Why ? Why? WHY???

by rune 160 Replies latest jw friends

  • formerout
    formerout

    ringo5,

    Rune wants answers to appease a vacancy in his psyche created by no longer wanting to belong to a high-control religion.Who wouldn't want answers??, but I wouldn't call it a vacancy in his psyche because he questions the basis for many peoples unprovable ideas...

    I understand what you are saying and we have given him credit for asking intelligent questions, however I don't think it would be wise to suggest that his interest is NOT the most important here. He is human after all. He doesn't have to ask these profound questions to have differing opinions thrown at him. He has asked them and we have complied. To condemn either party at this point would refute the entire process.

    The vast majority of posters on this topic have offered up thoughts that may be considered evasive to someone who's psyche has just taken the big jump from "high-control" to completely free.While I don't think it was the vast majority, I think those that answered with your too young to have a valid opinion, or you haven't smelled a certain continent, may have been slightly evasive and avoided giving any valid proof.

    Age (young) and experience (Africa) are 100% valid as far as having a BETTER understanding of the world around us. (Just ask me how much I thought I knew 10 years ago, before having children, and I will be the first to say I thought I almost knew it all. My perception has changed since then.) Everybody has given him full respect for his introspective mind. It is not fair for comments such as his age or experiences to be taken out of context and be used to suggest that their opinions are therefore invalid.

    Regarding evasiveness, some try to avoid using absolutes, due to experience in life. Their being considered evasive cannot be judged properly by a person who leaves virtually no option for a second opinion.

    He has since presented very intelligent questions that many of us have already considered.I'm just starting to consider these questions myself and am enjoying the free exchange of ideas that you can find here.

    You will find people like Big Tex, LT, Narkissos et al to be very valuable teachers. May your questions always be asked and may you never find the ABSOLUTE answer to any of them.

    Rune's subconscious does not want absolutes but his conscious mind has been imbedded with the opposite so that his reaction has seemed to be rejecting our fairly wise thoughts.I'm sorry, which ones? :)

    Very witty, but I don't think you would have posted the other comments if you truly felt that there were no "wise thoughts" here.

    Welcome to the journey, my friend. You will enjoy the ride. You have at least agreed to get on that ride. Lots never allow themselves such freedom.

    Brad

  • ringo5
    ringo5

    BTTT



    everybody loves a good mystery and loves even better to be the first one to put together the clues and figure it out.

    And then open the packet in the center of the board to find out they were wrong because someone screwed up and didn't show them one of their cards like they were supposed to!!

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Rune:
    You acknowledge that people think different ways, but then appear to denigrate those that have minds that work a different way from yours. There truly is more to life than facts and that which you take in with your eyes, ears and nose. My own experience has led me to believe that if that were all that life were about I would be experientially impoverished. You may feel differently, and that's your right.

    "Life" has a habit of softening that kind of a stance, though not for all...

    Perhaps if I take your last post as an example of what I mean about your "style" affecting the way people view what you say:

    You knew? Then perhaps you should not be so full of conviction. I 'know' facts and figures, knowing full well that they are not 100% absolute. You are just stressing the word to the point where knowing means you have no consideration for the validity of the information being off. That's silly. No one should be that self-assured IMO... but ahh yes, what you were saying is that losing this conviction and realizing what you actually know for certain is completely minimal (if even that) is what you were getting at. Good show then, I agree
    Now I have to confess that I completely agree with your viewpoint, if I'm reading you correctly. However the method you've employed to express yourself comes across as dismissive (though it could just be the way I'm reading it).
    Just my 2p - I hope it helps. I'm enjoying your exchange with Narkissos, btw.
    I would like to address this point, however:
    God represents certain things to people, a certain definition, a set of qualities and characteristics, is what I think you are saying. In which sense, as one is not declaring God 'real', God is a construction of the human mind. Try getting a believer to admit to this one... there is so much mythology to get past.
    You appear to be assuming that "God" is merely a theological contruct to everyone, based solely on mythology, fantasy, and dusty writings. That would fly in the face of some of the expressions that you've already received about folks personal "connections".

    Frenchy:
    Whether you think it "mob mentality" or not, you surely know me better than to jump onto bandwagons. I've expressed my opinions of what the "young man" has had to say, independant of the opinions of others.

    You also know that I would just as soon lay into Farkel, AlanF, Terry, Corvin, etc., if I felt that they were carrying on oblivious to the consequences of their actions and words.

    Formerout:You make some good points.
    The objectivity of subjectivity, and vica-verse

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    ...

