Danny's motto/credo: well living IS the best revenge and I kill the enemy besides.
When is it gonna stop?
by Obviously Secret 21 Replies latest jw friends
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new light
Hey OS, how are ya? I agree with you. Stress is bad. Life sucks when you are always under stress. However, breaking free from a lifelong mindset is going to be stressful. If it wasn't, you wouldn't have anything to break free of in the first place. If you are trying to leave the organization, that stress really is the pain of growing. It will pass.
Secondly, you are 16 and I assume living with your JW parents. I know when I was your age and DF'ed and living at home, I could not even eat. Realize that for independent adults who have broken free, coming to this board is a source of pleasure, intellectual stimulation, and friendship. As I have said before, what greater bond could there be other than family? We have been through a war, my friend, and we need to stay here to help the thousands of people who want to escape. This is serious business.
Whether or not you decide to stay here is up to you, and I sincerely hope your soul finds happiness, wherever that may be. The stress you are feeling now could very well lead to serenity, if you follow your instincts. Good luck, bro.
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blondie
Actually this reminds me of other support groups I have been in...Al-Anon, ACOA, and various abuse support groups. I have dealt with my personal demons but stick around to help others. No one ever really "graduates." Having been caught in the "spider's web" I know how people need help to get out. It is the difference from being a victim to becoming a survivor. I went to a conference re fighting clergy sexual abuse. The keynote speaker was a survivor of abuse and had moved past her need for "help" but had dedicated her life to speaking about and helping others become survivors. At 66, she said it will never be completely gone. Spiritual abuse is no different.
Blondie
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ezekiel3
Ob Secret: you mentioned JWs as "the enemy". Two phrases for you: Know yourself and Know your enemy.
For me, although individual JWs are not my enemy (they are in fact great people on the whole) the concept that binds them is. Like you, it is something I bear and watch closely because I want to know my enemy, my personal struggle between what I am force-fed and what nourishment I am actually hungry for. That is why I joined this site as a participant - to know myself.
If JWs were really concerned about the Truth and "Satan's machinations", they would be logging on to this site every day - to know their enemy. And yet, they happily corral themselves in the gates of ignorance. The fact is that JW's way of life is but a fragile house of cards that only stands in the mind of each JW.
Knowledge is power and you cannot "unlearn" a concept. Either this site has had no effect on you, or you will carry what you have learned here back into the organization. JWD is not just a bitch session.
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Markfromcali
when do you feel that the WTS will be out of your system.
Its not a question of when. If we take "your system" as the psychological mind, then its more a matter of "you" not being in that system. Working with it would only be a matter of rearranging things, but people do not realize the nature of mind is beyond the psyche, and very often not particularly interested either. If you just want kind of a normal life most people out there are living, then that's what you are going to focus on. Being free in this sense would be something very different.
In a sense its the difference between trying to sort out a very complicated mess, keep some pieces and try to discard others, and abandoning it all for a totally fresh start. (which would involve more than discontinuing a course of action and going in a new direction) The latter is what might be considered drastic measure, most people are not willing to go there. But the question that has to be asked is does the first way work? Maybe it works to a certain extent, you get relative clarity and relief, but does it ultimately really work? I think it is critical to have a stable psyche in the beginning, but it really only gets you so far.
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Obviously Secret
ya I get what everybodies talkin bout. I got a problem with sticking around places for too long, I always feel like I don't belong even in a place like this. So I dunno. Just wondering. Thanks for all the replies.
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imallgrowedup
OS -
If there is ever place that you DO belong - it is here! You have more people pulling for you and who care about you here than anywhere else, I would venture to guess. With all due respect, O, you need us - and we need you, too. It is okay to need people and to need an outlet. You have some serious baggage - and although I am sure you are sincere when you say that you think you will only last here for about two months, I think you wlll find that the support you get here, and the friends you make here will compel you to stay longer.
fwiw - it is my observation that most who have been around for a while don't spend as much time in the "You're never going to guess what the WT did now" threads as they did when they first came to the board. Most have made friends and spend a lot of time just communing with them because this is a place where they feel they belong. It is okay to feel like you belong here, OS - because you do. And there are so many who love and care about you - including me! So go with it! Allow yourself the luxury of friends who don't make fun of you and who accept you just the way you are. And realize that most of the people here have a great deal of respect for the incredible insight your 16-year-old mind brings to this board. You are worthy of the friendships you are making here - and you deserve to allow them to blossom. Just let it happen and everything will turn out fine!
growedup
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notperfectyet
OS,
Man I envy you, I wish I was 16 again. So much life to look forward too, so much energy. You could be a doctor in 8 years!
Go for life, don't hang around the puter like us old farts who whine about their pasts. Life is for the living, and it is a present! <get it..present..never mind >
NPY of the you'll miss me when I'm gone class.......
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Obviously Secret
lol thanks imall and not. I never feel like I belong just a personal thing I got.
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notperfectyet
OS
I have never felt like I belonged to anything. It can be a good thing, you just need to find your own niche.
You are going to be fine, <pats your head>
When you are out of the norm, that is where geniuses are born.
I am not saying I am a genius, but at 16 with your attitude and writing skills,
You go boy!