Many of you know that since I am d/a, I have'nt spoken to my JW Dad in about 3 years. Well, he is trying to make contact with me, he and my sister had lunch the other day. He said he has been trying to get in touch with us for about 6 months. I don't know why he is trying now,,,maybe he is just missing us. My sister said he asked her if some of the JW's did something to hurt me or my family, if that is the reason we left. She told him , that I really didnt tell her why and that someday I would tell her more, but we really don't talk about it much. That was true at first when I left because I was still working out the kinks on why myself , but now she knows that I no longer believe it to be "truth".
I am wondering if I should call him, he called our house and talked to my son, who will be 18 in a couple of months and my son talked to him just briefly.
I have healed so much from the past, things dealing with the JW's, dealing with my Mom's suicide and things dealing with him.
In my heart and mind , I just wrote off my relationship with my Dad, as if he was dead, and I was dead to him.
Now he wants to talk to me,,,,,,,I am scared really. I don't want to hash up the past, I dont want to get into telling him all the reasons I don't believe it is the truth because he will defend it to the death, and he will try to convert me back. He will use guilt I am sure as he always has. He will probably use the old tactics he always has making me feel bad, I can just hear his voice cracking as he will probably be emotional over it .
I am so afraid it will reawaken feelings I have put to rest. I wonder if I can just call him, check on him, and he me, without getting into all of that.
If I allow him back in my life, will I only hurt myself , and all this time of healing will I go back to hurting again?
He told my sister............" I know what the printed word ( the WT) says about d/f, d/a family and socializing, but ya'll are my family and I want to be able to call ya'll to check on you, and ya'll call me and check on me".
That is the way my Dad always delt with d/f family and certain d/f JW's, feeling he was a little above the average JW, and could set his own rules on dealing with d/f ones.
Have any of you kept in contact with JW family, or let them back in your life, after being totally shunned? Did you just not "go there" with the JW issues?
Just looking for some feedback on this, before I decide what to do..........thanks , hugs to you all, Dede.