If Morrisey Was a Jdub

by gitasatsangha 45 Replies latest social humour

  • rem
    rem

    YOU'RE THE ONE FOR ME, FATTY Elder Wannabe

    You're the one for me, fatty,
    You're the one I really, philia love.
    And I will do more,
    Promise you'll say if I'm in the way
    (of your theocratic goals)

    You're the one for me, fatty,
    You're the one fatty Elder Wannabe.
    And no one seems to say,
    18 is too young to ge married, yay
    Ah-hey.

    All over the Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.
    All over the Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.

    You're the one for me, fatty,
    It's your #4 talks I really, really love.
    And I will stay,
    Promise you'll say if I'm in your way.

    You're the one for me, fatty Elder Wannabe,
    You're the one that's really, moving up.
    And I will stay,
    Late after meeting for the elder meet-angs
    Ah-hey.

    All over the Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.
    All over Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.

    You're the one for me, fatty,
    You've memorized the Kingdom Melodies.
    And I will stay,
    Promise you'll never get a real career.

    You're the one for me fatty Elder Wannabe,
    You're the one for me-a-hey . . .

    rem

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha

    Ted Jaracz On The Guillotine

    DF'd people
    Have a wonderful dream
    Ted Jaracz On The Guillotine
    Cause people like you
    Make me feel so tired
    When will you die ?
    When will you die ?
    When will you die ?
    When will you die ?
    When will you die ?

    And people like you
    Make me feel so old inside
    Please die

    And DA'd people
    Do not shelter this dream
    Make it real
    Make the dream real
    Make the dream real
    Make it real
    Make the dream real
    Make it real

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    LOL REM!

    All over the Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.
    All over the Territory,
    Some hope and some despair.

    Frankly Mister Elder

    Frankly mister Elder this position I've held

    A servant - and it corrodes my soul

    I want to leave

    You will not miss me

    I want to go down in apostate History, Mister Elder

    Frankly Mr Elder I'm a sickening Wreck

    I've got 2034 breathing down my neck

    I must move fast, you undertand me

    I want to go down in apostate history

    Happiness and apostacy

    I can play hideous tricks on the brothers,

    And I'd rather be apostate than "righteous" or "holy"

    Any day, any day, any day

    And sometimes I feel more fulfilled

    Drinking and dancing at apostofests

    and Yes I mean to be so rude

    I must speak frankly Mister Elder.....

    Frankly mister elder since were in this JC

    You are a flatulent pain in the ass

    and Yes I mean to be so rude

    So stick it up your do dah mr Elder

    Oh leave me alone.....

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    ROFL
    You guys crack me up

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Oh God I'm addicted.

    The Governing Body is Dead (previously The Queen is Dead)

    Farewell to Bethel's cheerless hallways

    Hemmed in - I worked for no money

    The Governing Body with their heads in a sling

    I'm truly sorry but it sounds like a wonderful thing!

    Ted don't you ever crave to appear on the front of the Daily Mail, dressed in Mrs Franz's bridal veil?

    Woah Woah oh oh

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    And the way they protected pedo's oh oh these are the things that KILL me

    So I checked in the library for some reliable facts and I was shocked and ashamed to discover

    That for 10 years they've been romping with some Wild Beast or other

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    Whilst some 10 year old dub peddles mags

    I swear to God I swear I never even knew what FACTS were

    So I broke into the main office

    With a King James and a rusty spanner

    He said "I know you and you're an apostate"

    I said "Thats nothing, I masturbated all through gilead"

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    Oh has the Society changed or have I changed?

    But when you're tied to The Mother's apron, no one talks about masturbation! woahhh woahhhh oh oh

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Unhappy Birthday

    I've come to wish you an Unhappy Birthday

    I've come to wish you an Unhappy Birthday

    Cos you're evil and you lie and you know you will die

    I may feel slightly sad but I won't cry

    "In the truth then left" as some may say

    You think its nothing, surely you know the Devil makes you feel that way?

    You say "No" "I'm gonna kill myself"

    Well drink, drink drink and be ill tonight!

    From the one you left behind,

    from the one you left behind....

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Cemetry Gates

    A dreaded sunny day, so I meet you at the cemetry gates

    Russell and Rutherford are on your side

    A dreaded sunny day, so I meet you at the cemetry gates

    Russell and Rutherford are on your side, but Bowen is on mine

    So we go inside and we gravely read the stone

    Russell and his life, where is he now?

