This happened almost three years ago, but since I always enjoy reading about other people's JW encounters, I thought I'd finally share one of my own.
I lived in an apartment for four years following my disfellowshipping and no one had ever come to my door, not even so much as a shepherding visit. (Yeah, right.) I had lurked on this board for a while, but was put off by the anger and negativity of some people and so I didn't stay long. Looking back, I think that, even though I had read "Crisis of Conscience" and was going through a devastating time, I just wasn't ready to know the truth about the "truth". At that time, there was a slight possibility that the JWs still could have gotten me back if they'd even tried to answer my questions.
About a month after I moved into a house in a completely different part of town, two women came to my door. If you've never been on the other side as a householder, let me tell you, it's a weird, scary feeling. I thought I'd feel empowered because I knew something they didn't, but I was actually terrified and extremely nervous. I kept holding onto the doorframe, so they wouldn't see my hands shaking.
I can't remember what the opening question was, because I ignored it. I asked her, "Are you Jehovah's Witnesses?" She said, "Yes, but don't let that put you off."
Me: "Well, it's just that you might be wasting your time with me. I studied rather extensively with your religion, but there were several questions that no one could answer and so I stopped." (Oopsie, my first lie, unless you consider studying extensively the family studies my dad used to have with me.)
She made some small talk about where and with whom I studied. I made up some names and places and then she asked me what my questions were.
Me: "I was a history major in college (another lie - they just kept popping out. I didn't even go to college.) and so from my research, I learned that Jerusalem was not destroyed in 607 as JWs claim. In fact, try as I might, I can't find any historical reference that agrees with your date of 607. All I want to know is the book they found that date in." (This was actually true. I still believed that somewhere in Brooklyn, there had to be a reference with the 607 date.)
She looked down, began flipping through pages of her Bible and then muttered under her breath, "Yeah, I used to have a problem with dates, too." Brightens a bit when she finds her scripture and reads the one about if you have enough faith, you can move mountains. Smiling robot face, "I truly believe this scripture literally. That if you have enough faith, you can actually move a mountain. Why, just this week on the news, some scientists transported matter with a new machine they built!"
Me: skeptical noise. "Really? Where'd you see that?"
JW: "I told you - it was on the news. They moved a piece of paper from one part of the room to the other! So you see, it all comes down to faith." She went on for about three more minutes. (Do you have any idea how hard it is to talk for three minutes straight without stopping?) But she did it, bless her heart. I was trying so hard to listen and remember everything she was telling me about faith that I seem to have forgotten most of it. She ended our little one-sided conversation by trying to give me some literature and asking if she could come back with some information on 607. I said no to the literature but yes to the RV.
That was June. In September, I was leaving my house one Saturday morning and I saw two nicely dressed teenage boys with bookbags turtling down the sidewalk. (It had rained the night before and the snails were out. I was tempted to put one next to them and see who won the race. Hey, even snails need a blue ribbon now and then.) I called out to them as I walked to my car. One of them heard me and looked over and then looked away really fast with a "Please, Jehovah, don't let her be talking to me" look on his face. I called out again and the other, slightly braver one heard me and walked over. I asked him if he knew S----. He pointed to his friend and said, "Yeah, that's his mom."
I said, "Will you please let her know that I'm still waiting for her to come back?" The poor kids looked so relieved that they didn't have to talk to me about anything real. They were so happy - "Oh yeah, sure, we'll tell her!"
One Saturday morning at the end of October: a knock on my door. Guess who?
JW: "Hi, remember me? Well, I was just driving by with my friend and I was telling her about you and she said, 'Who cares about dates?' and I said, 'Yeah, I know.' But we decided that we'd come by and answer your question. So how about tomorrow morning at 10:30?"
Me: "I'll be here."
I will never forget that night. I couldn't sleep, laid awake in bed for hours and cried till I prayed. I begged God to open my eyes and help me to see and that if there was anything at all about the Jehovah's Witness religion that was true or that he wanted me to incorporate into my life, I would do it. I wanted (and still want) everyone's suffering to stop. I couldn't (and still can't) read the newspaper without crying. I told Him whatever they said the next day, I would listen to with an open heart and mind.
Sunday morning, 10:30 a.m. . . . noon. . . 5:00 p.m. They never showed. And I don't just mean they didn't come that day. I mean they never came back . . . ever.
And that's how I really knew what I already knew, if you know what I mean. The JWs come to my door about twice a year and I make up a fresh story (lie) each time. Perhaps I'll share some of those another day, but right now I must away to work.
Enjoy your sandwich.
