Elder's visit

by brooklynNY 27 Replies latest jw friends

  • brooklynNY
    brooklynNY

    Hello everyone:

    I haven?t posted much in the past. However, I enjoy reading the many topics.

    I would like your thoughts regarding the following:

    After no contact with anyone in my former congregation (aside from being shunning) for the last eight years, I walk into work this morning and check my voice mail to find I have a message from one of the elders. Basically he said that the friends miss me and he wanted to get together to talk. And also he also invited me to the Memorial. I didn?t realize it was that time of the year. This particular elder and I served as MS together when I was still in, and from what I remember, he was a bit of a kiss @ss and overly pious.

    I have been reading some of the posts regarding the elders visiting inactive ones on the pretense of being concern, but actually are trying to find out if you still consider yourself still a JW. I not DF or DA, and I couldn?t care less how they mark their records. However my mother is still in so her sake I don?t give them a reason to DF me. That being said, I would like to meet with these elders and present the latest UN stuff, and ask about the "generation" issue. I realize their motives for seeing me isn?t out of love and I?m sure the "friends" could care less about my well being, I just want to hear how they explain these two issues.

    I would like some advice on how to present these topics to them without sounding too confrontational. Any thoughts.

    Thanks

    brooklynNY

  • shotgun
    shotgun

    In your situation I don't think you should bother with them, tell them thanks for the invitation you'll think about it.

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu

    I agree with Shotgun. After 8 years they contact you? What kind of love is that? Don't you think people should get over you after a couple of years? 8 years is a long time to begin missing someone.

    If I were in your situation, I'd just delete the voicemail and continue on with your life.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Every year the elder body is directed in the KM to try to invite all the inactive ones in their congregation to the Memorial. There must be a lot of inactive people if it took 8 years to get down to your name on the list.

    Blondie

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Shun them! Pretend you never got the message and get on with your life!

    After no contact with anyone in my former congregation (aside from being shunning) for the last eight years, I walk into work this morning and check my voice mail to find I have a message from one of the elders.

    It only took eight years for them to miss you! Now that makes you feel missed and loved right?

    However my mother is still in so her sake I don?t give them a reason to DF me.

    They have an agenda and you stand to loose contact with your own mother. It's not worth it IMHO. You can't win this and the loss is too great.

    Kate

  • Mary
    Mary

    I agree with the rest of the posts. If you don't want to be DF'd, I wouldn't even acknowledge their phonecall. And I would certainly not bring up any doctrinal issues with them, otherwise they'll have you charged with apostasy and they could very easily disfellowship you.

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    The best way to get on their radar screen is to meet with them. The best way to get shunned I am aware of, is to confront them with anything at all.

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan

    Just delete the message.

    No good can come from getting mixed up with them.

  • bebu
    bebu

    Well, it can take you 8 years to get back to them, using their own time frame.

    bebu

  • brooklynNY
    brooklynNY

    Thanks for the responses.

    As much as I would like to stick it to them with the UN issue, it's probably best to not return their call. Like I said in my original post, I could care less of what these hypocrites think. I just don't want to put my mother in the position of choosing.

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