the local paper and thank her for messing up your life? A personal ad maybe?
Jeannie
I was going to appeal it, but after long and very hard consideration I decided for what! I dont want back in! Jehovah god knows what is in my heart, and he will judge me in the end. Not the elders or any one else!
It is just better sometimes to avoid these people, then try to have to answer their questions, etc.
In order for this to have happened, someone had to tell the Elder's what she was doing, and gave somekind of testimony. Based on this, they are to have two Brothers look into the matter and report back to the Body. If the report indicates that wrongdoing took place, a Judicial Committee is formed, and it goes from there.
Exactly. Unless someone is still known as a JW or an active JW complains to the elders, it's usually a "live and let live" attitude when someone is gone that long.
But, on the other hand, when a body of elders has plenty of free time or you get a zealous, young elder trying to make a name for himself, watchout!
I had one elder on the committee that was the same one on my first when I was 18. And the other was my teacher in high school, and the other I knew from when I went at age 18. I should have not answered the door. Thats the whole key. Or at least not shown interest, cause thats where they get ya! Shouldnt it be the other way around? Dis ya if you dont want anything to do with the truth, but welcome you back with open arms when you reach out to them for help? Especially when you want to come back. Thats when you need the most encouragement! After that long, you need bible study, you need fellowship! Thats what keeps you going! You would think they would know that.
Cindy
Dear Sweet Cindy,
If you ever need an ear to listen, I am here for you. You can e-mail me anytime at [email protected]
I wish you peace and strength. Please know that life has a way of executing it's own justice. What goes around comes around.
I started running to sort out my own issues growing up JW. I run several marathons each year. That is 26.2 miles non-stop. Lots of issues...
Please know you are not alone. You are a good person. You do not need a cult to make you feel valued and important. It is all manipulation.
With all Sincere Love and Concern,
Jill
you have a pm cindy...
Or could there be a little more to this story that we do not know??
There usually is.
A guy in a nearby city was DF'd about 10 years after he attended his last meeting. He had family still "in," including grown kids and an ex-wife; some of the kids were still going to meetings, as was the wife.
Out of the blue the elders called him on the phone at his place of business and informed him they wished to meet with him to discuss "serious charges" about his conduct. He was floored, and declined to meet with them. A former elder, he thought he knew the rules. He reminded them he'd been missing in action for a decade and made no pretense of being a JW.
They argued that his "family" knew him to be a JW, as did other dubs in the city and some were being "stumbled." Therefore his behavior (he had a long-time live-in woman friend) "required" them to hold a meeting. They met without him and he got a call informing him of their decision (DF, of course). It was read at a KH the following week.
His grown kids were really troubled by this and felt their elders had been "out to get" their dad, with whom they had forged a peaceful and productive adult relationship. Their mother announced shortly afterward that she and her JW love interest were going to tie the knot.
The "more to the story" part? It turned out the ex-wife, feeling it was vital to get an outright admission from the guy that he'd "broken the marriage vows," got on the phone with another sister on the extension and told him she was in love and assumed she was free to remarry because he was living with someone but, while she was certain they were lovers, she wanted him to just say it so her conscience would be clean when she remarried. The guy obliged her by saying, sure, we're sleeping together.
Then the two sisters went to the elders and insisted they take action because he was "known" by many as a JW, and had confessed infidelity. This meant he could be DF'd, and also that she was free to remarry. Of course, the rank and file is mostly mystified as to what brought this guy down; they don't have access to the rest of the story and most of them wouldn't believe this kind of crap goes on. But it does.
Edited to add: Cindy, you probably don't fully realize it yet, but you are incredibly lucky to have seen the true nature of this WT beast from the get-go. It saved you years of heartache, frustration and disappointment.
So disfellowshipping the Ex and having him permantently cut off from his family so the ex-wife can marry the new boyfrined. Wow! The depth of Christian love. Incredible!
