Get Your Holy Ass Off My Sandwich

by dorothy 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • Scully


    That is just so rude. And one of the reasons why I no longer attend Special Assembly Days?. They really aren't Special?... they're just one fat ass sitting on your sandwich after another.

    Kind of adds new meaning to the term Spiritual Food?, though, doesn't it??

    Love, Scully

  • Special K
    Special K

    The sounds of "squash"..

    You mean she never felt a lunch box poking up her "arse"?

    Brain dead, butt dead.. or both. I bet you truly were very annoyed at this woman.

    Sounds like a trip to "subway" was in order...

    Special K

  • kls

    Geez that could have been some ones kid. Would she have said ,,,,sorry i hope i didn't squish them to much. Bet she had a nice lunch.,,,,,,,Honestly some people.

  • iiz2cool

    After thinking on this matter a little more I thought maybe this fine sister? was doing a very loving thing for you. Excessive eating at lunch time could cause you to become drowsy in the afternoon, perhaps even to the extent of making you fall asleep. Imagine the sorrow you would feel later on, upon discovering you missed out on some fine spiritual food? simply because you chose to satisfy your fleshly craving for sandwiches!

    I hope you thanked her.


  • shotgun

    Geez..don't you get it

    You were supposed to throw your hands in the air and with the deepest voice possible shout "It is a Blessing from JEEHOVAHHH, now my sandwich will feed a multitude"

    You do realize if you ate that sandwich you could become a crack addict!

    Oh..Oh..Why didn't you ask her if she had a bun in the oven to match the sandwich up her ass.

  • Mary

    Dorothy you should have said one of the following:

    1. Wow. A manna sandwich at the ASSembly hall; surely Jehovah is blessing me;
    2. I think you've got my peanut butter and jam filling on the back of your dress-----at least I HOPE that's what that is.....
    3. Get your larger-than-life-ass off my lunch, dingbat
    4. Can you please tell me where your lunch is so I can squish it into a pankcake?
    5. Thanks for nothing asshole.
  • Valis

    "An lo Jehovah did ressurect the sammich and it was one with Him"..Book of Assemblies, St. Valis 1:11


    District Overbeer

  • Stefanie

    Damn! You guys are giving me the giggles!

    Wow. A manna sandwich at the ASSembly hall; surely Jehovah is blessing me;

    Geez that could have been some ones kid.
  • blondie

    Makes you wonder what she really was doing.

    Trying to take your chairs....because the view was better?

    I can remember going out to the restroom after the morning session and coming back to find my stuff on the floor behind the chair and a family sitting in our chairs. I pointed out the books and lunch on the floor under the chairs, but they would not budge. I went and got an attendant and pointed out our belongings on the floor and the family occupying our chairs. They left then perhaps to confiscate someone else's chairs. I have heard of JWs taking stuff off chairs and to Lost and Found...although there were open chairs elsewhere.

    I would have asked her if she had her bottom checked by the doctor lately for numbness.

    That's when my 25% goes past 50%.

  • Special K
    Special K
    You do realize if you ate that sandwich you could become a crack addict!


    Man, there are some wicked funny responses on here.


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