Hi Leeny ,
It is amazing that you have got to this place in your life , being with someone who loves you and realising that the WT is not the be all and end all of life .
You say that sometimes you do worry that they MIGHT be right and that troubles you . Well others on this forum will know that l do bang on about the fact that l have never been a JW but have been a life long Anglican . This does enable me to bring a different perspective to discussions on here .
You may have been told that apostates are mentally ill and lie about the Watchtower for personal reasons . If you try to tell other JWs about the things that you will learn on this site then that is probably going to be the response that you get .
Well l have no personal axe to grind and l can tell you that the WT is wrong on sooo many levels . They are false prophets and you know what the Bible says about that .
" Because of your false words and lying visions , l am against you . " declares the sovereign Lord .
So even the book that they claim to use as their guide ( !!! ) condemns them .
As to meeting with the Elders take the advice of those on here who know what they are saying .
You have the biggest part of your life ahead of you , live it JW free .