Opinions on a letter i am sending my family

by jaredg 80 Replies latest jw friends

  • kls

    Excellent reply Jare, but remember you are not talking to your father ,you are communicating with a cult mind. If he response back it will be the same gibberish he sent before ,you can't get feelings out of stone.

  • cyber-sista

    Powerful letters Jered. You are doing a good job at keeping your head on straight and the lines of communication open with your family--even if your Dad's line of reasoning is a little frustrating. I guess we have to be patient in these cases.

    This is an especially powerful line of argument that stood out for me. I will use this one in the future--thanks, cybs

    Since the WTS currently rejects many of the teachings of its founder, Charles Taze Russell (who was president of the organization from 1879-1916), and since they also reject many of the teachings of "Judge" Joseph Franklin Rutherford, who succeeded Russell as president from 1916-1942, how can you be sure that in 25 more years, the WTS won't reject many of the teachings under current president, Milton Henschel (1992-present), as they did Russell and Rutherford? What kind of confidence can you have in an organization that rejected many of the teachings of its founder and first two presidents for the first 63 years of its existence - over 50% of the time they have existed?!
  • garybuss

    Actually I think Max Larson is president of the Watch Tower printing business now and William Van De Wall is president of Jehovah's Witnesses.

    The Witness group not only has discarded teachings, they have more noticeably changed practices like attaching parsonages to Kingdom Halls and accepting blood medical treatment.

    I enjoy my debates with Witnesses but I have come to the conclusion that it is never okay to talk about religion or anything Watch Tower Publishing related with a Witness if the goal is to keep rapport. If a Witness brings up religion I immediately direct the conversation to neutral ground.

    I correspond with a lot of Witnesses on line and in that context they feel me out and then when they are comfortable with me, they ask me questions and I answer those but I try to avoid exposing conflict or really ask them any questions of a controversial nature. Witness people are well aware of the social problems and the conflicts in the organization. Many of their meetings and much of the corporation prepared reading material is geared to denial or defense of the conflicts.

    I think the way to help Witnesses is a pragmatic human approach. Many of us were obsessed with our parents and confronted them on different levels with mixed results. Often it boils down to this. I can be right or I can have a relationship with my parents but I may not be allowed to do both. I can be right later. My parents won't be around forever. I can be right when they are gone:-) GaryB

  • Country Girl
    Country Girl


    I'm a big ole softie and I just started crying when I read your response to your Father. How painful this must be for you and your whole family! I can just feel all of your hearts breaking into a million pieces. Like your Father says: Keep the spirit of humility and love in all your dealings and you will automatically know what to say/do when the situation arises. You wrote an excellent letter, and I saved it because it was so thorough and thought provoking, without anger or bitterness shining through. Just an ernest quest for answers from a son and brother who wants to be real.

    I am sorry for you that you are going through this with your family. We all here (mostly) know how it feels, and we can all empathize with you. Please know that we're all behind you and wishing you the very best on how this turns out. Keep us updated, guy!

    Country Girl

  • ohiocowboy

    Jared, I am sorry that it has taken so long to get back to you on your letter. My busy season is just beginning again, good we all need money.

    I want to answer your questions one at a time. But I want to set some standards 1 st .

    1. Prov. 3:19-26 Please read that scrip. before going any further.

    2. Humility. I have to admit that I could be wrong. Why? Because I have been wrong in the past all humans will make mistakes, because we are all imperfect.

    3. I have to admit that the Society could be wrong. Why? Because they have been wrong in the past. Once is proof that it can happen again. All organizations will make mistakes because they are all composed of imperfect humans. (See point # 2)

    4. In light of the forgoing, what I want to hear from you is the same admission of fallibility that I just made to you. Are you will in to admit that you could be wrong, and that your ?advisors? could be wrong?

    5. Reasonable. The root word for reasonable in Greek is yielding. Will you be reasonable or yielding? I will try my best to be so.

    6. Open mind. If you view this as a competition, I am not interested in going any further. Our goal should be a mutual search, an investigation.

    7. Please read Ps. 111:10.

    Please give prayerful consideration to these points and give me some feedback, Love Dad

    If only my parents would have been so loving as to send me a letter like that. I do not really see any mind games in the letter, and I do not get bad vibes from it. What it shows me is that your Dad is loving and gracious enough to admit faults, and have an open mind in investigating and searching for the real truth with you. He said that will try his best to be reasonable and yielding, as long as you are too. Sounds really fair to me. It does not sound one sided at all to me, and cannot really see any alterior motives from the letter. It sounds to me like a very loving Father who still loves his son, even though you question the Society. Most parents would automatically shun and give one sided viewpoints and attitude defending the Society, but your father is willing to explore with you. Who knows, maybe by researching things together, your father will see for himself the hypocracy of the WTBTS.

    In addition, your letters have also been very lovingly and maturingly written, it shows me that you had a good upbringing in a loving household, and have a good head on your shoulders.

    I wish you the best with your future discussions with your family! It seems to be starting off on the right track...

  • codeblue

    I think your response to your Dad's letter was written quite well!!!

    I especially liked what you said:

    I still believe in Jehovah and Jesus and I want to be a good person and a Christ like person and that's what I feel I am doing now.

    How can your Dad still fault you knowing where your put your trust??? I know when I got baptized it was before they changed the questions, and I didn't dedicate myself to an organization. Jesus didn't get baptized to an organization either nor was he loyal to an organization.

    I hope to hear how your Dad responds again, if you can share that with us....

    Take care and many hugs,


  • jaredg

    i will definately keep you guys up to date on this. on a good note i had lunch with my mom in a public restaurant on friday of last week. it was a really good lunch, hardly any talk about JWs. she paind for lunch and gave me $50...whooohoooo.

  • Atilla

    Loved your letter, printed it out for future reference. It's such a fine line to walk with your parents without getting frustrated with their JW beliefs and then telling them to bugger off. Well, good luck.

  • zion sleeping
    zion sleeping

    Great information!!! But the only thing that bothers me, was the fact that they ask you to put it in writting??? This is going to come back @ you I fear.

  • jaredg

    i'm glad i put it in writing because i'm a lot better at collecting my thoughts. i don't think my parents would trun me in to the elders. there is some tension there and my dad has always been one to speak his mind. when he was the school overseer he got a lot of flack for keeping a brother on the school who had a rather large beard but he didn't back down. i think that's why he resigned as an elder. he said it was a strategical move but he didn't say why. anyway i'm not afraid of it being in writing.

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