Can you remember some of the good things brother and sisters did for you?

by LyinEyes 25 Replies latest jw friends

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  Mulan

  We have some really good friends (still JW's and still our good friends...........especially the wife) who have been there for us, through thick and thin, and vice versa.

  When my brother's wife died, they came over and even mowed our lawn while we were with the family for days on end. When I was in the hospital after our 4th child was born in 1979 (he was 6 weeks premature, emergency C section) she took over at my house, making meals for my family, and took Princess (Rachel) to school the first day of school.The older boys were in high school and middle school, so able to go alone to school. The baby was delivered the day before school started that year, on September 4. She arranged everything for me to have help at home for two weeks after I came home, including meals, cleaning and shopping, and she scheduled herself for several of the days to be with me.

  There are many more things, much too numerous to mention, including helping my aged parents when I need help, and treating them like her own parents.

  She was and still is an absolute JEWEL.
• 

  mouthy

  Isnt it good that some of us have good memories of individuals with in the cult. I think most of them were great when they entered really- we just became self rightous when we were told we were special people working for God... That was nice Mulan ( as you are ) lyingeyes & winston.TOO.. That is why we are OUT cos God didnt want us to be fooled anymore!!! ( ducking)
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  simplesally

  I remember when I had my baby............... I was always active and at the meetings........the congregation arranged for meals for 2 weeks for us.....including my mom. Everyone wanted to see my doll. It was very touching because my husband (now ex) was pretty much inactive and almost never at the meetings. I was 9 months pg dragging Sassy out in service. I did try.

  They were delicious meals and even dessert was brought.

  When I went to the meetings sisters would try to take my daughter so I could have a break.........she slept mostly (she was 3 weeks when I started taking her, I went 5 days after delivering). But I do remember the good things...........
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  LukeN

  i dont know if this counts but the picnics and outsidings the bible study group would go on
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  LyinEyes

  I appreciate everyones replies because I truly believe we are on the healing path when we can look back without total bitterness. If you would have asked me a year ago ,,,,,I would have been so bitter, I would have thought " oh they only did it to impress the elders," etc. etc. I was so angry still that a cloud was in my eyes seeing my whole life as a lie.

  As time went on,,,,,,, I saw that things were not black and white.........all things in my life dealing with JW's were not evil and bad. There were good lessons taught, as in any religion, as in any home life, right and wrong. When you can get over the pain, the bitterness and the anger,,,,,,,,,allow the good things , even thou they may be small, to make you smile........you are really on the path to healing and moving on.
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  Lady Lee

  I too will not forget some of the kindnesses shown to me by some

  When I was pregnant with my second child I was on Drs orders of complete bed rest. I had a 4 yr old at home with me at the time and my husband was a MS heading towards being an elder. Several sisters made meals for us and one would take my daughter to her place for a few hours.

  I used to arrange picnics in the park after the Sunday meetings and we had a great time playing ball and sharing food (well until the WTS ended it all)

  During the summers a bunch of sisters with kids would get together and once every 2 weeks all get together with the kids for an activity - tour of the city or visit a park. We even arranged a trip to the fire station. And the deaf sisters and children were always included. One little fellow who had some hearing just beamed with delight when the firemen allowed him to blow the horn on the firetruck and he heard it.

  And there were always those who were ready to help us move when we needed it.

  One sister and I always got together on Friday nights to do our shopping leaving the kids at home with the husbands. We had a great time and always went for coffee (or ice cream) after. I miss her a lot.

  I remember as if it was yesterday the sister who clasped my hand and welcomed me home after 3 years in foster care (and being away from my family)

  A great deal of the time I felt like I didn't belong (well I guess I didn't cuz I'm here now) but there were those special people that remain in my mind and heart. I hope some have found a way to be free.
• 

  LyinEyes

  I think that in any religion, any community, etc. you are going to have good people.......they may be misguided as we were once, but as a whole mankind is basically good I believe. Now I am able to separate the little old sister who had not a bad word to say against anyone, from the evil ones who hid, who continue to hide and hurt these good people who have not yet had the chance to see anything other than the JW world. I was one,,,,,,,,,raised as a JW all of my life,,,,,,,,I thank my lucky stars that I found my way out.......Maybe Mouthy was right that we were in a way choosen to in a way to get out so that we may can help others. Maybe getting out , was the only way in the end we would survive. If i would have stayed a JW ,,,,,,, I dont know I would be here today.

  I give credit where it is due, and there are certain ones that stand out in my mind , who in the beginning of my exodus,,,,helped me to understand, by their love and patience with me, that I was being mislead.

  I only hope that in some small way I can give back,,,,,,,,to the new ones who are doubting if they made the right choice in coming to this site,,,,,to just listenand that it is ok to look on their lives and make their own minds up.
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  Insomniac

  When I was 15 and starving (I'd left home to escape abuse) this really cool young guy, who was raised in the borg but not baptised yet, actually asked me how I was doing. When I said I was ok, he said Bulls@#t, how come you look so yellow?" and then made me some food. I mean, of my whole congregation, he was the only one to really concern himself with my plight.

  After that, he fed me a lot, and occasionally gave me a ride when I had no transportation. He checked out my first apartment to be sure it was secure and safe. He even gave me some work in his family's business so I could make a few bucks. Never once took advantage of me, even when I developed a crush on him for a few months. He was one of the most humane people I've known, and I never was able to tell him how much his kindness meant to me.
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  LyinEyes

  Insomniac,,,,,,,love the name, I am with ya on that one...lol. That seems like that brother, was a great person.........have you tried to contact him and thank him for his kindness? I think I am going to write some letters to certain ones that did things for me,,,,,,,,even if they don't respond back,,,,,,,,,I want them to know how much I appreciated it.

  You know I was talking about a gay friend of mine, and how I wanted to get in touch with him. I am not sure how he will take it. You know some can be marked, d/f and yet still if you are "apostate' even some of them will not want anyting to do with you. I highly doubt " D" will be that way , if he is anything like he was all those years growing up, but you just never know.

  I want to thank him for the time we were all out to eat after a meeting , as we did often,,,,,,,and it was shortly after my mother committed suicide.......well Sister Shithead,,,,,,,,,,,made a statement , at the very table i was at , that my mother had no chance of a resurrection. Well this guy ,,,,,,,who everyone at that time, knew was leading a double life and one that was in such contrast to their ways, being gay....stood up and told her to shut her piehole mouth up and to not judge Ms. Lura as he called my mom. He said if she didnt receive a resurrection for the pain she went thru on this earth ,,,,,,,,,,that no one at that table would be worthy as she would to be remember by Jehovah..... I clapped and went over to my "D" and cried,,,,,,,thanking him for having the guts to say what he did.

  So I owe "D" a letter,,,,,,,,,regardless if he response,,,,,,, to thank him for that,,,not just for me, but for my Mom. I know if she could have been there she would have been so pleased to hear the outcast, the marked one, stand up to the witch and tell her like it was. If my mom was /is in heaven, I am sure she had a good laugh and a smile on her face when he did that.
• 

  talesin

  When I was a kid, we had an elder who lived next door.

  He was a gentle spirit, a nice guy, and to this day, still talks to me when I see him. Not about the religion, but genuinely asks "How are you?" chats a bit. Only says, "miss you" when we part.

  And I know he means it - he was my friend.

  thanks for the thread, it's good to remember the 'real' people

  t