My JW mom refuses to attend my wedding!?!?!?

by d_yell 41 Replies latest jw friends

  • Listener

    Raj says

    hiii brother n sister, i m an hindu,,,n my galfrnd is jehovahs witness so cn she attend weding of my brother,,,i knw rules of witness so just by attending weding is some thng wrong,,do reply,,

    Hi Raj, it's really up to your girlfiend to decide if she wants to attend the wedding, it is a conscience matter but hearing about your relationship with her there probably won't be a problem. Why don't you just ask her?

  • raj

    hii brother listener,thx for ur suggestion,actually d problm is her mom might nt allow her,so just want to knw dat in jehovahs witness org is attending wedding of hindu is wrong? n i knw d resriction of few thng dat thy must follow ,bt just by attending is it wrong infront of jehovahs eye,,pz do reply.

  • Snoozy

    Their mentality " to see how close he can come to apostate acts without oversteppig the line". Hilarious!
    My JW hubby and his JW family came to each of our daughter's church (One catholic)weddings and my hubby even gave his daughters away..he did however decide that he couldn't/shouldn't attend the religious wedding at my daughter's second wedding. Neither him nor his family came. Go figure..all of a sudden it is a crime?Oh yeah, new light..created to fit their wishes on the subject.

    A true Christian could not conscientiously join or participate in any prayers or religious exercises that he knew to be contrary to Bible teaching. Nor is he interested to see how close he can come to apostate acts without overstepping the line
  • jgnat

    d-yell, you are caught in a clash of cultures and you should not be surprised. Enraged and disappointed, yes. But not surprised. The American culture is all about the bride and her ideal wedding day. If you stake all your happiness on everything going perfectly on this day, you are bound for disappointment. Your mom is who she is and she may very well decide not to come. Her loss.

    My (JW) hubby similarly freaks out at the mention of attending in a church building, and he tries to weasel out at every opportunity. This, and he has a huge (non-JW) family with lots of weddings and funerals through the years. I've helped him negotiate his mental minefield by reminding him that it is a conscience matter. He can attend a service and "not participate" by not kneeling when directed, not singing the songs, etc. etc. I also put on my "righteous Christian" hat and remind him that to attend the reception and not the vows is selfish. Attending the vows and witnessing the commitment the two of you are making is the essence of the whole ceremony! We've attended lots of weddings and funerals through the years.

    Do encourage her to meet with the "brothers" for their advice. They will very likely remind her that it is a "conscience matter". Ask your mom to let you know of the outcome, and be as sympathetic as you can muster. Weave the word "conscience" in to the conversataion as much as you can.

    You might compromise and suggest she participate in some special way at the reception.

    Raj, attendance at your brother's wedding is the least of your problems. She isn't supposed to be seeing you at all! The Jehovah's Witnesses teach that all other religions are under the influence of the devil.

  • willyloman

    FYI: This post, and d-yells' dilemma, is six years old. Wonder what she decided, and how the wedding went.

  • jgnat






  • White Dove
    White Dove


    But yes, I'd like to know what happened, too.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    So, Raj is the one that dug this up.

    Jgnat's advice to Raj is right on.

    Your girlfriend is in trouble with her elders if they know about you.

    There are no girlfriends or boyfriends in the JW world.

    There are only friends, fiances, and spouses.

  • Scully


    people can do whatever they want... if they are prepared for the consequences (even if the consequences are stupid, petty, mean and irrational). If you are an observer of a Hindu wedding ceremony and do not participate in what JW would consider to be "acts of worship" there should be no issue.

    Best course of action is to do what you want to do, and don't broadcast to anyone who doesn't need to know (like JWs). It's nobody else's business.

  • raj

    hii thx a lot 4 ur suggestion,borther n sister,i do accept wat ever u all side, i also knw d rules of jws world,

    d thng is i m an hindu,,bt i m learing bible n attending meetings regularly,i joined witness 1yrs ago,,hv made lot of progess,n i hv nt yet said my parents abt dis,,,

    i lov 1 gal who is jehovahs witness,bt previously i was nt knwing abt all dis i fel lov wit her,,she said me abt d religion problm n evrythng,so i decided to learn bible frm heart it tok 3yr n i finaly made d choice of learing,so my partner has nt done any wrong thng,she clearly suggested me abt jehovahs world,so dats d point.\

    my brother is getting married so i wanted her to cm n attend,so just want to knw,,,whter attening is wrong,,,she wont participate in any function n tradition,,n i hv also started walking as per bible principal,,slowly n made lot of change ,just plz suggest me,,

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