WTS positives- A therapy project

by zugzwang 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • zugzwang
    zugzwang

    So my therapist told me that if I am ever going to heal emotionally and psychologically from the damage done by the WTS that I need to not just focus on the negative, but to think about how the WTS helped make me a better person. So here goes.

    I suppose it is because of the WTS that I never got involved with illegal drugs or gangs.

    Because of the WTS I was always a good student in school. (Although, because of the WTS I didn't go to college.)

    Because of the WTS (or more specifically, because of the congos in my area) I always had a lot of friends to hang out with. I never felt like a "loser" or "weird" because of being a Witness. I think this is due to the fact that their were a lot of young people who were Witnesses who grew up in the same town as myself and I always felt "popular" amongst that group.

    Because of the WTS I am much more aware of "the world's" hypocrisy. I'm not the least bit deceived by Bush or Kerry and their lies, whereas many people are actually brought up to believe these guys. With the WTS though, obviously no value was ever assigned to the promises of men (except those of the WTS).

    If it weren't for the WTS I think I would probably have been dead by now. I say this because I am a thrill seeker by nature, so had it not been for the WTS saying that it was wrong I probably would have been really into "thrill sports" such as sky diving or BASE jumping.

    In addition, I probably would have joined the military right after 9/11 if I hadn't been a Witness at the time. (As a Bethelite one of my favorite things about New York was seeing the skyline everyday. Seeing those buildings collapse and all of those people die really affected me.) I'm horrible even at video game warfare so I am sure I would be dead by now if I had joined the military and been sent to Iraq or Afghanistan. Thanks to being a Witness though (at the time) I didn't join. (Now seeing that Bush's war was based on lies and manipulation of facts I am glad that I didn't.)

    Because of the WTS teachings I remained a virgin until I got married. This kept me from getting any type of STD's.

    Because of the WTS I got to spend 5 years as a volunteer. (Three as a pioneer and two as a Bethelite) I call this a good thing because even though what I was volunteering for turned out to be negative it is still good to have been able to give myself to something bigger than myself and not be paid for it. I think everyone should volunteer for something if their circumstances allow for it. So while I have mixed feelings about the loss of time that I spent in "full time service" I do feel good about the fact that I had the desire to volunteer. That desire was no doubt implanted (for their own purposes of course) by the WTS.

    While at Bethel I got to live in NYC (the greatest city in the world) for free! (Except for the 5 and a half days of work at the big house every week.) The experience of living in that city I will never forget. Looking back, I wish I would have spent more time in the city. Rollerblading up and down the streets of Manhattan, the Broadway shows, the parks, the museums, just everything about the city was great. Had it not been for the WTS I would not have had that experience.

    I suppose there are more things if I think about it long enough. Of course, all of these good things have negative factors attached to them. But the trick that I am trying to learn is to not focus on the negative but to "glean" (there's a Bethel term) what positives I can from the first 27 years of my life. If I don't I may spend the next 27 years being bitter. I don't want to waste that much more time of my life.

    What about you? Can you think of any positive's that came from your association with the WTS? Any comments would be appreciated.

    (BTW, for any trolls out there, positives would not include stuff like "I learned about God's kingdom blah, blah, blah." You can waste your time trying to "get me to come back" but I won't let you waste mine.)

    zugz

  • gdt
    gdt

    Hi there...i enjoyed all the positives....really worthwhile and no doubt true.. could you perhaps think of one more, that of getting an appreciation of your creator, to be able to thank him for the good things of life, loke flowers, food, sleep, anything of joy that it is easy to say thanks for. and remember your dedication should have been to him, it seems more lilely that your dedocation was to the brotherhood perhaps, but it was a very fine summary of your years in the truth, thank you, don't get bitter please, cheers, gdt

  • Undecided
    Undecided

    My youth was spent as a JW. I had many fun times at assemblies and with my family. In my days as a youth there wasn't any drugs or much sex at school, so I can't say it protected me from anything. As I look back on my JW life I don't think I really believed it in my heart, I was just following the wishes of my parents and it was just part of my heritage. In my late thirties I just quit. I can't really say whether it was good or bad for me as I don't know what I would have been like had I not been raised as a JW. I've had a good life and been happy almost all the time. I think it may have had a negative effect on my finances as I didn't prepare for old age and didn't accept opportunites for better employment because I would have had to miss meetings. I can't blame anyone because it was my choice and I'm not angry at the JWs in general, but do have some issues with the GB who are guilty of destroying many lives because of their control ethics.

