cult marriages

by No Apologies 15 Replies latest jw friends

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  No Apologies

  Ok, I had a thought the other day, and since that is a relatively rare event, I thought I would share it.

  Remember the moonies and their mass weddings? Maybe they still have them, I don't know. I don't know enough about them to know just what the point was, or the rationale for something like this. But then I got to thinking about some of the JW philosphy on marriage and finding a suitable marriage mate. Although the Borg has said much about the need to be selective in choosing a marriage mate, oftentimes you can hear the sentiment that "as long as they both love Jehover, they can make a success of marriage."

  Of course,most people (even dubs) knows that is not necessarily true. But what I realized is that maybe its the same thing with the moonies. Just assign everyone a mate, get them married, and it will all work out somehow.

  Anyway, that was my brilliant insight for the day... comments?

  No Apologies ( of the faulty-light-bulb class)
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  Scully

  It seems that in the JWs that the institution of marriage is more about perpetuating the Headship Doctrine? and the Wifely Subjection Doctrine? than it is about finding someone who is a good match for the people involved.

  If they were truly interested in the welfare of the young people, they wouldn't treat them so harshly (DFing them, putting them on Public Reproof?) for having sexual relationships before marriage. They would allow young people to find out if they are completely compatible before committing to a marriage, even if that meant that they choose to live together before marriage.

  Instead, you have scads of JW teenagers rushing into marriage with partners who don't even have each other's best interests at heart, let alone know what they want in life. One of the biggest unspoken reasons they have for wanting to get married is so that they have a licence that allows them to be sexually active with their spouse, and not have to face consequences with the Elders?.

  Love, Scully
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  Yerusalyim

  Actually, there's something to be said for arranged marriages.
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  Scully

  Yeru writes:

  Actually, there's something to be said for arranged marriages.

  True, but I'm not inclined to breach the Posting Guidelines about swearing in order to say that something. Love, Scully
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  Hunyadi

  Here, here! skully!

  Instead, you have scads of JW teenagers rushing into marriage with partners who don't even have each other's best interests at heart

  That is really the number one cause of divorce: going into a marriage asking yourself, "what am I getting out of this?", instead of, "what can I contribute?"

  I once read that the greatest definition of love is: "Having the best interests of another at heart (especially spiritually) before you own."

  Good comment skully!

  Corvin
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  Elsewhere

  That would be creepy weird to me... bringing home a total stranger.

  So, shall we f**** now or would you like to get to know me better?
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  Stefanie

  So, shall we f**** now or would you like to get to know me better?

  Sounds like something Austin Powers would say...

  "shall we shag now or shag later"
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  Nosferatu

  you have scads of JW teenagers rushing into marriage with partners who don't even have each other's best interests at heart, let alone know what they want in life.

  Just to expand on this, one of the problems I see is that JW youths haven't experienced what they like and don't like in a member of the opposite sex. When I actually sat down and put a list together of what I wanted and didn't want in my "ideal" mate, I became much more selective. I was also able to add to the list. There's a lot of challenge in finding an ideal mate, but it's extremely rewarding when you succeed.
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  JeffT

  Most of the witness kids I've known over the years (and I suspect this problem has gotten worse since I left), have no clue how to function in the real world. They don't know how to work out a relationship without some one standing over their shoulder, they don't know how to get along in the work place. Most of them don't even know how to budget family income.

  One of the functions of all the social events that JW's aren't allowed to participate in, is to let gets learn what they like and don't like about other people so they can form all kinds of relationships: marriages, friendships, even people to avoid etc. The Watchtower's methods of raising children are a recipe for disaster.
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  Elsewhere

  Hey baby... get ready to ride the Coaster 'O Love!!!!