Do you feel you will always be "different" from the "world" ?

by LyinEyes 37 Replies latest jw friends

  • El blanko
    El blanko

    Always felt like an outsider, whether in or out, before or after. Think I always will. But to be honest, I think I also prefer it that way. For me the JWs was an excuse to ditch stuff like Christmas and feel part of club-exclusive and I still do not celebrate Christmas - no point forcing the issue when it doesn't 'sit right'.

    None of the above is to say that I despise life or those who are close to me, but I simply do not fit in. I've tried for years.

    Plus, I do not like the bigger part of the society I live within. Again I've tried adjusting me vision, yet to no avail.

    So what do you do?

    Live with it I guess

  • dh

    i never felt like i was really part of anything, or the same as anyone, neither 'the world' or jw's, i always felt like i was just me, watching from the distance.

  • squinks

    Sadly, I too am Sad,

    At times I am bursting with joy because I am free, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to really feel the things I do (Christmas etc...)

    At times having been raised a JW feels like such a sad reality. But then there are other times. Times when I feel that I have an insight into human nature that some people just don't feel. This is hard, I have such deep feelings about this that it is hard to gather them together.

    The thing is that we have had the chance to live two lives. The juxtaposition of the JW belief system with that of "worldly" belief systems no matter which we have chosen represent polar opposites in so many ways. We understand the true power of what we teach our children because even as mature adults we have a hard time releasing what we were taught as children.

    What does that teach us?

    From it we can understand why racism is so pervasive. From it we learn why there is war or greed or genocide. Then we must find out what we can do - each of us individually to help make the world a better place. Because now that we are a part of the "world" we have a responsibility to it. When I remember and think about these things, I don't have time to be sad-too much to do so then. . . .

    Happily, I am Happy.

  • Soledad
    My JW upbringing was 30 years ago and I've never gotten over that feeling of being different. But I got a double whammy, because my dad was an unbeliever and so I was different within the congregation too. There was absolutely no place I could fit in. (still sorry for myself after all these years)

    God I know exactly how that feels!!

  • myauntfanny

    Thank you, Soledad. That makes me feel better (not that you feel bad about it too, just that someone knows how I feel).

  • Soledad

    thanks to you too! It's just that when I read your post it struck me deeply: not fitting in anywhere. I spent so many years in pain and in anger. it's so fortunate we have this message board!

  • gumby
    I wonder if I will always feel like I am still so very different from the rest of most everyone I know.

    There's a good chance you will Dede.

    The idea has been raised many times about how long the 'effects' of being a witness will last and this idea has been presented in many ways on various subjects. That answer is a tough one as so many are so different.

    I'm a believer in the idea that those who were "well shod" in the truth (snicker), have a much much harder time ever forgetting or feeling what they once knew as a witness at least some degree.

    Some of what the witnesses taught were truths that many of us still hold true in their heart. As an example.....I still do not like to salute the frickin flag! I think it's cultlike, stupid, and senseless. Evertime this issue come forth I'm reminded of what I was taught as a witness. These "occasions" like I just mentioned will act as triggers for life and it's these triggers that tell us we can't shake our former believe 100%

    How's that for a freakin smartypants answer fer ya little hair-in- the- egg finder you!

    Give Denny a pinch on the arse for me....K?


  • twolips

    I still feel different from the rest of the world. As if I have some strange outward scar.

    If you were taught from a very young age that you are different and can be no part of the world, you tend to believe it. I think of it like this = I will always dream in english, even if I learn another language fluently. Add to this being a shy child/person or some depression.

    I have met other people that were raised different religions. One friend that comes to mind was raised very strict catholic. He has the same feelings I do. It is not exslusive to the J.W. experiance I feel. We still feel it but come from different sets of circumstances.

  • kes152

    To Craig,

    May you have peace!

    If you wish to know, Craig, you will know. There is much proof of what I have been given to speak. And I have been told that the proof that you will receive will not come from me.. it will come directly from Him. I am fine with this because I have been given an 'understanding' of what that proof in part will be like, so I am not concerned. You will have such proof and when you do receive it, then you may have great trouble reconciling it with what you did not wish to believe. It will be at that time that you will have to "give up" what you did not want to believe, because it will not help you.


  • Narkissos

    Well, I always felt somewhat "different" but after reading the last post I almost feel "normal". Thanks!

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