    Ken P.

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    How about developing a healthy sensitivity towards hypocricy and manipulative behavior?

    Once in a while a con-man wanders on to this site looking for an easy "mark". I notice they don't last long.

  • sinamongurl
    sinamongurl

    i had many friends all over the country including the islands. i traveled alot to see them. i stayed out of trouble, learned how to be a well-rounded person, learned how to get along with both young and old, and gained knowledge and appreciation for Jehovah.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    Now that you mention it, I guess there WERE some positive things that I learned when I was a JW. I was a VERY shy child, and all but fainted when having to stand up in class and recite anything or give a current event report.

    Although I suffered full-blown panic attacks when giving a talk, I DID manage to take away the courage to speak to others in a public setting. Not having to be "timed" and speaking about a subject that I was passionate about (not a WTS manipulated topic) was a "plus", and I don't believe I'd have EVER done that had I not had the training at the KH. (Did *I* say that?) LOL!

    Actually I did much better in Field Service than I did at the the KH in front of other JWs! (Go figure) So the many presentations in front of the somewhat hostile School Board (I was fighting for rights for the handicapped and Special Ed kids and the "Board" was NOT receptive when I showed them what they were NOT doing for our kids according to Federal laws---they really didn't want to see me coming, believe me, because they HAD to comply or have federal funding cutbacks!)

    Anyway---if not for the TMS, and also having to face strangers on their own doorsteps and talk about "religion"---I'd have never been in a position to stand up for the kids in front of MORE people that didn't particularly "want to talk to me" or who didn't WANT to hear what I had to say! (smile)

    I quickly learned how to stay away from meetings at the KH-and not feel guilty about not gulping down dinner and racing out the door twice a week, and sleeping in on Sunday mornings almost made me giggle with happiness! The WTS taught me how MUCH I valued my time to myself and how I wanted to spend that time---other then a WTS-planned activity!

    hugs,

    Annie

  • Confucious
    Confucious

    I'm trying to recover too.

    I think the BEST thing that I could say is that I receive tremendous FREENESS of SPEECH.

    Please let me explain.

    Right now, I'm searching God and Jesus.

    I'm NOT worrying about pleasing them by how closely I could follow the Bible.

    Rather, RIGHT NOW, I'm focused more MY RELATIONSHIP with them.

    Before, my whole thing was how RIGHTEOUS I could become by WORKS.

    But I feel good, because I lived 10 years of self denial as a Pioneer because of my love of God.

    So NO ONE could accuse me of "wanting out" because I want to live an immoral lifestyle or whatever.

    I lived VERY strictly.

    And I would again if that was what I felt it would take.

    But before you criticize me (talking about the JW), you had better had at least 10 years of full time service behind you.

    I did that. And that was MY PROOF that I'm willing to go to all lengths to prove my loyalty to Christ.

    Confucious

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    I met my husband and two of my children met their mates there. That's a positive.

    I learned how to speak in front of an audience, even if it wasn't TO the audience. Since then I've had to speak to large audiences at seminars, and have no problem.

    I learned how to manage my time to get a great deal done in a short amount of time, to fit in meetings and service into a busy family schedule.

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha

    I've learned how to deal with pushy salesmen and con-artists. I got two wonderful children I wouldn't have had. I've got this sneaky suspicion time ain't linear at all.

  • proplog2
    proplog2

    Zugzwang:

    Does your therapist have a preferred type of therapy?

    It should be noted that the positives mentioned don't mean that these people think JW's are "right" . But excessive anger at people or organizations is a symptom that a person has some irrational issues that need to be worked on.

    It is one thing to say Jehovah's Witnesses are wrong and it's another to say that they are wicked, horrible.

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