    Ross (LT)

    You know somehow that's why I didn't put any name on this post, it was a general statement from an obvious example to talk about the matter when it comes about TALKING REAL. (you're not the only one concerned of course) Why do we need to get into personnal consideration and superficial support that doesn't help to go further on a subject ... (cause it's about a subject not anyone in particular) This one can be painfull and we know why (it is related to this topic)

    I'm not gonna get too much into personnal consideration but I think that you know I don't hate you at all, at all, at all !!! (an other way to put it ... for a change). Sorry if even then, I don't think that I should support you and only you for that reason ... Just give me an/the argument ... Also you were not the one in need, and to me somehow you've been unfair on your statements about Rune ... and more over so early)

    If it's about Ian/Dansk (I understand your feeling) ... but this is why I didn't feel like getting personnal and bashing on Rune, had a valid reason here :

    • Rune probably didn't know at first for Ian. That was something to considere on our side (cause WE KNOW that He PROBABLY didn't KNOW ... Is he responsible in anything here ? ... could we have been a little be clearer on the matter) ... Does that change the subject itseflf ?
    • Also Ian/Dansk have everybodies support here (YOU KNOW it WE KNOW it and IAN KNOWS it) so what was the need here ??? That was just too much and certainly not an argument nor a reason (because of the circumstances and Rune's specific questionning/topic).

    Also (to me of course / from what I've read) when he said deluded (it's about the too much unbelievable side that people might get into ... not the subtle effect of vibes or energy ... which finaly can join Ian/Dansk statements and even most of others - that's what it seems most of you didn't realised in what he said more than once and keep on turning around the subject (because of the how the smart kid is talking - stuff it ! you should be all bigger than that ... stay realitic at least) - thinking they are talking wise and listening/reading/ know so good what others have said or have to say or want to come out with ... Well ??? there opinion ...) ... he just stayed true to what he knows by now, some things do works but we know why = for instance LOVE IS MAGIC.

    But the main thing here is that we do talking about a very important matter that as Rune said doesn't allow us to free our mind for good to be really open and deal with the reality and to some extand why not the mistic side of reallity ... like LOVE again ... (but again we know how love works on people at least - we can mesure somehow the effect of it stimulus = that's tangible).

  • Narkissos
    Narkissos

    Rune

    How am I doing so far?

    Quite fine IMO.

    My point is that if both "believers" and "unbelievers" were just a little more conscious of the symbolical dimension of their respective opinions and worldviews they would realise they are not so far apart. That's really all I meant to say.

  • rune
    rune

    kitties_and_horses_oh_my!: The criticisms were merely an attempt to evoke another reply that would perhaps some kind of response to challenge mine. I definitely don't consider myself immune to being deluded, at least, not over some issues in my life. Nor was I lashing out; this thread is an intellectual pursuit. After all, the words that I say to anyone are not going to make anyone drop their faith, correct? That is, unless, I was so convincing that they saw the reasoning I used as sound and adopted it as their own - but I am not vain enough to ever expect this or even desire it, and still, that would be their choice and their own thoughts, regardless of the original source of the information. Changing the lives of other people that I am not more than vaguely acquainted with would accomplish no purpose for me. But I will take this as you wrote it - not directed solely at me - and you make very good points about how people will crash through life. One thing I should point out, though, that I feel is important; nothing you can simply say to someone , such as in a discussion like this, will ever control them. Stating opinions and refuting others' opinions with hopes of a debate exerts no control on anyone. It's their choice to participate, and it's their choice to just consider it, take it to heart, or ignore it completely. Nothing I or anyone can say will change that... Thanks for the warm regard, too.

    formerout: I'm...not quite sure what to say. I think you should stop trying to psychoanalyze me. I really don't understand why you are going on like this. I'm glad you have grown from this discussion, but perhaps if you could limit your posts to trying to contribute to it rather than examining the interpersonal dynamics of it we could all have a more productive read.

    ringo5: The nature of this discussion (or at least one of the questions) is to examine why people are involved with mysticism at all instead of nothing particular. No answers are final - including the crutches idea. Several points have been put forth as to why people use mysticism, regardless of whether their belief is in something real or fictional...good points, but perhaps there are more yet to be shown.

    ringo5 (again): I don't think he understands that I have been out for seven years, that I barely know anyone and I am just trying to have a debate on the questions I asked. He'll come around, I hope.

    formerout: As much as I don't want to stir up more analyses of my wonderful or horrible mind, may I point out that giving me respect is completely irrelevant. I don't care if you respect me, I just want an objective thread. Going on like this isn't achieving that... You make so many unfounded statements about me. Don't bother, whether you think they are true or not. No matter what I say, if the content doesn't make sense, argue the content back with something to see if what I said stands up when I reply. Making needless judgements about my personality accomplishes nothing useful, nor does stating distinctions between people. This means mentioning age, or saying someone is a 'teacher'. If they are so wise, let them argue my or anyone else's points and exemplify it rather than talking about their flaunted qualities. As for "evasiveness":

    Rune's subconscious does not want absolutes but his conscious mind has been imbedded with the opposite so that his reaction has seemed to be rejecting our fairly wise thoughts.I'm sorry, which ones? :)
    Very witty, but I don't think you would have posted the other comments if you truly felt that there were no "wise thoughts" here.

