It is a sad thing to read your exp. and as someone who was a servant for years I spewed forth just what your mother wrote but thankfully I got out of that yo-yo group and have never been happier. Her letter is really a generic Jw response and the double standard is typical. This religion has much to answer for in regard to tearing people and the family apart and I really feel for you having to exp. it first hand.Sadly there is not much you will be able to do to change her mind at present.JWs have a shut down mode when it comes to this type of thing and only respond by whatever the last Watchtower said on the subject and when you deal with a closed mind all reasoning is stopped..Concentrate on yourself and your own happiness and you will be the better for it believe me.Know that you are a can-do person and do not let this cultic group cast a rope around your feet to trip you so take a big pair of scissors, cut it, and march on with a big grin on your face and don't feel bad about it!!
What kind of JW response do you think I'll get?
there is no reason, ever , for a mother to shut the door on her child. none. my son could come to me and tell me he was an axe-weilding maniac and that he cleaned out my bank account, but i still wouldn't shun him. i would help him. of course he's not and he wouldn't do that to me, but the fact is no one on this planet has a right to tell you to throw away your own child. there are no extenuating circumstances that can justify it, as far as i'm concerned.
i confess i am a hater...of the WTS and the power they wield over people and the most sacred of all bonds, that of a mother and child. it's disgusting .
We cannot convince them to come out from the darkness they are in. I've had problems with my mother since I disassociated myself nearly 5 years ago. I send periodic photos and notes to let her know we (my children) are still alive and living a great life. I keep the lines of communication open but don't expect anything from her. I will recieve something from her every once in a while (well, my kids will but....) and she will be using her usual methods (guilt tripping and blaming) to try to convince to come back. I simply ignore it and keep living my life. I'm tired of always trying to make sure my life is up to some one else's standards. Eventually she will get it and back off. You can't let it keep you down. My mother just sent me an entire photo album filled with photos and updates on all of my old JW friends, her way of trying to guilt me into coming back because she knows we were really close and that I would probably miss them. But I value my freedom so much more and can always make new friends.
Let sleeping dogs lie. You cannot convince her that their way is wrong. She has to decide that for herself, the same as we all did.
You might try something like:
You speak of putting the past behind us, but then you go on extensively about the past in a long email. If we are to constantly bring up all of our past mistakes, then we will never get anywhere. I could go on at length about my grievances, but I choose not to because I truly love you.
If you truly mean what you say, we should stop hurting each other with our words and start accepting the fact that on some things we may never agree. Maybe we should agree to disagree about certain things, and just love each other unconditionally.
I'll start. I love you, unconditionally.
I hope you will love me unconditionally too.
Let's truly put the past behind us and show unconditional love to each other for the remaining time we have left.