Mine is from Friday, the movie with Ice Cube, where a couple of JW ladies wake up Ice Cube's character's family one morning and there's some mouthing off, and you wouldn't believe the nasty words coming out of these sweet looking old "sisters". Hilarious!
what's your favority JW reference from a movie or TV ?
by itsallgoodnow 35 Replies latest jw friends
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Sirius Dogma
My favorite is from Monty Python's Flying Circus -
Mother: What have you got now?
Chris: I bought an ant, mother.
Mother: What d'you want one of them for! I'm not going to clean it out. You said you'd clean the tiger out, but do you? No, I suppose you've lost interest in it now. Now it'll be ant, ant, ant for a couple of days, then all of a sudden, 'oh, mum, I've bought a sloth' or some other odd-toed ungulate like a tapir.
Chris: It's really different this time, mum. I'm really going to look after this ant.
Mother: That's what you said about the sperm whale... now your papa's having to use it as a garage.
Chris: Well, you didn't feed it properly.
Mother: Where are we going to get forty-four tons of plankton from every morning? Your papa was dead vexed about that. They thought he was mad in the dell.
Chris: Well at least he's got a free garage. (growl from the tiger)
Mother: That's no good to him... his Hillman smells all fishy. (we hear a roar) Oh blimey, that's the tiger. He'll want his mandies.
Chris: Are you giving that tiger drugs?
Mother: 'Course I'm giving it drugs!
Chris: It's illegal.
Mother: You try telling that to the tiger.
Chris: I think it's dangerous.
Mother: Listen ... before he started fixing, he used to get through four Jehovah's witnesses a day. And he used to eat all of them, except the pamphlets.
Chris: Well he's not dim.
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Nosferatu
Probably on South Park where Satan is meeting all the new arrivals in hell. One said, "But I'm a Jehovah's Witness, why am I here". Satan says, "Sorry, but the correct religion was the Mormons"!
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City Fan
The bit in Airplane is pretty funny where the captain is trying to run through the terminal and keeps getting stopped by religious types like the moonies, mormons, Jehovahs Witnesses. He ends up punching and throwing them all out of his way.
Spike Milligan did a sketch once, years and years ago, where he was a Jehovahs Witness boxer!! He had his hands tied behind his back while the other boxer just hit him. Between every round it cut to a large crowd at a district assembly loudly clapping! (not sure how they filmed that!).
I also remember some detective program which had a Jehovahs Witness character in it. The guy looked a bit of a nerd with large NHS spectacles on and a large tweed coat. I turned to my brother and said -"well he sure looks like a witness!!" He just cracked up, then I got a clip round the ear from mother!
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itsallgoodnow
those are both fabulous!
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Country Girl
Saw an episode of "Cops" the other night. From Phoenix. They were called to a house in which the inhabitants thought they had a ghost. They had found a headstone in their yard, and had it on the table, and they said that the guy who lived there before was haunting them: they'd seen shadows, and the ghost picked up this guy's wife's hand in the middle of the night. The cop suggested a visit to the Catholic Church, and then an exorcism. The guy said that they were Christians. The cops asked them if they were Jehovah's Witnesses, and after adamant denials, they said they were not Jehovah's Witnesses, but drinking and smoking Christians. Hehhehehe. Looked like they had more liquid spirits than ghostly spirits!
CG
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No Apologies
Reno911 on Comedy Central had an awesome bit a while back. Two cops in a patrol car see these two guys with ties and bookbags walking down the street. They jump out of the squad car, guns drawn, start screaming at the two to drop their bags, hit the ground. They tell them that they are looking for a couple of robbers matching their description. By this time the two guys are laying on the ground, almost peeing their pants, insisting they are innocent. The cops look through their bags, see the literature, then apologize and let them go.
The cops get back in the car, one laughs and says, "I just like giving them a hard time!" Too Funny!!!!!
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funkyderek
From The Simpsons:
Lisa: Hey! People are coming! I think they're Jehovah's Witnesses.
Marge: Yes!
Noreen: Wait, Marvin, I just had a thought. Maybe we're bothering people by trying to change their religion. What if we don't have all the answers?
Marvin: You're right, Noreen. Let's go get real jobs. -
Ghosthunter
Seinfeld. Elaine's roommate complaining about JW's being let into the building.
GH
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Phantom Stranger
The absolute, all-time best was the old Saturday Night Live Land Shark sketch... where there's a knock at the door - "who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness". Thinking it's the Land Shark, they jerk open the door, club Garrett Morris on the top of the head with a baseball bat, and he falls into the apartment - wearing a suit and carrying a bookbag with actual Watchtower and Awake magazines falling out of it all over the floor! Priceless!
Always wondered which Bethel street-Witness they got the mags from...