    He was asking you to give specific examples of which of your thoughts you stated were 'wise' and why you think so.

    ringo5: That's very vague, and also, are many of the religions people join really a mystery with 'clues' to be put together? I argue they are a prepackaged set of beliefs for someone to simply adopt as their own. The main 'thought' put into these beliefs is convincing yourself more and more that the things you have been told are true, without proof. This, I feel, is the vessel of faith. As for completely original sets of beliefs constructed by someone (or a group together at once)...are these clues solid and logical, or are they more likely subjective? Talking about it this way is probably too general.

    LittleToe: Like formerout, you seem hung up on the social aspects of this conversation rather the information. Why?

    There truly is more to life than facts and that which you take in with your eyes, ears and nose. My own experience has led me to believe that if that were all that life were about I would be experientially impoverished.

    More to life such as what? There is the information gathered by your senses, and then there are your own thoughts. You declare the assumption that you aren't "experentially impoverished" - lacking in 'sufficient' experience, whatever that means - and go on while failing to even detail what you're talking about.

    Perhaps if I take your last post as an example of what I mean about your "style" affecting the way people view what you say:

    Pardon me if I fail to care any further about topics like this. It's nitpicking.

    You appear to be assuming that "God" is merely a theological contruct to everyone, based solely on mythology, fantasy, and dusty writings. That would fly in the face of some of the expressions that you've already received about folks personal "connections".
    No, I am not assuming that. I was trying to follow Narkissos' idea of the 'symbolical' level using "God" as an example since he did too. And furthermore, I think if you argue this then you should refer back to Narkissos' post, regarding the level between "real" and "imagination" as he so clearly said. In other words, no, in this sense "God" is not being considered just a bunch of mythology. "God" would stand for something 'more' without being given form on this symbolical level. With further speculation we could consider just what this 'more' is. These are just hypothetical suggestions:
    God represents certain things to people, a certain definition, a set of qualities and characteristics, is what I think you are saying. In which sense, as one is not declaring God 'real', God is a construction of the human mind. Try getting a believer to admit to this one... there is so much mythology to get past.
    frenchbabyface: You hit the nail on the head...nice post. Narkissos: Simple and well put... There is really nothing I can think to argue on the basis of this idea. This doesn't explain why people jump into the mystical, but it helps to understand that is isn't such a far leap from not doing it. All the same, I am still curious. The symbolic level is how we think, we all need that regardless of our outlook. All of this ties back to a theory I had run over a few times - that, regardless of the mythology, the extraneous ideas surrounding "God", that the real 'substance' of "God" is found in the collective minds of humanity (those who consider there to be only a singular "God", i.e. those who are Christian for the most part). It seems somewhat ironic when, if you read the part of the bible that says man was made in "God"'s image, when it as actually "God" who was made in ours - the omnipotence rooting from what is a seemingly limitless symbolic realm to some. In the mythology, "God" actually behaves like a tyrant, yet people still profess "God" to be pure goodness and love. This of course, only blankets some of the human race, and probably not even the majority - for the "God" idea I mean - but it does show some interesting groundwork to analyzing other faiths too...
  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Frenchie:

    If it's about Ian/Dansk (I understand your feeling) ... but this is why I didn't feel like getting personnal...

    But I did decide to get into it, which was my personal choice.
    I will say that I don't feel that I bashed him, though, as I just don't do that to people. I do agree that with several voices saying the same thing it could look like that, but at least the message he was getting seemed reasonably consistent. I don't think I've been unfair to him, but I'm more than willing to have it pointed out to me, if you truly think that's the case.

    I know you don't hate me, and didn't take your post that way for even a moment. Nor do I expect folks to always support what I say

    Rune:It seems we've got off to a bad start.
    D'ya wanna start over?

    Btw, thanks for the clarification on your position regarding Narkissos' comments. That was helpful.

    More to life such as what? ... and go on while failing to even detail what you're talking about.

    You're question is a valid one. Before I reply, let me just point something out that may help you understand why I don't always come right out with answers in a direct way.
    There are at least three reasons, and a combination thereof:

    1. FormerOut rightly pointed out that some of us avoid using "absolutes" - remember we've all been part of the JW's too, and have tasted that particular bad apple.
    2. Sometimes there's more growth to be had by being given the next step, rather than having it all laid out. Besides, if the individual you are conversing with knows where you're going with the subject you just end up typing lots of stuff for no reason.
    3. The very nature of being a "believer" on an exJW discussion forum is fraught with all sorts of peril, the greatest one being the accusation of proselytization. For that reason I rarely "go there", and was quite happy to overlook this thread as I've contributed to more than my fair share in the past and get tired of coming out with all the same reasonings to a fresh batch of posters.