    With hates, and madness and brainwashing (just like you)

    he was born and then he lived and then he died

    Its so unfair, I want to cry

    You say "He taught the truth and light gets brighter"

    and claim these words as your own

    But I've read well and I've read the facts

    A hundred times maybe less maybe more!

    If you must say stupid things, the words you use should be your own

    Don't spout the Borg or Watchtower

    Theres always an apostate, somewhere, with a big nose who KNOWS

    and trips you up and laughs when you fall

    He'll trip you up and laugh when you fall

    You say "The gentile times ended 1914"

    Words which could only be your own,

    but then you produce the text from whence was ripped:

    "Some dizzy git 1894"

    A dreaded sunny day, so we go where we're happy and I meet you at the cemetry gates

    Russell and Rutherford are on your side

    A dreaded sunny day, so we go where we're wanted and I meet you at the cemetry gates

    Russell and Rutherford are on your side,

    BUT YOU LOSE cos Bow-ow-ow-ow- wen is on mine"n" !

  • Pleasuredome
    Pleasuredome

    william, it was really nothing

    The rain falls hard on a humdrum hall
    This hall has dragged you down
    Oh, the rain falls hard on a humdrum hall
    This hall has dragged you down
    Oh, no, and everybody?s got to live their life
    And God knows I?ve got to live mine
    God knows I?ve got to live mine
    Pioneer, pioneer it was really nothing
    Pioneer, pioneer it was really nothing
    It was my life ...

    How can you stay with a congregation who?ll say :
    Oh ! would you like to volunteer ?
    And if you like you can pioneer
    They dont care about anything
    Would you like to volunteer ?
    And if you like you can pioneer
    They don?t hassle anyone - except myself !
    Oh, pioneer, pioneer it was really nothing
    Pioneer, pioneer

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha

    Russellite Ruffians

    The last day of Convention

    By the big wheel generator

    Apostate is nabbed

    Camcorder is grabbed

    And the Talk hangs heavy like a dulling wine

    She is modest

    She is charming

    An engagement ring

    Doesn't mean a thing

    To a mind consumed by Pioneering

    And though I walk home alone

    I might walk home alone ...

    ...and my faith in God is now in doubt

    The last day of the Convention

    From a seat in "Hard of Hearing"

    Her skirt ascends for a watching eye

    It's a hideous trait (on her mother's side)

    From a seat in "Hard of Hearing"

    Her skirt ascends for a watching eye

    It's a hideous trait (on her mother's side)

    And though I walk home alone

    I might walk home alone ...

    ...and my faith in God is now in doubt

    Then someone meets John Barr

    And someone's written up

    someeone's written up

    And the senses being dulled are mine

    And someone falls in love

    A kid is beaten up

    And the senses being dulled are mine

    And though I walk home alone

    I might walk home alone ...

    ...and my faith in God is now in doubt

    This is the last day of Convention

    And the grease in the hair

    Of a sweating Attendant

    Is all a tremulous heart requires

    A sister is denied

    She said : "How quickly would I die

    If I jumped from the top of the bleachers ?"

    La ...

    This is the last day of Convention

    And the grease in the hair

    Of a sweating Attendant

    Is all a tremulous heart requires

    A sister is denied

    She said : "How quickly would I die

    If I jumped from the top of the bleachers ?"

    La ...

    and ... scratch my name on your nametag with a fountain pen

    (This means you really love me)

    Scratch my name on your nametag with a fountain pen

    (This means you really love me)

    Oh ...

    And though I walk home alone

    I just might walk home alone

    and my faith in God is now in doubt

    I might walk home alone

    and my faith in God is now in doubt

    I might walk home alone

    and my faith in God is now in doubt

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Elder Sleeping, Girl being DF'd

    Always looking for attention
    always needs to be mentioned
    there'll be no fuss
    she was...NOBODY'S NOTHING
    who does she
    think she should be?
    the shrill cry through the hall

    doesn't she know he's already
    had such a busy day?

    SOMEBODY TELL HER...SHHH
    It was only a test
    but she went too far
    against the "rules"
    she deserves all she gets
    the carpark became red and dark
    as an out-stretched arm slowly
    disappears

    OH HURRAY
    Please don't worry

    When he awoke
    the sea was calm
    and another day passes like a dream

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