    So, getting back to your question, what am I talking about?
    I'm talking about having a personal brush with the "Divine", which can involve the senses I mentioned but goes far deeper. You can't prove that I have or have not. There are others that claim such an experience and by comparing notes we can come to the conclusion that we "have", but there's no real way of proving this to someone who has not.

    This is one reason that even ancient spiritual literature has such a fascination to the "believer", because in it they see a reflection of some of what they too have experienced. It enlarges their understanding. It's a form of gnosis wherein you're trying to get me to describe the indescribable, for which we might arrive at some common symbols and nod our heads at each other, but to answer your question to your satisfaction would likely prove impossible. It's as frustrating for the believer and unbeliever alike.

    I hope that helps a little, though I confess that I personally feel that it's woefully inadequte. If you want to delve deeper with further questions then by all means fire away.

  • formerout
    formerout

    Rune, you said, regarding my posts:

    You make so many unfounded statements about me. Don't bother, whether you think they are true or not. No matter what I say, if the content doesn't make sense, argue the content back with something to see if what I said stands up when I reply. Making needless judgements about my personality accomplishes nothing useful, nor does stating distinctions between people. This means mentioning age, or saying someone is a 'teacher'. If they are so wise, let them argue my or anyone else's points and exemplify it rather than talking about their flaunted qualities.

    I think you are still missing my bigger point. When you start a topic like this you leave the door open for many different viewpoints. It is not up to you to tell everybody that they have to say things EXACTLY as you wish them to be said. Open the door completely or don't open it at all. Don't try to minimize other people's contribution to this debate because they have made a couple of comments about age or "smelling Africa". Age and experience does play a part in people's opinion. If you do not think that 10 years from now you will have a different perception than you do now, you are pretty much contradicting your own thesis right of the bat.

    It is interesting that you do these things and then fail to realize that by saying things like this: "If they are so wise, let them argue my or anyone else's points and exemplify it rather than talking about their flaunted qualities.", that you are actually doing the very "flaunting" that you are condemning them of doing. It is odd that you don't realize it.

    As far as your deeper personality, and I am sure you must admit that you have one; I have had a lot of experience dealing with people who, like you, condemn others while they are in fact more guilty of doing what they are condemning the others of doing. And yes it has been recognized by others enough to in fact be called a "personality disorder".

    Having said that, it also applies to your original Question of "Why, Why, WHY??". God does not exist exclusively outside of you. He exists as a part of your being as well. So do emotion and many other personality traits exist within you. As much as you try to suggest that you are the only one here who is capable of separating emotion from this debate, from what I have seen I think the opposite is true. You have not acknowledged a single point that I have made regarding emotion being a very part of our spirit and therefore impossible to be left out of debate. Yet you do make denigrating comments about people 'flaunting their own qualities'. Denial does not eliminate the actual evidence; quite often it only reinforces the fact that the person has some character flaws, which IMHO should be addressed as a part of this exercise of yours.

    Regarding your opinion of my statements being unfounded: They are statements, to be sure, but they have been made after reading all of your posts. I would not want them to be considered as ABSOLUTE. But the more you go on in this topic, the more they are becomining founded. Interesting how that works, isn't it?

    Brad

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    Formerout : No comment ... or just this : maybe you should read yourself (back) or not (your choice after all) ...

  • kitties_and_horses_oh_my!
    kitties_and_horses_oh_my!
    formerout said:
    As far as your deeper personality, and I am sure you must admit that you have one; I have had a lot of experience dealing with people who, like you, condemn others while they are in fact more guilty of doing what they are condemning the others of doing. And yes it has been recognized by others enough to in fact be called a "personality disorder

    Dear formerout,

    I don't know you, we've never really talked, although I have seen a few of your posts. I'm not here to defend or criticize anyone so please don't take this as a personal attack. For me, if someone I had never even talked to in person were to accuse me of having a personality disorder...wow. I find that remarkably unkind.

    A personality disorder is a serious issue. Unless you are a psychiatrist who has examined someone intensively, I don't believe you're qualified to make that diagnosis. I say that with all due respect as someone who works in the mental health field and has dealt with many, many mentally-ill individuals. Further, if you truly believe someone has a personality disorder, then respect and care for that person would say that instead of attacking them publically you kindly mention your concern and possible paths to take towards help. I don't believe you truly think Rune has a personality disorder - if you did, I'm sure you wouldn't be so cruel as to publicly attack someone who was suffering. If you are using that merely as a cruel comment, then you are disrespecting all people who do struggle with life-threatening mental illness.

    Sincerely,

    Kitties

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